Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic The Long Road Home Part 4 - Comments

Sorry for the delay. Thanks for reading and commenting, everyone.

Regards,

Rac

Hey Rac,

I've been a bit AWOL, but still following the story avidly. I get the sense that you've just about finished wrapping up the emtional fall-out from the attack, which I like. Clark's going home! It's going to happen...isn't it?

I esp like how Clark is so gloriously humanized here. Everyine sets him up to be some kind of saint, but once you've shoved the stark reality of war in his face, you can see that most of his idealism was really just naivete. Clark's finally taken a good look at himself, and realizes that everyone, including him, has put himself on an absurdly allevated pedestal. He's not the man he thought he was and he's not the man Lois loves. At least in his opinion. Probably that's why he's not overly enthusiastic about facing Lois - how does he look into the eyes of the creature he loves most in the world, knowing that she is loving a lie?

Poor Talan. I wonder what she would say if she knew the real reason Clark was upset? She'd understand, of course, but I'm sure she'd secretly be disappointed. Talan's reasons for loving Clark so deeply are very much like Lois'- after years of being rubbed in the cynical reality of the world, they suddenly meet this man who is the anti-thesis of everything they had learned a man could be. He alone defends their dear, fast fading ideals and nobility - they both start to hero-worship him. And hero-worship is always something that requires a certain dangerous naivete.

I t's strange, but until this chapter I didn't feel much about losing Faral. But that funeral scene really brought it home to me. I notice you didn't mention his family being at the funeral. Why is that?

I love every little glimpse you give us of Jon. I can't wait to find out what'll happen when Clark meets him for the first time. Please don't put it off too long!

I'm curious - once Clark is returned to Earth, will you continue to write about the Krypton story arcs without him? I wonder how you will reconcile this - you put it off once with the whole attack by Rae Et, but you can't do that a second time. I suspect there'd be a riot if you delay Clark any further. At the same time, I don't want to lose sight of Lok Sim and Enza and Zara and Ching.

Another great chapter! Keep 'em coming!
Hasini.

I have been thinking about this chapter all day, Rac. Because it touches on one of the most interesting and also upsetting subjects I know - the morality of killing.

I think that the killing of another person is really a horrible thing, a thing that should be avoided if it is at all possible. To me, the "unnecessary" killing of another person is always a bad thing. This is why I am almost always against the death penalty. If a person can be controlled and rendered harmless through incarceration, then I don't think anything is gained by executing that person. Instead, the surrounding society in general and the people carrying out the execution in particular become harmed by it. Because I do think that any person who has deliberately killed or actively or willingly enabled the killing of another person is in some way morally deformed by that act.

However, as you showed us in your story, Rac, sometimes incarceration is not enough to prevent a dangerous individaul from doing more harm. It was not enough to control Nor by locking him up in a jail. His mother and her followers were able to set in motion a plan to free Nor which in turn led to grievous harm for a lot of people.

Sometimes it is necessary to kill. And it is not always possible to judge how long you should keep giving a person the benefit of the doubt. If Clark had killed Nor sooner, all the death and horror in the recent chapters of your story may not have happened.

However, would it have been right for Clark to kill Nor just to be on the safe side, just because catastrophe might ensue if he didn't kill off his enemy once and for all? Clark doesn't know the future. If he wants to be safe rather than sorry evey time he deals with an enemy, he should really kill all his adversaries. But what sort of man would Clark become if he routinely killed his enemies?

Once I read an abridged version of Robert Louis Stephenson's Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. I'm sure you all remember that Mr. Hyde is Dr. Jekyll's inner demon, whom he releases by taking a drug. The way I remember the story, Mr. Hyde is at first a very short, small, almost dwarf-like man. However, as Dr. Jekyll lets Mr. Hyde out again, allowing him to do more and more evil deeds, Mr. Hyde literally grows. As he does, it becomes harder and harder for Dr. Jekyll to "contain" Mr. Hyde, to maintain his normal persona. Dr. Jekyll begins to spontaneously change into Mr. Hyde. He has used his evil side so much that this aspect of him has grown to the point that it is taking over. Dr. Jekyll has literally become Mr. Hyde.

If Clark were to routinely kill his enemies, in order to make sure they don't cause any problems in the future, he himself would become a ruthless, heartless killer, as bad as any of his enemies. That is why I insist that killing is a bad thing in itself, something that should be avoided as long as it is at all possible.

But sometimes it isn't possible to avoid it. Sometimes you have to kill. And Clark had to kill Nor. He had no choice.

But it is horrible and devastating to see the amount of damage this act of killing has done to Clark. Although he doesn't compare himself with Robert Louis Stephenson's literary characters, he is nevertheless thinking of himself as a sort of Dr. Jekyll, who has let out his own Mr. Hyde only once, but who has nevertheless been taken over by his own inner beast. The way you describe Clark's mental agony, he seems to believe that he has completely lost the good and righteous man that he used to be. He has lost his self-respect. When he spoke so cruelly to Talan, I thought he was a man who despised himself, and therefore he also despised others.

This paragraph is heartbreaking and absolutely chilling:

Clark can't tell anyone about his own agony. He can't say to Tao Scion or Talan, "Look, I hate myself, because I think I have become a monster." Instead he appears to want to literally flee from New Krypton as soon as he can. And then he is going to go straight home to Lois - and dump his inner Mr. Hyde in her lap. Oh, wow. Lois probably needs to see Dr. Friskins a few more times, but the person who is really going to need a shrink is Clark. Or will Lois and the Kents be able to straighten Clark out on their own?

There is also the question of how much Clark really can be straightened out. He can't become "himself" again, I'm sure of it. Can he rise from the ashes as a new, better Clark? Or will he become one of those men who are permanently traumatized by the horrors they lived through while fighting a war?

As usual, this was an amazing chapter. So many other things were great about it...Lok Sim and Enza, the burial of Faral which brought tears to my eyes, and the adorable scene with Lois, Jimmy and Jon.

This is such a great story, Rac. So thoughtful, so philosophical, so charged with pain and despair and hope against all hope.

Ann

First off, there is no denying how well this story has been and is being written. I will admit to admiration for your ability even if you have been investing this tale with a lot of supporting characters I don't really care about. In a very real sense you've 'realized' some of these other characters so well that Lois and Clark have become merely just another couple of characters in this story instead of the focus.

Having said that, I find that I'm interested where you are taking Clark with his 'problem'. As one who has always staunchly supported 'Superman does not kill', I find this tantalizing conundrum. Superman has always maintained that his powers give him such an advantage that there can always be found another way rather than resorting to killing. But Superman ain't on New Krypton. Ordinary fellow, KalEl is. That changes the dynamic.

I'm not surprised by Clark's 'troubles', I just hope they don't drag on ridiculously just to feed the angst of the story. What I was surprised by was Talan's cowerdice in the face of Clark's surly and self-pitying behavior. She understands Clark's fears, but can't get through to him to make him believe that what he did was necessary. Clark isn't going to believe that from her if he can't believe it for himself.

What he does need is for someone to give him a good slap in the head (metaphorically speaking). He needs someone to get mad at him and tell him to snap out of it. Someone to tell him that what ever his 'true' reasons for killing Nor, it doesn't matter. The deed is done, the colony is safer for it and he needs to get over it and move on. I figured that Talan would be the only one strong enough to tell him that.

Unfortunatley you chose to let her 'run away'. Yes, Talan is in love with Kal; but she knows that she will never be more than his friend. He needed her to be the one to 'knock some sense' into him but she didn't. She should have known what he needed.

Of course, this is just my opinion and I assume all is not finished between those two before Clark leaves.

You've got the gentle readers hooked. We've got too much invested in this fic to not hang on to the bitter end, so... keep writing.

Tank (who really can't wait for Clark to get off that god-forsaken rock)

Wow again.

I know, I'm being redundant, but this was so very powerful. What will the review board do to Lok Sim? Will Talan be able to penetrate Clark's defenses before he leaves to return to Earth? If so, will something else happen (like a simple kiss) that will make him feel even more guilty?

So, they can't take him back to Earth. He has to ride a capsule, one which recalls his first journey to Earth as an infant. How ironic. And, at least to his mind, he's not going back as Superman, but as a fraud, a hollow shell of an icon, a poor substitute for the real thing.

I hope we don't have to wait too long for the next chapter, Rac. This is one of my favorite stories ever, and I can hardly wait to find out what happens next, not unlike the old Saturday morning movie serials (which I remember from my very young days of childhood).

Hi!!

Clark has always been so hard on himself. It's funny how he used to maintain that he has to hold himself to stricter standards because of his powers and his uniquness, but now that he has no powers and he's just a regualr man like everyone else on New Krypton he still holds himself to those standards. He hasn't been able to let go of the superman mentality, which is not good b/c on New krypton he's not Superman. He doesn't have all the options available to him to deal with problems the way Superman did. It was a little naive of him to think that he was going to go off to war and never have to face killing someone. I think that the only person who will be able to help him with his feelings that he is not a good person anymore is Lois. He needs to confide in her everything that happened on New Krypton and have her say that she still loves him and that he's still a wonderful, caring man. I suspect that when Clark learns he has a son he may at first feel like he isn't even fit to be a father after what he did.

I'm so excited that he's going home soon. I wonder if being under the yellow sun will help heal some of his scars?

Poor Lois, it must hurt everytime she looks at Jon. I don't know how she's been able to deal with the pain of not knowing if she will ever see Clark again. It's enough to drive a person crazy! I'm glad Dr. Friskin has been able to help her deal with some of her issues. Out of all the L and C stories I've read it's this story where Lois is the strongest I've ever seen her.

I'm so excited for the upcoming things in this story!!!

Thanks for posting!

I don't have a lot of time to comment right now(2:02am here in Silicon Valley), but I want to say how much I continue to be invested in this story. It'll be interesting to see how Clark recovers, given that he has some major Post Traumatic Stress problems, which always seem to involve long and difficult recoveries. PTSD is a recipe for drawn-out angst, regardless of whatever story it may or may not be serving. Poor Tank.

You were posting every weekend for a while, and as a result, I find myself checking many times from Friday through Sunday: "Has she posted yet?" This is better than a Saturday morning serial. But again, NO PRESSURE.

As always another great chapter.

Waiting for more, great job!

PS. YAY Clark is going HOME!

~Liz

Hello everyone,

As usual, I'm thrilled by the very thoughtful and encouraging comments. Thank you all so much for taking the time to read and post feedback.

Hasini, it's good to hear that you're still reading along. Clark is indeed going home soon. That's one secret I let out a long time ago in order to avoid being strung up by the gentle readers. You've touched on a major theme here - what's really at the core of a person? What survives when someone is put through the worst things imaginable? That's what Clark's trying to find out. It's what Talan was trying to help him see and it's what Lois is going to have to learn to deal with.

Hi, Ann. I agree with you on the issues of the ethics of killing. It is a morally deforming act, even when it is justified. Even when it is absolutely necessary. It's why Talan has lived her life a hair's breadth from losing her humanity. It's why grabbing hold of that humanity was so painful and so difficult for her and why it is and will be so painful for Clark.

Tank, it's great to know you're sticking with this, despite your indifference to the eight million supporting characters who've popped up on New Krypton. I hope that Clark and Lois don't just blend into the crowd. Especially going forward, I think this story really is about how you pick up the threads of a life you left behind. When you've faced the darkness within you and you know you can't go back, what lies in store for you? As far as Clark's desperate need of an attitude adjustment, I'm in total agreement.

Thanks for the wonderful comments, Terry. The irony of Clark returning to Earth exactly the same way that he arrived the first time, wasn't lost on me, either. More is coming up soon.

ClarkLovesLois, like Tank, I like writing a really strong Lois. And honestly, I think Tank's Lois is stronger than mine, without ever losing any of her vulnerability or likability. I agree that what she's been through has been extraordinarily trying. As for Clark, when he was invulnerable he had to believe in moral absolutes. Even now that he's vulnerable, it's hard for him to change his perspective. It's one thing to hold other people to a lower standard, but he's always held himself to the highest possible standard of ethics. The ethics of war are very different from the ethics of everyday life, but it's so hard for Clark to accept that.

Simply, thanks for the great feedback. It will indeed be a long road home for Clark. I'm trying not to write angst for angst's sake. I want to honestly and reasonably explore the sorts of things that Clark and Lois would go through as they try to reclaim their life together, but I don't like emotional manipulation and I'm going to try to avoid it.

Thanks for commenting, Liz. More is coming up!

Regards,

Rac