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Joined: Sep 2006
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Kerth
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OP
Kerth
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 2,292 |
As usual, I loved your writing. I know I sound the same every single time I write feedback for you, but I can't help it. I ran out of more appealing things to say waaay back! This wasn’t what he had expected. What good was it to be Superman if he couldn't protect his own daughter from a sexual predator? Being Superman isn't about what he can't do... Still, I can sympathize. He must feel so helpless. He returned to his office and sat down. “Is this what it felt like when you were weak, Claire?” He opened the box and briefly exposed her to the kryptonite within. Interesting. Earlier, he was so concerned about exposing any of his children to kryptonite, and now this. I know it's the fastest way of finding out whether it was kryptonite, but still. But what made you decide to have sex in the first place? You aren’t old enough. Which teenager will ever listen to something beginning with "you're not old enough"? None I ever knew. God knows Zared has caused plenty of problems in that regard. Oh, yes, he has.  He swallowed hard at the thought that his sons, his daughter-in-law, and his granddaughter would have to leave. He hoped it wasn’t soon. Oh, let K'al and his family leave rather soon. The sooner he's gone, the less he'll be able to cause trouble for Los (who is to stay, of course). Caitlyn whispered, “Shhh… Be quiet. I’m not… I… We’re just really good friends.”
“Uh-huh. Must be a pretty good friend since he’s coming to meet the family this weekend.”
Caitlyn looked up at her slyly. “He told you that?!” She shut the chart she had just written orders on and gave it to Jessi. She stood up. “Well... You might be surprised.”
“So he told me.”  Wonderful little scene! “Well, you aren’t pregnant. And I’m assuming that’s good news, right?” She nodded vigorously. He really had to ask? That could be due to the same defect that Jon, K’al, and I have. It sometimes affects females in such a manner. Your kidneys are fine, so I can’t readily tell is it’s from the same thing. Oh, just great [you can see the irony dripping here]! Who's next? Lara smiled broadly. “We all gave you blood!” Sweet little girl. Jama said, “Hmmm… Hannah. Anamarie isn’t here right now but shouldn’t you change? Love the outfit, by the way.”
Hannah looked down at herself. “Oh, I completely forgot.” She bent down and kissed Jon. “I’ll be right back.” The problems of a budding superheroine... Never forget which person you are. Better start talking about your other self in the third person, just to keep things straight. <I imagine that you would like to stay with Jon, wouldn’t you? I can stay in another room.> He quickly set up the test.
She teased. <Uh-huh. What room would that be, Los? The den, where I’ve been staying, or the guest room that Mari has been staying in?> Yes, both Hannah and Los fit in well with the rest of the family - and whith each other. It's great for them to be comfortable enough to start teasing. Something like that wouldn't have been possible with K'al. (Get him back home!!! Without his brother(s)!) Oh, and get back writing more pronto!
The only known quantity that moves faster than
light is the office grapevine. (from Nan's fabulous Home series)
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797 |
He returned to his office and sat down. “Is this what it felt like when you were weak, Claire?” He opened the box and briefly exposed her to the kryptonite within.
She gasped. “How… Yes. How did you know? Is that kryptonite?”
“Yes, it’s kryptonite. And I had a pretty good idea from you telling me that you felt weak… and that you couldn’t stop him.” He hugged her. “Now tell me why you think it was your fault.”
She started crying again. “We’d already had intercourse. Why wouldn’t he have thought it was okay to do it again?” She hung her head.
His eyes grew wide, but he stayed calm. “Well, let’s see. You said no, and you were fighting him. It’s not your fault, honey.” He sighed. “But what made you decide to have sex in the first place? You aren’t old enough. And you know how I feel about that. God knows Zared has caused plenty of problems in that regard.” I love how Clark supports Claire. He closed his eyes thinking about Zared having had several sexual partners. He wondered if Jenni knew. He rather doubted it. Zared is a charming boy, but he has caused a lot of problems, not just for himself but for Jon and Claire, too. I sure hope he won't be cheating on Jenni. She bit her lip. “He just kept pushing and pushing. I thought I was in love with him. And… he told me no one else would ever want to have sex with me. Not with my looks, anyway. He said I might as well take him up on it because he would be my only chance.” I feel sorry for many young girls, because they are so full of self-doubt and insecurities. Sometimes I wonder if there is something seriously wrong with the way our society makes young girls look at themselves and find themselves so inadequate. And indeed, I think many girls have sex not because they necessarily want to, but because they think it is the sort of thing they have to do to fit in. She shrugged. “And well… everybody else was having sex… Zared and Jenni, Jon and Hannah, Chloe and Ben… and even you and Caitlyn.” Well, she was wrong about Clark and Caitlyn having sex before they were married. Jon and Hannah had oral sex once. What about Chloe and Ben? Could they have been having sex? “Oh, Claire, honey. How could you *ever* believe his nonsense? Don’t you know that you are really, truly beautiful? You have your mother’s slender build and her graceful way of moving. You could even be called exotic, what with your red hair and amber eyes. In fact, you are rare beauty. Don’t you realize that?” He leaned forward and took her hand. Clark is a wonderful father here. And the way he describes Claire, I can really see how beautiful she is. He really messed with your head, didn’t he? I wish I’d known about it sooner. I would have stopped the relationship. I was inclined to stop the relationship knowing how reluctant he was to talk to me, and I should have listened to myself. He’s only talked to me once or twice and always at a distance. I’m sorry I didn’t stop it.” Yes, Alex sure messed with her head. The creep. She sighed. “I did go to the hospital. I just didn’t use my name.” She paused for a moment before she was able to go on. “Yes, he hurt me. He hit me a couple of times, too.”
Clark closed his eyes tightly and dug his nails into his palms. “What kind of injuries did you have?”
“Mostly I was bruised. The doctor said I had a couple of small tears. He... he was... really… rough with me.” Her lip trembled and she started crying again. “It wasn’t like that before. It hurt a little, but it wasn’t like that.”
“So they did a rape kit?” Clark managed to choke out.??
“I guess. I don’t know. They took scrapings from under my fingernails and stuff like that, so I guess.” This is incredibly horrible. It's hard to understand how Claire could ever consider going back to Alex again. Perhaps she was so ashamed of what had happened that going back to Alex seemed like the least terrible option? Perhaps she thought that if she pretended that nothing had happened, then the rape would sort of disappear? He closed his eyes tightly. “We need to call the police.”
She stood up and started pacing. “No. I won’t do it. I won’t report it. I don’t want to go through a trial. I don’t want my brothers and sisters to know. Chloe doesn’t even know. I told her he *almost* raped me.”
“Claire. We’re talking to the police. We’ll call Bill Henderson and talk to him first.”
“No!” She turned and ran out of the room. Clark followed and grabbed her, but she struggled away from him. “Leave me alone!”
“For now, honey. For now.” Poor Claire. It's really true that many victims of rape don't want to talk to the police. “Yes. Claire just told me. Were you the doctor that examined her?” She nodded. “Did you do a rape kit?” She nodded. “How bad were her injuries? She told me she had bruising and a couple of minor tears.”
“Yes. But one of the tears was bad enough to require a couple of stitches. It was that bad!!!  “So the guy that did this knows about her?”
Clark shrugged. “I don’t know. She didn’t even know that she had been exposed to kryptonite until I demonstrated its effects to her. I’d think if he knew that he would have told her. And I’d think he would have used it against her before. So something else must be up with Alex.” Let's hope Alex doesn't know about Claire and kryptonite! But this is sure a very scary situation. How did Claire get exposed to kryptonite just before Alex raped her? Amanda leaned forward. “So she knows who did this?” He nodded. “Clark, the D.A. has asked me about my mystery patient. They have the DNA results back. There have been three other rapes - all by the same guy.” Alex, the serial rapist. Poor Claire. She sure picked Prince Charming. Amanda looked at him. “I take it you don’t much like Ms. Drake-Smith. I mean, I know she’s not particularly fond of Superman.”
He rolled his eyes and sighed. “It’s… Oh, I’d just rather not talk about it.” I bet you'd rather not, Clark. He found her in one of her favorite hiding places - the attic. She’d always loved the attic. “Hey, honey.”
She looked up at him sadly. “Daddy. I’m late.” One shock after another! Clark nodded. He pulled his daughter close and joined her in her tears. “I’m sorry, honey. I’m so, so sorry.” I'm glad Clark is hugging her. Los had fallen asleep in Marisol’s arms. He had been so sweet and kind to her. She had feared that because of his inexperience that he would be upset to find that she wasn’t a virgin. She had been wrong. And she found that even though he was inexperienced, he wasn’t inept. She smiled thinking of the memory. And she giggled softly at the memory of her having to explain what a condom was, but he had certainly enjoyed it when she had been the one to introduce him in it’s use. Adorable! During their second time, they had shared the experience telepathically. It was almost overwhelming, but yet it was incredible. Because of the intensity, she wasn’t sure she’d want it like that *every* time, but she certainly wanted to share that experience again. She smiled. Oh, wow. That would be something to smile about!!! Los shifted in Mari’s arms. He woke up and smiled at her. He pulled her to him. He buried his face in her hair. He loved her hair. He whispered her name softly, “Mari.” He is so sweet. Claire said, “You’re being silly and overprotective, daddy.”
Los said, “You can stay. We can cover her up with a… hmm… large sleeping cloth.”
Claire said, “Yeah, a sheet.” I like that practical solution. Los smiled at her. “Well, you aren’t pregnant. And I’m assuming that’s good news, right?” She nodded vigorously. “You do have a small ovarian cyst. That could be due to the same defect that Jon, K’al, and I have. It sometimes affects females in such a manner. Your kidneys are fine, so I can’t readily tell is it’s from the same thing. You will need a couple of blood tests. Are you having pain?”
She shook her head no. “Then I don’t need to examine you until I get the tests back.”
She sighed heavily and sat up. She pulled her knees up and wrapped her arms around them. “Then why am I two weeks late?” I'm glad she isn't pregnant with a rapist's child, but I, too, wonder why she is two weeks late. “You never gave me your answer.”
“I… uh… You kind of took me off guard.” She kissed him softly on the lips. “Yes, Jon, I’ll marry you. And I won’t push you to do something that you don’t want to do. I guess… I was afraid I was going to lose you if we didn’t have sex.”
He smiled. “You’re stuck with me, Hannah.” How sweet! Jon raised an eyebrow. “Yep. So I hear Lara talked to dad at the hospital, and the two of you are a little bummed by that. It’ll get stronger. Promise.” I'm glad that Jon is being so kind to Jama and Brook. Those two girls have been kind of neglected. (But then, Jon is an incredibly nice guy, no doubt about it.) Meowoof jumped up on Jon’s lap just missing his abdomen. Jon said, “Whoa, girl. Do you have good aim or what?” He reached down and patted Two Bark’s head then began stroking Meowoof along her sleek body. Ouch! Sweet scene, though. He ran into Hannah on her way back to Jon’s room… his and Jon’s room. He smiled at her. “Is Jon home?” She nodded and he followed her through the door. When he saw that Jon was asleep he used telepathy. <I imagine that you would like to stay with Jon, wouldn’t you? I can stay in another room.> He quickly set up the test. She teased. <Uh-huh. What room would that be, Los? The den, where I’ve been staying, or the guest room that Mari has been staying in?> She didn’t expect Los’ bright blush. She continued. <You… Did you…> She smiled broadly. <Did you get that kiss?> He nodded. She winked at him. <And more, I bet.> I love it! Like Olympe said, it's so sweet that Hannah can joke with Los like that. He's really part of the family now! (Unlike K'al.) Los walked out of the room and walked toward the room Mari was in. As he walked by an open door, an arm shot out and pulled him in the room. Gaaahhh!!! Let's hope that was just Mari fooling around with him!!! Great chapter as usual, Nancy. Ann
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 2,687
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 2,687 |
“You aren’t going to go kill him, are you?”
He kissed her forehead. “No, Claire.” aww! poor sweetie, your dad is a good guy, he would never do such a thing. He raised an eyebrow. ‘Chloe and Ben were having sex?’ Surpriiiiiiiiiiiiiiise! *lol* He leaned back. “Mayson Drake… again.” He blew air out in frustration. Yeah, I'm blowing air in frustration here, too... Mayson Drake should be dead... *sigh* (lol!) You *might* have a tubal pregnancy… or an ovarian cyst. Pleaseeeeeeeeee let it be a cyst!! During their second time, they had shared the experience telepathically. Second? my, my, they're going at it like bunnies. *lol* Just kidding! Nice! Looking forward to the next part. 
Superman: Why is it that good villains never die?
Batman: Clark, what the hell are good villains?
=> Superman/Batman: Public Enemies
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,846
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,846 |
Hi, Great part! 
Maria D. Ferdez.
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Don't like Luthor, unfinished, untitled and crossover story, and people that promises and don't deliver. I'm getting choosy with age.
MAF
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 151
Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 151 |
Hi Nancy, This part was beautifully written. We choked back the tears  - name in name, evil in evil.  Regards, Stuart
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,166
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,166 |
*The story, A New Hero, and all of its characters are fictional.* As usual, I loved your writing. I know I sound the same every single time I write feedback for you, but I can't help it. I ran out of more appealing things to say waaay back! Ah, Mellie… You sure know how to make a girl’s day. Thanks. Interesting. Earlier, he was so concerned about exposing any of his children to kryptonite, and now this. I know it's the fastest way of finding out whether it was kryptonite, but still. Yes, but this was an extremely brief exposure. Which teenager will ever listen to something beginning with "you're not old enough"? None I ever knew. Yes… you are right. God knows Zared has caused plenty of problems in that regard. Oh, yes, he has. And can you imagine what’s going to happen when Jenni finds out there was more than than just the girl in the barn? “And I don’t think Jon and Hannah have been having sex.” Of course, he knew what had happened between Jon and Hannah, but what he said to Claire about the subject was adequate.
Not quite the truth. It's called oral *** True, but at the time Claire chose to have sex (before the rape) Jon and Hannah hadn’t done that yet. Maybe they caused some problems with their skinny dipping… Hmm? Never looked any other boy in the eyes, did she? She’s young. Maybe she didn’t recognize ‘the look’ Huh? No. Same name He swallowed hard at the thought that his sons, his daughter-in-law, and his granddaughter would have to leave. He hoped it wasn’t soon. Oh, let K'al and his family leave rather soon. The sooner he's gone, the less he'll be able to cause trouble for Los (who is to stay, of course). Oh, but maybe Clark needs some time to shake some sense into that boy (K’al) and teach him to be a more gentle soul. Los (who is to stay, of course). - name in name, evil in evil. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Well, my day just got even better, Stuart!! Thank you SO much!!! Maybe you can find a different way to get rid of Mayson Drake and Evil Alex  - Bill Henderson finds that she was the paymaster who gave Alex the Kryptonite and paid him to rape poor Claire. Let them both go down for their crimes - better than letting any of the Brothers go after them both or any of the other JLA members. Interesting idea… Yeah, I'm blowing air in frustration here, too... Mayson Drake should be dead... *sigh* (lol!) Okay, okay, already… I’ll do something *to* Mayson Drake. The woman cannot be trusted… And to all of you… Merry Christmas. ![[Linked Image]](http://www.cosgan.de/images/smilie/xmas/e022.gif)
~~Even heroes have the right to dream.~~
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 37
Blogger
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Blogger
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 37 |
Hi! I've been following this story from the beginning and think its great! I especially enjoy Clark being such a wonderful Father! Keep up the wonderful writing and post often, I want more!!!! 
G. Kuhn
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 2,292
Kerth
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OP
Kerth
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 2,292 |
And can you imagine what’s going to happen when Jenni finds out there was more than than just the girl in the barn? Vividly! She'll be a force to be reconned with. Poor Zared.  rue, but at the time Claire chose to have sex (before the rape) Jon and Hannah hadn’t done that yet. Maybe they caused some problems with their skinny dipping… Hmm? Bruce said the didn't. And he's the world's greatest detective... Oh, but maybe Clark needs some time to shake some sense into that boy (K’al) and teach him to be a more gentle soul. I wonder if that's still possible. Well, you'll let us know. Los (who is to stay, of course). Don't give me that look! You can thank Mellie for this. She wrote about ½ of this paragraph. Was it really that much? quote: Yes, Alex sure messed with her head. The creep. Yes, he is a creep… I might have to kill him… Make it kryptonite poisoning! Gaaahhh!!! Let's hope that was just Mari fooling around with him!!! I have the sinking feeling in my stomach that it's K'al...
The only known quantity that moves faster than
light is the office grapevine. (from Nan's fabulous Home series)
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,166
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,166 |
Keep up the wonderful writing and post often, I want more!!!! A new poster of feedback!! Yeah!! Thank you so much, G. Kuhn!! Bruce said the didn't. And he's the world's greatest detective... I meant that maybe Clarks’ kids thought that hanky panky was going on instead of just skinny dipping… Gaaahhh!!! Let's hope that was just Mari fooling around with him!!! I have the sinking feeling in my stomach that it's K'al... Mari? K’al? Clark? Somebody else?
~~Even heroes have the right to dream.~~
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 52
Freelance Reporter
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Freelance Reporter
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 52 |
I would like to see Claire have a bit of closer, and see the kid punished. Also love to see Zara again.
Shelley
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,166
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,166 |
Another new leaver of feedback!! Goody, goody!!!  Thank you so much, Shelley! Yes, the guy will get his due... And Zara will probably make another appearance.
~~Even heroes have the right to dream.~~
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