from part 2:

"I get a break at 2," Lois told him, standing and gathering her things. "Maybe I'll meet you at the Planet -- assuming there's anything fit to print in the evening edition."

"Okay, then," Clark smiled as he walked her to the door. "It's a date."


I is for Illusions
part 3 (table of contents)
by Pam Jernigan

Lois woke up dazed, her sheets partially kicked off the bed. For a moment, she was confused. It was still dark outside -- why wasn't Clark there? He'd said it was a date...

Slowly, she worked out that it had only been a dream. Clark hadn't really been touching her tenderly, murmuring endearments.

No, of course he wasn't here. Lois sat up in bed, running a hand through her hair. The sense of loss she felt was stronger than ever.

She couldn't go on like this.

Moving slowly, she swung her feet out of bed, grabbed a robe, and moved to the kitchen. This was definitely an occasion for chocolate ice cream. The first few spoonfuls helped her gather herself together.

It was time she admitted it. She, Lois Lane, world champion at repressing emotions, was not going to have any peace until she'd dealt with this. Might as well start by taking stock.

First, there was Superman -- well, her attraction to him -- to deal with. She sighed. It was probably a bad sign that she couldn't tell how he felt about her, or if he felt anything. And when it came right down to it, Lois wasn't sure that anyone *should* date Superman. Maybe he ought to belong to the whole world. Considering that Superman had shown no real interest in dating anyone, it was probably a moot point.

Of course, logic had very little to do with her reaction to him.

Then there was her *other* illogical attraction. Clark. Despite her best efforts, ignoring Clark had not made him go away. No matter how prickly she'd been, he had still been there, being her friend. And though she'd tried not to notice, she had learned that Clark was an incredibly decent guy. She hadn't believed there were any men like him -- or at least not any who could put up with her.

Still, he was a man. Once again, she ran through all the reasons she needed to resist giving in to this attraction. Men couldn't be trusted. Relationships only led to heartbreak when they inevitably failed. And when work relationships soured, things got very ugly.

Only, this time, the familiar mantra wasn't working. Probably because, Lois admitted, if she were being honest, she knew that none of the above applied to Clark. He'd proven he could be trusted. And she already knew how he'd react once they'd slept together. She'd suspected that he had wanted to start a relationship -- but even when she'd practically dumped him, he had still treated her with respect. Did it make any sense to assume that he'd behave worse if they had a real date?

She wanted to find out. The thought slipped out almost before she was aware of it. It wasn't such a terrifying prospect anymore. Deep down, she felt a flicker of hope. Maybe with Clark, things would be different.

Dating him would certainly have some perks. He was gorgeous, of course. She might have a terribly difficult time looking at anything but him -- or keeping her hands to herself -- if she let herself go. It would be a lot more fun than resolutely ignoring him.

He was smart -- he needed to be, to keep up with her -- and fun to talk to. He was good at his job, too, despite his laid-back demeanor. It had taken her a while to adjust to that. He wasn't being sneaky or devious, and he wasn't a wimp, either. He was just... relaxed. Cheerful, too. That used to drive her crazy. As she'd gotten to know him, though, she'd realized that it wasn't at all mean-spirited. He wasn't laughing at her, he was just happy. And he wanted her to be happy, too.

She became aware that she had a goofy smile on her face. She sat up straighter, and stirred her half-melted ice cream. It wasn't like he was perfect or anything.

For a moment, she had a hard time thinking of anything bad about Clark. Well, there was his habit of disappearing at odd moments. Of course, reporters were always in and out of the newsroom; it was their job. Clark, though, would also disappear in the middle of helping her *do* that job. If those were job-related side-trips, it would be news to her. But other than that, she hadn't a clue what he was up to.

Maybe it was something related to his big secret. It seemed ludicrous that Clark could have anything much to hide, but when Wells had mentioned it, he'd looked scared. Really scared. She hadn't tried to find out what he was hiding, yet. Probably because investigating him would mean that she'd have to think about him, and she'd been fighting that tooth and nail.

It felt pretty good to stop fighting.

****

Clark found a deserted alley, landed, and changed back into his business suit. It was only a short walk back to the West River street that he'd been loitering on for the last few hours, apart from a few Superman rescues. The street was lined with small, borderline-seedy businesses -- the Metro Club was the classiest place on the block -- but they let him pretend to window-shop.

Lois had been at the Metro Club for a few hours already. She could handle it on her own, of course. Still, he couldn't resist walking around the neighborhood, listening for any trouble. Just in case.

It was just before two in the afternoon when he heard footsteps coming out of one of the two alleys that ran along both sides of the Metro Club. Not wanting to turn around, he tried to catch a reflection of whoever it was in the shop window. It was Lois. And the trench coat was back, but today it wasn't cinched tight.

He debated whether he should try to catch her attention or not. She seemed excited but not in trouble. There must be something worth printing. He heard her pause, then change direction to cross the street towards him.

She came up behind him, and pretended to be surprised. "Oh, Clark...! What a strange coincidence to meet you here!"

He laughed, smiling at her reflection in the shop window. "Okay, okay, you caught me." He turned to face her, and his eyes widened as he took in the details of her appearance. The coat was only loosely tied, shifting around her as she moved. Underneath it, she was still wearing her skimpy waitress outfit. Well, that was one mystery solved, anyway. When tied tight, the trench coat was very effective concealment.

"Let's just hope I'm the only one who catches you! You need to stay out of sight until it's time to work," she scolded, reaching out to straighten out his tie. "Looks like someone got dressed in a hurry."

"Um, yeah, you could say that," he replied, trying not to react to the feel of her fingers on his chest. After a second, her cheeks flushed and her hands dropped. "But I'm not the only one in a hurry -- what's got you so excited?"

"Oh, Clark, you'll never believe it." Taking a deep breath, she linked arms with him and began walking them down the street, presumably to make eavesdropping more difficult. Clark allowed himself to enjoy the increased body contact as her shoulder bumped his arm. "There was another Metros meeting again today!"

"Did you get inside the room again?"

"Nope, I went one better." She looked smug. "I mean, I think it would have been safe enough; the waitress outfit makes me practically invisible -- no one pays any attention to the help -- but then I do have to worry about drinks, and anyway, it'd look too suspicious if I bribed my way in two days in a row. However... there's a supply closet with some newly-made bullet holes in the wall -- perfect for peeking through."

Clark smiled. "I guess you really are the best."

"Of course," she agreed, smiling broadly. "Anyway, I'll show it to you later, but the *big* thing is what happened in the meeting today. Toni Taylor staged a coup and threw Johnny out!"

"You're kidding!"

"So I'm headed back to the Planet to write it up -- I need to be back in an hour so no one misses me. And then we'll see if there are any follow-ups tonight or tomorrow." She spotted a cab. With practiced ease, she waved and whistled to call the car over. "Do you want to ride with me?"

"Um, Lois..." Clark hated to say anything, but he couldn't let this pass. "I know you're in a hurry, but, ah..." He gestured vaguely towards her chest.

"What?" She looked down at herself, and seemed confused. Then she evidently realized that under her coat, she was still dressed as a Metro Club waitress. She blushed, and pulled the edges of her coat together.

"I just thought you might want to change," Clark explained. "Not that the outfit doesn't look good on you, but, well..."

"Oh. Yeah, I can run back inside and change..." She glanced at her watch, looking worried. She looked back up at him for a moment, chewing her lip, then took a deep breath. She fished her notebook out of her coat pocket and pushed it toward him. He took it, eyebrows lifting in surprise.

"You go ahead, Clark -- there are some names in there that we'll need some more information on, and you can get started on the article."

His eyebrows rose higher. "Me? This is your story, Lois."

"Yeah, and I'll be there to write it, but time is tight here, and anyway, you're my partner, sort of, and you are helping out with the story... oh, just go get started already!" Lois waved him toward the waiting cab. "I'll be there as soon as I can get changed and find another cab."

****

Lois paced back and forth, backstage, calming herself as best she could. People were moving all around her, but no one paid much attention to her. After the previous singer had quit unexpectedly, Lois had gotten a fast promotion from dancer to soloist; they were sure to think she was just having stage fright.

It wasn't stage fright. She was panicking over Clark again. In her own apartment in the middle of the night, the thought of encouraging him was hard enough. In daylight, face-to-face with him, she was discovering new depths of cowardice. She wasn't even sure what she was afraid of -- she had no doubt whatsoever that he was attracted to her. But when she'd been around him today, her stomach had fluttered and her palms had sweat, and her only available conversational styles were brusque professional and blithering idiot. At least Clark was used to her brusque professional mode, and hadn't seemed to notice anything.

Never mind. Right now, she was getting ready for her singing debut, and she should be concentrating on that. She knew the song, but she was still a little nervous about it -- the melodic line was tricky, and the tempo had to be just right. Not that she cared what the audience thought, exactly, but she didn't want to get fired. Not when she was convinced that the answer to the puzzle was here, somewhere.

Lois shook her head. This was still not what she should be thinking about. She was going to be singing a sultry love song, and she ought to try to get in the mood. She closed her eyes, visualizing herself singing, and her imagination automatically produced Superman as her audience. Except it wasn't working -- he looked distant and she felt self-conscious. If it was Clark, on the other hand... mmm, that was much better.

And Clark would be out in the club tonight, watching and hearing her sing. Well, she might not be able to tell him how she felt, not yet, but this would be a fairly safe way to send him some signals.

The stage manager came to guide her out onto the darkened platform, just as the orchestra began playing. Her name was announced, the stage light came on, and she was the focus of way too many eyes at once.

How glad a million laddies, from millionaires to caddies, would be to capture me.

She sang to darkness at first, until her eyes began to adjust to the floodlights.

But you had such persistence, you wore down my resistance. I fell, and it was swell.

As expected, Clark was behind the bar. It was hard to say for sure, but it looked as if he was watching her with rapt appreciation. She smiled, feeling more confident.

You're my big and brave and handsome Romeo. How I won you I shall never ever know.

That much was true, Lois reflected. Actually, a lot of the lines in this song seemed to apply to them.

It's not that you're attractive--

Okay, so that part didn't fit.

But oh, my heart grew active, when you came into view. I've got a crush on you, sweetie-pie. All the day and night-time, hear me sigh.

This was almost getting spooky. She closed her eyes briefly and tried to concentrate only on her performance.

I never had the least notion, that I could fall with so much emotion.

She scanned the room. Good entertainers made eye contact with lots of people in the audience.

Could you coo--

Her voice faltered as she recognized Lex Luthor, sitting right in the middle of the club. From the way he was smiling, she guessed he'd already recognized her.

could you care? For a cunning cottage we could share? The world will pardon my mush, 'cause...

Lois looked back to Clark for reassurance.

I have got a crush -- oh, my baby -- on you.

As the music died away, Lois made herself smile while the audience applauded. As soon as it began to fade, she started walking backwards until she was off-stage.

She needed Clark.

****

Even before Lois left the stage, Clark left the bar, through the kitchen and up the back hallway. Lex Luthor was bad news on his own, in Clark's biased opinion, but when he was getting all chummy with the new head of a crime syndicate, things could get seriously bad. Toni had been rampaging about all evening, incensed by the article about her in the Daily Planet. Clark had no doubt whatsoever that Lex would expose Lois.

Moving only slightly faster than normal human speed, he caught up with her as she was leaving the immediate back stage area. She looked worried, but her expression lightened a bit when she spotted him.

"Lois--"

"Not here. Come on." She grabbed him by the hand and looked around them. Clark didn't think anyone was paying any attention to them; she must have agreed. She led him to a supply closet, closing the door behind them.

"Did you see him?"

"Of course I saw him."

"Get out of here, now. Don't even stop to get your things."

"I don't know, Clark," she whispered, looking conflicted. "He's a friend of mine. I don't think he'd do anything to hurt me..."

"Lois, these people have guns. We can't take that chance."

She frowned at him. "But things are going to break soon, I know they are -- I can't get tossed out now!"

"Lois..." Clark tensed as he heard footsteps approaching. "Someone's coming." He tried to think of a convincing explanation of why they were in here -- kissing her would probably shield them from suspicion, but he was certain she'd kill him if he tried it.

"Are you sure? I don't hear anything..." Lois studied his face for a second, glancing at the door as the footsteps drew nearer and a low murmur of voices could be heard. She took a deep breath, looking scared. Then she kissed him.

The moment her lips touched his, he lost track of everything but her. Her arms came up around his neck as she pressed herself close to him, and his arms, of their own accord, gathered her in. The sequins of her dress felt rough under his hands, compared to the smooth softness of her back. The memories of their night together came crashing back around him, and he grew bolder, deepening the kiss. She clung to him as if she'd never want to leave, and--

"Interesting place for a bartender. Run out of olives?"

It took a moment for Clark to come back to awareness of his surroundings and realize that the closet door was open, with Toni Taylor standing in the entrance. Reluctantly, he lifted his head, breaking the kiss. He couldn't bring himself to let her go altogether, though. Lois tucked her head into his shoulder, breathing heavily.

"Umm, I was... we were..." Clark's eyes widened as he realized that Lex Luthor was standing only a pace behind Toni, and had clearly seen quite a lot. His expression was murderous.

"As I said, Toni -- I've found your leak." Lex's voice was cold enough to freeze lava. "Clark Kent, reporter for the Daily Planet."

Toni shook her head in disappointment. "I have to admit, Charlie, I was hoping for better from you."

Lois recovered her composure and looked up, glaring at Toni and Lex, both.

Lex's lips twisted. "I hadn't wanted to involve you, my dear, but apparently you've made your choice. Toni, may I introduce Clark's ... 'partner' -- Lois Lane, also of the Planet." He gave her one last sneer before turning to stride away.

Toni dropped all pretense of sorrow. "You're both fired. And you'll be hearing from my lawyer. Get out."

****