I, too, thought it was a great part!
Lois swung her leg over the ledge, and landed on Clark's balcony. The climb up the building had not been easy; she had needed to use all her creativity and several muscles she was previously unaware of in order to find her way up. The trip to his apartment was even more difficult, and required the use of three taxis and a hastily constructed "hooded ruffian' disguise. These precautions were necessary however. Although most of the reporters swarming around Clark's apartment had gone to cover Superman's press conference, there was still a small number camped out by his front door, and she was not about to give them the satisfaction of seeing her travel to Clark's apartment pick the lock on his front door.
Aaaaaaawwwww!!! Gotta love this Lois!!!
Last night she had decided to support Clark, and she would continue to do so. Her personal feelings could wait.
Aaaawwww!!! *sniffle* I love Lois... but that is hardly news.
Instead, she had spent the whole day in a bit of a daze, trying to piece the Clark Kent puzzle together. Frustrated with herself, she decided to go about her investigation of Clark in the usual way, which always included a little breaking and entering.
Before she could really support Clark, she needed to know that he was still the kind gentle man that she knew. That he had a good reason for what he did. She needed to see his place for what it really was. Not only the home of Clark Kent, Daily Planet reporter, but also the home of Superman, noble extraterrestrial.
I think Lois is giving Clark a little too much benefit of the doubt here. Yes, I quite agree with her that Superman is indeed a noble extraterrestrial, but that doesn't necessarily mean that Clark had a good or noble reason for lying to her.
Then, remembering his testimony last night, she though of how isolating it would be to have to constantly be moving. Building friendships, and then leaving them behind forever, always afraid of waiting too long and being discovered.
How true.
As crazy as it sounded, Superman gave Clark stability. As long as Superman was conspicuously lifting trains and blowing out oil fires somewhere in the city, all suspicion and attention was off Clark.
That's right. And in my opinion, Clark lied to Lois for a somewhat similar reason. As long as he could make her believe Superman and Clark Kent were two different persons, he could fool himself into thinking that he could really
be "just Clark" when he was with her. He could feel almost like a normal human being if the girl he was courting
believed he was just Clark. And for him, it must have been one of his fondest dreams to feel "normal"!
Only his parents knew the truth about him before Diana had publicized his secret. Was that because he felt uncomfortable telling people? Was he secretly ashamed of whom he was? Or was it because he thought it was amusing to fool everyone, including those closest to him? Remembering the strain evident on his face last night, Lois disregarded that theory. Clearly, he was very distressed to be exposed in such a manner. No more understanding than when she entered, Lois sat down by the TV and turned it on.
I think he is a bit ashamed, but even more scared, because he isn't human. I think he is ashamed and scared of what other people will think of him, and I really, really think that he wants to belong and be normal. (Of course, it's absolutely horrible that a person as miraculous and as altruistic as Clark Superman Kent would have to be ashamed of himself and scared of other people's reaction to him!)
Clark had wanted her to be one of these select few. He had said as much last night. It wasn't cruelty, or haughtiness that prevented Clark from telling her the truth, just misguided protectiveness.
I don't believe in the misguided protectiveness at all. He wasn't protecting
her by lying to
her. He needed to protect his secret from the world and from those who would hurt his loved ones, but he didn't need to keep it from his loved ones!
It was late when Clark finally returned to his apartment. He was tired. Not so much physically as mentally. The press conference had lasted ages. He said much the same stuff as in the Daily Planet article. He confirmed Diana's “scoop”, reiterated his reasons for keeping the public in the dark, and made a petition for the press to leave him alone. He even went so far as to cut them a deal. Superman would remain in the public domain. Anything he did while wearing the suit, they could report. He would give them full cooperation. When he was Clark Kent, however, he was to be left alone. He would give no statements, respond to no phone calls, and refuse any pictures. His private life, he asserted, was of no concern and of no importance to the people of Metropolis.
Poor Clark. He so needs his private life, and it's going to be so incredibly hard to get any privacy at all from now on!
There was no recording devices, but what was that…? A human heart beat! Moving as quickly as he could without injuring the intruder, Clark grabbed the mysterious person be her shoulders, and flew them up till their heads were grazing the ceiling. He heard a sleepy yelp, and caught a few solid kicks before he recognized her.
I'm disappointed that he didn't recognize her heartbeat. He can't have spent all that much time listening to it before.
“You lied to me.”
A million excuses flew through his head. He could prevaricate. He could tell her that he had never really directly told her something false; just lead her to certain conclusions. But he remembered his conversation with Mayson today. As much as it had hurt at the time, she was right. There was no Clark Kent as he had presented him. Lois had been partners, friends, and even more with a fictional person. He had lied to her, in thought, words, and action.
I love that he is acknowledging this to himself! And he isn't defending his own actions by telling himself that he was lying to her for her own good.
“I wanted you to accept me for me, not because I was Superman, not because I had all these powers. I wanted us to be together, and committed to each other before I was going to tell you.”
“Wait a minute, Clark. You wanted me to reject you, and then be in a relationship with the other you which is still really you? Do you know how insane that sounds?”
Insane, crazy, loony, certified....
“She was in love with Clark. Or at least she really liked Clark. Clark only, no superpowers, no saving the world, no blue spandex. Just me. That's what I wanted from you Lois. I wanted you to love the regular guy, not the man in the suit.” Lois blushed, and looked embarrassed.
“Clark, look-”
“But what happened, Lois, is that she loved only that part. She couldn't love Superman. As much as I want to be an ordinary guy with an ordinary life, I'm not. That was my mistake Lois. I wanted you to reject the weird part of me, but I forgot that that that part of me is a *part* of *me* and making you chose between the two is a false choice. That was my mistake and I'm sorry. I should have told you sooner. I should have realized that there was more to Superman than a tight suit and a bunch of powers.”
Yes, Clark, you sure should have! But I'm very glad you are admitting this to yourself and to Lois.
“I would start to tell you how much you mean to me. How you've made such a difference in my life ever since I met you.” Clark leaned close to her. He looked directly into her eyes, the connection between the two of them was strengthening. “I would tell you that the closer we've grown, the more I've wanted to tell you something about me. I would say that it's not fair to keep misleading you about me. You deserve to know the truth.”
“Yes?”
“Lois, I love you so much, and love is based on trust. Because of that, I'm trusting you with my life, hoping that you'll accept this part of me, and learn to accept it along with the rest of me.” Lois waited, holding her breath. Clark took a deep breath. “Lois, I'm Superma-” He didn't get a chance to finish his declaration. Lois threw herself across the room, landing her lips on top of his. Clark got a little dizzy.
This is sweet, and I
want Clark and Lois to be together. But unfortunately I don't believe Clark when he is telling Lois how splendid his confession to her would have been. That's easy for him to say now, when she knows already. If it had been possible for him to still keep her in the dark, he might have done so for a long time yet. In the show he proposed to her without telling her about himself, and there are fanfics where he even marries her without telling her who he really is.
All right! I'm glad that Clark has admitted a few things to Lois and to himself. And I'm glad they have declared their love for one another. I so believe in this Lois's love for Clark. Hopefully I will soon believe in this Clark's love for Lois, too! Unfortunately it's not altogether easy to convince me about that, because I have such a hard time reconciling his lies to her with his supposed love for her. But, Beth, I'm probably the only one here who is doubting him!
Ann
P.S. I'm writing this after I've slept on it... and as much as I'm
still doubting his splendid "future confession" to Lois, I have to admit that I very much liked his "present confession" to her. So yes, I must admit that he has done a lot to prove his love for her after all!
