I have to thank Nancy for patiently working her way through my countless rewrites of this whole episode (including the two parts following this one - it's all just one extremely long scene). Without her constant nagging, her great suggestions and encouragement it wouldn't be half as good as it turned out to be. In fact, it wouldn't even be half as long as it is.
Enjoy!
Part 6At last, the dishes were cleared away, and an uncomfortable silence hung in the air after Clark, Lois and Lucy had had dinner. During their lunch – which was as awkward as could be – Clark had decided to let Lucy to stay with him and Lois, which made his place rather crowded. This offer of his had changed Lucy's mind about Clark being all macho – at least he was a *nice* macho. After that, another argument concerning their sleeping arrangements had ensued. Both Lucy and Lois had agreed on wanting to share the bed with him for one reason or another, which, in turn, had put Clark in a rather uncomfortable position. In the end, he had managed to solve this problem by telling Lois and Lucy that they were free to share the bed with each other, and they had grudgingly accepted.
Being unable to bear the silence any longer, Clark cleared his throat. "So, what do you ladies want to do now?"
This was exactly what Lucy was secretly hoping to hear, so she answered, "Well, why don't we play something like truth or dare?"
Lois agreed, "I like that idea. Perhaps we could create our own version?"
"Yeah, throw the dice to see who wins. The winner may ask someone of her choice a question. If the chosen one does not answer, he has to take the dare..." Lucy supplemented.
Clark was squirming, feeling terribly uncomfortable. Lucy's choice of pronouns did *not* bode well for him, so he tried to get out of the immediate danger. "Why don't I leave you two so you can play?"
"No way!!!" chorused Lois and Lucy. Lucy added, "I already know my sister. I'd be much more interested in uncovering *your* dirty little secrets. By the way, Clark, do you have any drinks to offer?" Lucy and Lois looked pleadingly at Clark.
At that, Clark sighed and admitted defeat. He just couldn't resist Lois. "You will be disappointed, though. Because I don't have any 'dirty little secrets'," Clark stated. Then he turned to get a bottle of wine plus corkscrew, three glasses and a set of dice.
They all sat down on the couch, Lois and Lucy each making sure to sit beside their host. Clark, sandwiched between Lucy and Lois, poured each of them a glass of wine. They cast their dice.
"Uh, Clark, just a two? You're not trying very hard, are you? I've got a five. Let's see Lois' result," Lucy said.
Lois made a great show of kissing her die before throwing it. Clark felt his blood boil. If Lois just wasn't bestowing her favours on a stupid die...
"Six! I won!" she exclaimed and repeatedly kissed her die. Clark wondered idly why she didn't kiss him instead of that stupid die. He shook his head to get his mind off that particular track.
"Well, *farmboy*, I hope you don't expect to get to ask too many questions of your own," Lois mocked. Then she shot her first question at Clark, "Let's start with a softball question, shall we? Sooo, what did you mean when you claimed that you don't have any 'dirty little secrets'?"
Clark pondered the question for a moment before answering. He could either answer it - and make both his guests rather curious, or he could take the dare - and make them at least equally curious. So he decided to spare himself the indignity of the dare - he was sure that Lois would come up with something that would embarrass him to no end. Taking a deep breath, he started. "Well, what would you call dirty? I don't do anything criminal, and neither have I left any women with a child of mine behind. So, my secrets, for one, certainly don't qualify for dirty." In his thoughts, he completed that statement. 'And apart from that, my secrets are far from small.'
Lois and Lucy looked at each other, both of them sporting one raised eyebrow. In order to avoid any exchange between the two sisters, Clark threw his die for the next turn. He was sure that *this* was not a winning result, either. At least, he had increased his score by one. Lois, and then Lucy, followed suit. Lois' face lit up when she saw her result. "Five!" she announced happily. But Lucy beat her by one point.
"Hmm, I don't know that much about you," she stated, looking hopefully at Clark. "I'd like to start with a really easy question. What is your middle name?"
Clark felt trapped. He knew that the answer to this could lead to one of his secrets, but he answered nonetheless. "It's Jerome."
Lucy acknowledged this, "Uh-huh, so it's Jerome. Clark Jer..." Suddenly Lucy's eyes widened in shock at the implications. Her current favourite author's name was Jerry Clark. As in Jerome. And he had claimed in his forum that it was a pseudonym designed from his middle name and his mother's maiden name. 'Can that really be?' she asked herself. Lucy intended to find out then and there. "Just what happens to be your mother's maiden name?"
"Wait for your next question, will you?" Clark retorted genially. What he didn't expect was Lois interference.
Lois simply answered her sister's question, "Martha's maiden name was Clark. That's why it's Clark Kent, you know?" she said with a sweet smile. Clark had the distinct impression that Lois and Lucy had formed an alliance. That did not only *not* bode well for him, it had spelled 'disaster' all over the evening. Worse for him was that Lucy seemed to put the facts together. In his 'Jerry Clark' forum, Clark had given away how he had generated his pseudonym. Lucy's stunned expression told him that she put one - Clark Kent - and one - Jerry Clark - together - and came up with one: Clark Jerome Kent. Even Lois, who didn't seem to know anything about his 'Jerry Clark' persona, came to the conclusion that she was missing something. The expression on Lucy's face was telling Clark discreetly refilled their glasses, although his was the only one that had been completely empty.
"So, do you two want to play on?" Clark asked, hoping against hope that Lois wouldn’t understand the latest revelation. At least, not that very evening.
So, again they threw their dice. Lucy only got a one.
"Next time I'm gonna try Lois' method. Kissing the die seems to work," she commented dryly. Clark felt relatively safe with a five but was still beaten by Lois.
"So, Clarrrk," she purred. "What *is* your biggest secret?"
Clark shook his head. "You don't really expect me to answer that?"
"Does that mean that you'd rather take the dare?" Lois inquired with mock innocence. At his nod, she cooed, "So very good of you. You remember the first time I came to your place? The one before you got this place? I was a little early..."
Once again, Clark nodded. And he didn't like what was about to come...
"I told my little sister about meeting you in nothing but a towel. And she wouldn't believe my ... descriptions. Perhaps you could prove to her what she didn't believe then?" Lois suggested, coquettishly batting her eyelashes at him.
Clark felt that he had to clarify this order. "So, you want me to get undressed .."
"Completely undressed!" interrupted Lois.
"Completely undressed," amended Clark, "and get myself wrapped in a towel?" By way of answer, Lois simply nodded. With a sigh, Clark downed the contents of his glass. Then he got up and went into his bathroom. Secretly, he was glad that he at least didn't have to strip in front of them. Besides, he owned a few very large bath towels. Lois had not commanded him to use a small one, after all. So he undressed, thereby neatly folding his clothes, wrapped the largest of his towels around his belly and looked down at himself. Satisfied, he noticed that everything from slightly above his navel down to the middle of his lower legs was covered comfortably. Then, he returned to his 'audience'.
While Clark was away, Lucy quickly put most of her wine into Clark's glass. At her encouraging gesture, Lois followed suit. In their opinion, getting Clark drunk certainly was a good idea.
As Clark had expected, Lois glared at him, feeling tricked of a treat. What he did not expect, however, was that Lucy was positively drooling. *That* made him blush crimson.
"So, you did wax your chest, after all. It sure looks good," Lucy gushed while getting up. She then took a few steps towards a very puzzled looking Clark and smoothed her hand over his chest. "Hmm, and it feels so good," she continued, inching even closer to him. She was close enough to be able to kiss him on his chest and was lowering her head to do just that. Feeling his blood rush to several places – his face, for one - Clark suddenly took a step backward. He looked at Lucy in awkward silence while trying to regain control of his body, but some body parts elude control. There was a definite tent pole under his towel. Lois' features turned from alarmed to a rather amused expression. Automatically, Clark returned to his seat, reached for his wine glass and emptied it - again. In his opinion, the situation with Lucy was getting terribly out of hand.
Although he didn't get drunk, Clark usually took care not to drink more than a human possibly could get away with. But that was usually. This evening, he was preoccupied with Lois being so near, and Lucy causing him to react in such an embarrassing way, so he completely forgot about that. He just drank, feeling some odd comfort from drinking. Besides, wasn't alcohol supposed to suppress certain reactions?
Once again, Clark was sitting between the two women, both of whom were moving nearer to him. Clark decided that he needed a distraction. And he needed it soon. Once again they threw their dice. Lucy got only a two. Lois kissed her die before throwing it, and when she saw the result - a five - she started to hum a song that strongly resembled "The Winner Takes It All".
Clark had already cast his die but had it covered with his hands. When he uncovered it, he announced triumphantly, "Six!" Lois abruptly stopped humming.
Since he had won this round of dice – honestly, by the way - he was relieved to be able to come up with the distraction he had been hoping for. He knew just what he needed to keep Lucy in check...
"Lucy, how many lovers have you had?"
Lucy frowned. "I don't know for sure. Somewhere between six and nine."
"How can you not know?" asked Clark, his brows raised quizzically.
"Well, there were a few times where I got terribly drunk. I don't remember what happened in the course of the respective evening, but I remember waking up in someone else's bed suffering from the mother of all hangovers. So I guess I'll have to take the dare," Lucy explained, smiling lasciviously.
Clark tried to hide his surprise. He hadn't expected Lucy to have had that sort of experience, much less more than once. He was even more surprised at her straight-forwardness. And he had to come up with a dare on top of it. It took him a little while before he knew what he could make her do that would be able to distract her...
"Okay, I've got an idea. I want you to call Jimmy. Tell him whatever you want, but make sure he comes here. I'm sure he'll jump at an opportunity to see you again."
Lucy shot him a quizzical look. "Why? Aren't you man enough to cope with the two of us?"
Clark sighed. "You are doing such a good job at dissecting me - like a frog, I might add - that I feel that I need some backup. Besides, Jimmy has hinted more than once that he has a crush on you..." He looked sheepishly at his guests.
Lois and Lucy burst out laughing. They laughed until they gasped for air. When they were finally able to calm down again, Lucy went to Clark's phone. "Can any of you give me his number?"
Clark dialed for her, turned on the loudspeaker, and Lucy took up the handset. When Jimmy finally answered, she said, "Hello, Jimmy! It's me, Lucy!"
"Uhm, hello." There was a pause.
Then Lucy picked up the conversation. "Don't you want to know why I called you?" Lucy asked, pouting a little.
"Sure, I do. So, why did you call?"
"Actually, I'm here at Clark's. He has just left to do some work, and he said that this might well take the whole night, so I'm here on my own... You know, it's kind of lonely." With that, Lucy's voice had dropped an octave, sounding husky and promising.
"I can't imagine Clark doing that. I mean, that's not like him..."
"Yeah, imagine my surprise. But we could have his whole apartment to ourselves. Wanna come over?"
"I don't know. I mean, it's Clark's place, after all." Jimmy sounded uncomfortable.
"It's all his own fault. He decided to leave me here. Besides, he told me to make myself at home. You know, I'd really like some company, and the first person I thought of was you."
"Okay, I'll come over. See you there!" There was a certain note of excitement in his voice. Jimmy didn't dare to question his luck any further.
"Wait a second! I wanted to ask a favour of you. Lois told me you were really good with cocktails..."
"True, it's a hobby of mine."
"Perhaps you could bring something? Make it a lot of something. I really appreciate good cocktails. Especially sweet ones with a lot of 'wham!' in them."
"Sure thing! I'm on my way!" With that, Jimmy hung up.
Lois and Clark burst out laughing. When it finally subsided, Clark said,
"Remind me to *never* let a Lane woman have her way with my place!"
With that, the laughing started all over again, and this time, Lucy joined in. After a while Clark decided that it was time for another drink. To his disappointment, the bottle of wine was empty by then, so he went to look into his fridge and fetched some champagne and a new set of glasses which he quickly filled. Lucy had already cast her die, resulting in a four. Lois was going through the motion of kissing her die before casting it. She beat her sister by one point. Clark tried his luck, but he reached only a draw with Lucy. To Clark’s relief, Lois picked her sister instead of him.
"Okay, spit it out! What did you find out about Clark?" Lois asked bluntly.
"I don't know whether I can tell you this. I mean, after all *he* took the dare, didn't he?"
Clark chuckled. "Oh, you can tell her, all right. I really wanted to tell her that quite soon."
Lucy was not convinced. "But why on earth did you take the dare?"
Clark shrugged. "Lois asked me to reveal my *biggest* secret..." Clark bit his tongue, wondering what it was that had made him say that.
Lucy all but cried out, "You mean you have a *secret identity* and this is *not* your biggest secret?!?" Lois' eyes grew round. Clark had a secret identity? What was that supposed to mean?
"It's *not* a secret identity, it's merely a pseudonym I used for writing for heaven's sake!" Clark replied.
Lois let out the breath she had been holding. Clark did *not * have a secret identity. He had only used a pseudonym for writing. But what on earth could he have written?
"Wait a minute!" Lois demanded. "*You* did some writing? Under another name? When?"
Clark explained, "Since we talked about it recently... Remember that writing contest you challenged me to? That's when I started..."
Lois started babbling, "But only the winner was supposed to get a contract. I was ranked second, and I didn't even get a decent offer..." She looked up at Clark when realization hit. "So *you* are the winner, that 'Jerry Clark' guy. When did you intend to let me know?"
"Christmas."
"You can darn well tell that to Santa Claus!" Lois replied heatedly.
"I can prove it, Lois. I really can," Clark nearly begged.
Lois was far from believing it. "That'd better be good. You've got one minute..."
Clark nodded his head and dashed into his bedroom. When he returned, he did so with a stack of five wrapped packages, all of them about the same size. "It's a bit early for Christmas presents, but... well, just open them and read the first few pages, okay?" with that, he handed the packages to Lois, who reluctantly started unwrapping them.
Lucy eyed Clark suspiciously. "You've just published your fourth book. So why are there five of them?"
Clark explained, "The fifth one is an advance copy I got last week. I thought getting it might soften her up a little. It's sort of exclusive, and Lois likes exclusives, you see?"
"The only exclusive you can soften me up with is an interview, buster!" Lois muttered, still unwrapping.
"Sorry about that, but that's impossible. I already promised that to Perry, should I ever decide to go public."
"You promised *my* exclusive to Perry?" Lois was shocked.
"I had to. Sort of. He figured it out about two weeks after the release of my first book. Besides, I owe him for not telling anybody. So, yes, I promised *him* an exclusive when I finally decided to go public."
"So that's why you slipped out on me out from your editor's office? On second thought, it wasn't too bright to tell you that I wanted to nail.. well, the other you, at your editor's, was it, now? But you had absolutely no reason to throw me out of your forum. That really bugged me." With that, Lois glared at Clark.
"That's good. Because it bugged *me* that you used *my* email address to enter that forum."
This time, Lois actually blushed. "Oops. Forgot about that. Must have been funny, writing to yourself, though."
Clark had to laugh at that. "Yeah. But I found it less funny that everybody got to know LoLa to have the email address 'Clark-Kent@DailyPlanet.com'. I mean, what were people going to think of me?" Lucy was giggling uncontrollably while Lois' blush deepened.
Lois finally opened the first of Clark's books and looked inside. "You actually wrote something inside?"
"They are even hand-signed, Lois. Do you have any idea how rare that is? It's one out of four hand-signed sets," Clark replied.
"Who got the other ones?" Lois wanted to know.
"One set went to my parents, one to my editor, and one to Perry - who has passed them on to Alice, I suppose."
Looking up at Clark through her eyelashes, Lucy asked, "Do you think I could have one, too?"
Laughing again, Clark got up and went to his bookshelf. He returned with his own copies of his 'Adventures in ...' series and a pen. Then he sat down, wrote a few lines into each of the books, signed them with both his names and handed them to Lucy. "Here you are. With my full name as well as my pseudonym."
"Thank you. By the way, what is the title of your fifth book?"
"It's 'Adventures in South America'," Lois answered. "So, there is bound to be an 'Adventures in North America' too?"
"Yes, I'm already working on it."
"Will you write anything else after your sixth volume is finished?" inquired Lucy.
Clark pondered that for a moment. Then he answered, "Should I decide to go public, I could write something like "Adventures in Metropolis". What Lois and I have gone through is fit to fill several books."
"But that one we'll write together, *partner*!" Lois put in.
"Well, if that softens you up enough to call me 'partner' again..." Clark grinned. With a start he realized that his glass - and only his glass - was empty once again, so he automatically refilled it. 'Let's see what they have in mind,' he thought.
Lois replied by grinning back and throwing her die. "Let's see what else you have buried in your closet!" she mocked as she saw she got a four. Again, she started humming "The Winner Takes It All". Lucy and Clark followed suit. Clark won with a five and decided that it was Lois' turn to answer - or rather act. He just had to pick the right question...
"Well Lois, you certainly remember the time shortly before you were engaged to Luthor. We met in that park..." At Lois nod, Clark continued, "You asked me to contact Superman for you. What I want you to tell us is what happened when you met. What did you do - or talk about, for that matter?"
"That's your question?" Lois squeaked. Clark simply nodded, his eyes twinkling mischievously. She knew she was never going to live that one down. Lucy wouldn't let her hear the last of it. And Clark... She was sure that he really didn't want to know.
Lois sighed, "I'll take the dare."
By then, Clark's eyes were sparkling. "Well, since you got me to undress, I think payback is only fair. So, why don't you get started *here* and *now*?" Of course, he was aware that he couldn't let her undress completely. That would most assuredly botch their friendship. But he figured that she didn't have to know that he intended to stop her - eventually.
Lois gulped. That was about the last thing she had expected. Clark was always so much of a boy scout. Looking at him in the hope that he was just joking, she discovered that he was dead serious. As a matter of fact, he was putting a CD in his player, and ABBA's "Dancing Queen" started to play. Clark just couldn't resist the pun. After all, she was the one to start this whole ABBA thing. 'How dare he give me *that* smile that always makes me weak in my knees?'she thought. Loud she said with dripping sarcasm, "Dancing Queen, That's Me, I suppose. Thank You For The Music!" before draining her glass.
Slowly, almost paralyzed, Lois got up and started to undress slowly and hesitantly. First, she got out of her shoes, which proved to be rather easy. She didn't have any difficulties with her jacket. Her pantyhose proved troublesome, though. Whoever invented these things should be strangled with them! Then she slowly unbuttoned her blouse. She caught Clark staring at her, his face showing something she couldn't quite put into words. Desire? Anticipation? Lust? Nothing seemed to fit. Lois smiled at him seductively and started to unbutton her blouse, only to reveal that she wore a top beneath. She wasn't entirely sure whether she had heard a sigh from Clark and smirked at him. In the meantime, Clark drank up his champagne, too, quickly refilling the two empty glasses.
Then, Lois' real trouble began. She hesitated for a moment, not sure whether she should continue with her skirt or rather with her top. Since her fingers were trembling slightly, she decided to get out of her top first. She was barely out of it, revealing her bra to sport Superman's emblem when, once again, she glanced at Clark, his mouth hanging open. In fact, there was some drool gathering at the edge of his lips. Funnily enough, this gave her the encouragement she needed to start with her skirt. She opened it and lowered it ever so slowly to the ground. In the back of his mind Clark realized that her panty matched her bra. Again, Lois hesitated. She really didn't want to go on. When her right hand moved to the left strap of her bra, Clark cleared his throat. He knew that Lois was incredibly beautiful but seeing it displayed like that was ... Wow! In his mind, Clark heard the refrain of another song: 'Mamma mia, here I go again, my, my, how can I resist you? Mamma mia, does it show again?' When he reached that part, he had to check whether *it* did show again. Needless to say, it did. Clark considered crossing his legs but decided that that would look even more stupid than the stupid tent he was sporting at the moment.
With a startClark realized that Lois would never forgive him if he didn't stop her at once. He stopped the music instantly. Puzzled, Lois looked at him, faltering in mid-movement.
"Lois, I think you should stop here." Did she imagine it or did his voice sound different? And did his eyes always seem to glow like that? Or was it just the light? Confused, Lois sat down beside Clark her eyes avoiding his gaze. To Clark's utter embarrassment, Lois was looking straight at the towel...
Suddenly, Lucy made her presence known. She cleared her throat - repeatedly - and, when she was sure of their attention, asked, "So, at which stage are you two now? Knowing Me, Knowing You? Voulez-Vous?" Noting their stunned looks, she added, "You know, this is not The Way Old Friends Do." Then she threw her die. "Four for me!" she exclaimed.
Lois and Clark followed her lead.
"Two," Clark said, sounding slightly disappointed.
"Another four," Lois stated.
"So, what do we do now?" asked Lucy.
"Well, since we *both* won, I'd say that each of us gets a turn," Lois concluded.
"Oh no, you don't. Either you agree on a question, or you have to throw your dice again to determine who won," Clark insisted.
Lois and Lucy exchanged a look. After a second, they reached a decision. Both sisters got up and went into the kitchen. There, they whispered for some time. The whispering sounded furious at the end. Clark made out something like "Rock, paper, scissors" before they returned. As they sat down on either side of Clark, Lucy was grinning broadly.
Lucy asked, "You know, Clark, I totally agree with you: Payback is only fair. So let me ask you... With how many women have you been - well, how do I say this? Intimate?"
Clark blushed crimson. "No way I'm going to tell you that!"
Lucy smiled knowledgeably. "Oh, there are other ways to find out... Just show me what you'd call the perfect kiss, and I'll have a rough estimate."
This time, Clark had to smile back. "You want me to show you the perfect kiss? That's all?" Somehow, he managed not to put too much stress on the word 'show'.
Lucy leaned over to him and slightly parted her lips, oblivious to her sister's very obvious discomfort. "Yes, that's all - for now. So, give it your best shot. And don't chicken out on me. I'm Just A Girl."
Clark got up, still looking at Lucy. He graced her with one of his smiles while he thought about his options. After all, Lucy had dared him to 'show' her the perfect kiss. She never said that he'd have to kiss her. 'Well, Lucy might be Just A Girl, but Lois – well, She's My Kind Of Girl,' Clark thought. Having reached a decision, he grabbed Lois in an all-too-quick motion and picked her up in his arms. He put a few steps of distance between themselves and Lucy before gently lowering Lois down. His heart was beating rapidly. So was hers, as he noticed. Carefully, he wrapped her in his arms and pulled her to his chest. Lois looked up at him, and her mouth opened ever so slightly.
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tbc (tomorrow)
