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#37709 01/22/07 09:23 AM
Joined: Apr 2003
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Hi,

Great part! grumble


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He loves Marisol, and she *is* the Queen of Wheat you know.~”

Zara chuckled. “~Kal. I spent enough time on this planet to know that there is no royalty in this country. Los has already mentioned this to me, but I know it means nothing. I didn’t tell him that though. He loves her a lot, doesn’t he?~”

Clark nodded. “~He certainly does.~”

She grinned. “~And I like Marisol. Hmm.... Drull was a cousin of Lord Nor’s, and he was actually a lower Lord. The council might not like it because Nor’s house is still considered disgraced, but I can declare her a lower Lady.~”
eek Could it be possible that Erika stole the child?


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It hadn’t been easy, because as soon as she had arrived via the matter transport beam, Lady Edrika had somehow managed to follow her. The cloak was big enough to hide a small group of people, but she had ended up having to tranquilize Edrika as she was determined to find Lord Los-El.
This woman is problem. :rolleyes:


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But Lady Edrika seemed to somehow think she could force the issue by making up wild stories about Lords Los-El and K’al-El and Lady Rya-Pe. Well, Mak didn’t believe any of it. And even if it was true, Edrika should keep her mouth shut.
What does Mak knows about Erika? confused


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He smiled at her and finally, reluctantly left her to deal with Edrika.
eek He should have Clark on his side to deal with this woman.


Don't wait to long to post. wink


More ASAP, please.

MAF hyper


Maria D. Ferdez.
---
Don't like Luthor, unfinished, untitled and crossover story, and people that promises and don't deliver. I'm getting choosy with age.
MAF
#37710 01/22/07 06:03 PM
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,166
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Thanks, Maria!!

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She is too young to play around. grumble
Yes, she is. But kids don’t always do what they are supposed to do.


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Could it be possible that Erika stole the child?
Huh? Drull was Marisol’s father. Edrika wouldn’t have been old enough to steal her.

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What does Mak knows about Erika?
That Edrika is making allegations against Los, K’al and Rya that Mak doesn’t think are true. Edrika has made allegations that Rya was pregnant when she and K’al were married and that Los knew about it. (And while the allegations do just happen to be true, Edrika has no proof.)

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Don't wait to long to post.
Not as long this time. Promise!


~~Even heroes have the right to dream.~~
#37711 01/22/07 11:26 PM
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797
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Well, Nancy, it's no secret that I'm more interested in some of the characters in your story than in others, so let me talk about those who interest me!

Right now, my hands-down favorites are Chloe and Ben. I love how you've written their young love. They are such sweet, good kids, and in their own way, they are mature, too. I absolutely loved how Chloe handled that drunk driver. I admired how she managed to keep her "Blue Fairy" activity a secret from Ben, too. But maybe she should tell him. Having to listen to Ben's hero worship of Superman must be a little... frustrating, perhaps?

Ben, too, is a splendidly good kid. I love how he supports his mother. I love how he is gentlemanly enough to want to pay for Chloe when they go out together, but I loved it even more that he was able to swallow his pride and accept money from Chloe for his mother's sake. I also love that he is so close to his mother, and that he tells her more or less everything. His mother seems to be a good person too, and I'm sure she is trying to steer Ben down the straight and narrow path.

Now, the fact is that Ben and Chloe have had sex. Like Maria said, Chloe is too young to play around, that's true. But it's also true that from a physical, biological point of view, her body is ready for sex. Yes, it would have been much better if she had waited, but I'm not going to bawl her out because she didn't. The thing is that she and Ben love each other very, very much - I love how you have described their love.

Now Chloe is apparently pregnant. I find this situation absolutely fascinating. Chloe doesn't know, and doesn't want to realize, that she is pregnant, but she is bound to find out soon enough. I believe it's too late for her to have an abortion (and from what you have said of abortions on other occasions on the boards, Nancy, I wouldn't expect you to allow Chloe to have an abortion). The way you have written Chloe, too, makes me feel that Chloe herself wouldn't abort a child she was carrying.

So, Ben and Chloe are going to be parents - at sixteen. It happens. Right now, I teach a seventeen-year-old girl who is the mother of a 16-month-old boy. The girl is a conscientious student and a caring and responsible mother. Like I said, these things happen. It will be extremely interesting to see how the story of Ben and Chloe will unfold.

I'm also eager to see more of Claire. How will she deal with having been raped? Will she testify against Alex? (Yes, I really think she will.) What will that be like? What will happen to her relationship with Trace? How will she react when she learns that Chloe is pregnant? How will "the sisterhood of the twins" be affected by this?

Right now, I don't feel quite so eager to see more of Los and Mari. I have the feeling that their relationship is a doomed one, and I don't get very big kicks out of unhappy love stories. Oh, well. Chloe and Ben, and Claire, with or without Trace, are going to keep me interested for a long time. (Oh, and... there's Jon and Hannah, too!! Yes!!!)

Ann

#37712 01/23/07 08:00 AM
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 2,292
Kerth
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Posts: 2,292
Ann, don't be so pessimistic! I know that Nancy has two happy couples in the work, and she is considering another one. Of course, all of them will have to sort through some issues, but hey, writing about a perfect, happily-ever-after relationship is kind of boring, don't you think?

So, feedback for Nancy:

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Beth continued, “Well, no I don’t guess you really realize what this could mean yet.” She looked back at Ben. “I can ground you, you know. I can take your car keys.”
[Linked Image] Won't do her much good. Chloe can still come and sweep him off his feet. Beth doesn't know with whom she's messing here...

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Ben frowned at his mom and watched as Chloe walked down the hall. When she closed the bathroom door, he said, “Don’t snap at Chloe. I don’t like it.”
Yes, Ben, show her! You got that right! That guy is so... [Linked Image]

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“I’ll be right out, honey. Just give me another minute.” She sighed. Now she really did have to ‘go’.
Sounds familiar.

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“We have to consummate... Now!” After closing the door behind him he started stripping off his clothing. Mari just stood there staring at him. He took a deep breath and motioned for her to do the same. “Well, don’t get shy now.”

She rolled her eyes. “You are *so* romantic,” she said sarcastically.

A bit frustrated, he said, “I’ll be romantic later. I’m telling you... we have to do this before Mother or K’al find out. Now!” He walked to her and started taking her clothing off.
I just loved that exchange. Well, Mari, that happens if you marry someone from NK.

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“I’m hungry. Let’s order a pizza.” She raised an eyebrow suggestively. “Then maybe we’ll have time for another trip to your bedroom.”
Increased libido, hmm? Isn't that supposed to be related to a pregnancy, too? [Linked Image]

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Her family never acted rich or anything, but they sure had a huge home. He wondered if it was paid for by the life insurance from Chloe’s mom’s death.
Doesn't Ben know that Clark is a best-selling author? As was/is Lois?

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“Ben, honey, take it. Pay something on one of those bills. Your mom doesn’t have to know where the money came from.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Just a friendly benefactor helping out, huh?”
A friendly neighbourhood Flying Sprite...

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Ben cocked his head sideways as he picked up his first slice of pizza. Chloe had already eaten three slices... plus several breadsticks and a good portion of the salad.
She's eating at super-speed, and Ben doesn't notice anything strange? What is he, galactically stupid? Or as blind as a bat?

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Chloe furrowed her brow. “Well, no actually he’s not, Ben. You’re 6’ 5”. He’s... umm... I don’t know. Maaybbbee 6’ 2”” She rolled her eyes thinking that her dad was six feet when he stood barefooted, but everyone always thought Superman was so much taller.
[Linked Image] [Linked Image] [Linked Image]
It's so sweet how she avoids to tell him.

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He crossed his arms. “Just listen to me. Mom told me that sometimes you can have bleeding all through a pregnancy.”

Chloe’s mouth dropped open in horror. “You *told* your mom you thought I was pregnant!! Ben! How *could* you!?”
Well, one of you had to start talking to someone adult. And you won't be spared.

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She pulled away and looked at him as she chewed her lip. “PMS.” She pouted.
Yeah, Chloe, 28 or so days per cycle...

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He closed his eyes tightly. “No, of course not. But if you are... then you need to see a doctor - especially since our first time was in January, and now it’s June.
Especially since she is the first invulnerable mother-to-be. That's much more of an issue...

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Her eyebrow shot up. “Zara? As in Lady Zara?” Then a look of fear crossed her face.

He murmured, “Don’t worry. She’s not here for me.”
Hey, Zara is safely (and happily) married, so don't you worry.

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“If it’s okay with Caitlyn.” He ran his hand through his hair. “Claire was raped.”

She felt nauseous. “Oh, Jon. Nooo...”
So, will Hannah help Claire to cope with this?

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He’d left the door open and a beautiful black cat with big green eyes entered the room. It jumped up beside Zara. Zara smiled. She remembered these animals and the lovely purring noises that they made.
That's so sweet. Imagine one of those logical, unemotional Kryptonians as a cat-lover.

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He crinkled his nose in frustration. “Oh, okay, Doc.”

She mock fussed at him. “You quit calling me Doc. Caitlyn, you hear?”

Jon winked at her. “Yes, Doc Caitlyn. I will...”
rotflol

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Clark’s eyes twinkled. “~I’ve got some great kids.~” He took a deep breath. “~I wonder just how great a father I am though. Zared - Lord Zar-El - is married because they were expecting a baby. Now I’ve found out that my twin daughters had sexual relations at the age of fifteen.~”

She smiled sympathetically. “~Well, Kal-El, you know that sometimes no matter what you teach your children, they sometimes do things that are contrary to what you have taught them.~”
Yes, Zara sure knows what she's talking about. There was a reason K'al and Rya were married so early...

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K’al nodded. “Ah, yes. I gave him my blessing to marry the Queen of Wheat. For some reason, they seemed quite anxious. I performed the ceremony myself a bit ago.”

Clark started laughing. K’al looked at him curiously.

K’al had not yet seen his mother who was trying hard to keep her composure but was failing miserably. She should be mad at Los for such a deception, but she could only think of how mad K’al was going to be when he found out that, as the humans said, Los had ‘pulled the wool over his eyes’.
[Linked Image] [Linked Image]
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“I’m going to go deal with Edrika.”

She raised up, and with a sudden and unexpected flare of jealousy, she exclaimed disgustedly, *Edrika*?! You mean *she’s* here, *too*?”
Yep! She's there. Happy dealings!


The only known quantity that moves faster than
light is the office grapevine. (from Nan's fabulous Home series)
#37713 01/23/07 01:20 PM
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 2,687
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Sorry it took me forever to get here...

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She sighed. “Anymore signs? Increased appetite? Tender breasts?”

Ben’s mouth opened slightly and he raised an eyebrow. “Tender breasts? Appetite? Hmm...”
I'm not sure how PG my comment is going to come off as... but "tender breasts" - I would totally have seen Ben comment on how they were tender all right. Can you tell what kind of stories I've been writing lately? *lol*

That little bit with Los and Mari - about consumating - that was just plain cute! smile Loved that!!

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“Well, 'abe she tried the Sooberman Founvation? They 'abe scholarshibs for older students.”
huh

Nice part, Nancy! Looking forward to the next.


Superman: Why is it that good villains never die?
Batman: Clark, what the hell are good villains?
=> Superman/Batman: Public Enemies
#37714 01/23/07 03:15 PM
Joined: Jun 2006
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Thanks, Ann, Olympe, and Lara!!


Ah, Ann, I’m so glad you like Chloe and Ben.


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Having to listen to Ben's hero worship of Superman must be a little... frustrating, perhaps?
Yep. I reference her rolling her eyes at Ben thinking her dad was taller than him when he’s only 6’ (177.8 cm) tall. Of course, I had her say that Superman was maybe 6’2” (182.8 cm). (Now you know what you got to post that pic of those excellent boots....)


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Like Maria said, Chloe is too young to play around, that's true.
Yep, but kids don’t always listen to the parents or do the things that they should.


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Right now, I don't feel quite so eager to see more of Los and Mari. I have the feeling that their relationship is a doomed one,
Not doomed, but perhaps not as they wish....


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I don't get very big kicks out of unhappy love stories.
Me either.


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Won't do her much good. Chloe can still come and sweep him off his feet. Beth doesn't know with whom she's messing here...
That’s so true! Love the icon's you are using.


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Increased libido, hmm?
Hmmm.....


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Doesn't Ben know that Clark is a best-selling author? As was/is Lois?
He hasn’t quite realized what that means, and he doesn’t quite realize how much money that can mean for an author of Clark’s caliber. Gives me a little idea....


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A friendly neighbourhood Flying Sprite...
Yep...


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She's eating at super-speed, and Ben doesn't notice anything strange? What is he, galactically stupid? Or as blind as a bat?
Maybe that will hit him later. Right now, it’s the furthest thing from his mind. I used to work with an emergency room doctor who was so used to being in a hurry that he could polish off an entire pizza in way less than five minutes.... It was an amazing thing to watch...


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So, will Hannah help Claire to cope with this?
Perhaps Marilyn can help a little, too.


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“Well, 'abe she tried the Sooberman Founvation? They 'abe scholarshibs for older students.”
Wasn't expecting that - very amusing!!
That’s what happens when your mouth is stuffed full of food.


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She muttered, “Called mittelschmerz.”

“Mitt... what?”
hum.. yeah... mitt what? Sorry, I'm totally and completely lost here.
Mittelschmerz is a German word that means middle pain. It’s used in English to refer to the pain that sometimes occurs with ovulation. It’s mostly used in medical circles, but I’ve heard others use the word. I always thought it was a very interesting word.


Thanks guys!!


~~Even heroes have the right to dream.~~
#37715 01/24/07 11:12 AM
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 151
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Posts: 151
Hi Nancy,

Sorry, I've only now seen the next episode as I've spent most of the last few days running around "like a headless chicken..." and I will be going to bed very happy as it is now just gone 11 pm in England.

Wow, another brilliant part - moving, light hearted and tearful too in different parts and even a mixture of all feelings rolled in to one specific area too.
wave wave

Stuart

PS, what's happened to Los' future grandson - you had him in a couple of parts but we've not heard any more?

#37716 01/25/07 07:36 PM
Joined: Jun 2006
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Thanks, Stuart!!

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I don't know, but it sure does mean that Clark will be buying shares in Costco for the purchasing of nappies/dipers (what ever you call them). What with the Lady Jonna-el, Jenni and Zared's baby, Mari & Los' baby, Chloe & Ben and even Clark and Caitlyn?
Hehe

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Wow - I hope that the family has good waste recycling facilities...
Let's hope.

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It was also nice to see that the other cat got a nice story too.
Knew you'd like that.

The grandson will be back. And the youngest three will get more time, too.


~~Even heroes have the right to dream.~~

Moderated by  Kaylle, SuperBek 

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