Showering, Clark Kent almost didn’t notice the stealthy sounds of the intruder slipping through his bedroom window. He’d been distracted recently by the death of Mayson, and the strain that had put on his relationship with Lois. It wasn’t any wonder that the sounds of an intruder almost didn’t register until too late.
As it was, the intruder was in his bedroom, and Clark had left his clothing scattered on the bedroom floor. Clark grimaced. He hadn’t been forced to be nude in public since his Borneo days, and it had been embarrassing enough when everyone else was nude as well.
Switching off the shower, Clark grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his middle. It was skimpier than he would have liked; constant use at superspeed had burned all his beach towels to a crisp. He’d intended to get new ones in the morning. It didn’t completely cover his backside, but it would have to do.
Stepping into the relative darkness, Clark grabbed the looming figure and threw him against the bedroom wall. Grabbing a baseball bat from the floor, he switched on a light.
“Scardino?” Clark gaped for a moment. “What are you doing here?”
The agent stared up at him for a moment, then grinned. “I didn’t expect to find you so...wet, Kent.”
“I’d have thought you’d be over at Lois’s right now.” The other agent hadn’t made any secret of his attraction to Lois. It was one of the reasons Clark could barely stand the sight of him.
Slowly rising to his feet, Dan rose slowly to his feet. “I flirt with all the girls. It’s a survival characteristic.”
Frowning, Clark lowered the bat. “Why are you breaking into my apartment? We’re sharing what information we have with you already. I don’t have anything to hide.”
Scardino leered, glancing down at Clark. “I can see that.”
Clark felt himself flush, suddenly uncomfortable. “Uh...why did you say that it was a survival characteristic to flirt with the girls?”
Grinning, Scardino took a step forward. “You know how it is at the agency. Don’t ask, don’t tell.”
Clark felt a sudden urge to jump out the window, but he held his ground. He grinned weakly. “You aren’t going to fool me like that, Scardino. Just explain why you are sneaking into my apartment at this time of night.”
“You haven’t read Mayson’s diary yet, have you?”
Grunting, Clark shook his head. “Lois has it. She said she’d show it to me in the morning.”
In truth, he hadn’t wanted to read it.
“She leaves all the clues in there...”
“To Ressurection?”
Grinning, Dan said, “No. To Clark Kent. She talked about your secret.”
“What?” Clark felt the blood rush from his face. Mayson hadn’t known until the last moments he’d held her in his arms...or had she?
“She had all the clues. You never went beyond kissing...ran away from more blatant invitations than she could count...something about a weekend away? Never very interested in sex, always a snappy dresser, never a hair out of place.”
Stepping sideways, Clark backed out of his bedroom and raised his bat slowly. “So you’re saying...”
“She had you investigated, Kent. It’s all there in black and white. Not one girlfriend in over ten years, and all the dates you had in high school were platonic. At least you wised up and decided to get your partner to help you cover things up.”
“What?”
“Mayson never believed the whole thing with you and your partner for a minute. It was too convenient...she starts to get physically close to you, and you suddenly fall in love with your best friend?”
Speaking slowly, Clark said, “So...you think I’m....”
“I think you are a man’s man, Clark. You don’t have to worry about me, Clark. Take it from me, playing for the other team isn’t all that bad.”
“So you...” Clark stumbled backward slightly and barely caught himself. “What does any of this have to do with you breaking into my apartment?”
The doorbell rang, and Clark glanced back at it gratefully. He started to turn to answer it when he remembered his uncovered rear end.
Moving quickly to the side, he said “Answer the door. I’ve got to get dressed.”
Dan grinned. “Being domestic already, are we?”
Before Clark could reply, he heard the sound of a key in the lock behind him. He turned for a moment, then feeling eyes staring from behind him, he turned again and backed up against the wall.
“Clark, I need to...” Lois opened the door and stared.
“Uh, Lois, this isn’t what it looks like.”
Lois stared at him for a moment, then turned away.
“Are you sure you don’t want to frisk me for weapons?” Scardino said. “Lois’ll get over it. She knows the score.”
Clark stood silently for a moment, counting slowly to ten. Opening his eyes, he said, “I think you have someplace else to be right now.”
Lifting his hands slowly, Scardino said, “You’ve got my number. Call me.”
It was all Clark could manage not to splinter the wood as he slammed the door behind Scardino.
*****************
“I am not now, nor have I ever been gay, Lois, no matter what Scardino thought.” Clark’s voice was firm, though Lois was refusing to look at him. She’d read the diary, just as Scardino had.
“We’ve been working together for almost two years, and you never once made a pass at me.”
“I grew up in Kansas, Lois.” Now wasn’t the time to explain that he was a virgin. That was hardly going to help his case.
“You dress like a GQ model.”
“You picked the suits.” Being dressed by a woman was a sure sign of masculinity, right?
“You never even looked at Cat Grant.” Lois scowled. “I haven’t seen you look at any woman seriously since I’ve known you.”
“Cat wasn’t my type.” Clearing his throat, Clark said, “I did go out with Toni and Mayson.”
“I said seriously, Clark.” Lois shook her head, and said, “You’ve been lying to me for years. You’ve been secretive, you’ve been out of your apartment at all hours of the night when I’ve come by, and you make the dumbest excuses of anybody I’ve ever known.”
“I’ve never had eyes for anyone but you, Lois, from the moment we met.”
“You haven’t done anything more than kiss me, Clark.”
“We’ve been out twice, Lois, and the first time someone else ended up dead. It’s not exactly the sort of thing to make a guy want to make out like a bandit.”
Lois stood, and said, “You still haven’t answered the question about your secrets. Mayson knew you had them, and so do I.”
Sighing, Clark slowly took off his glasses. “Lois...I guess it’s time to come out of the closet...er...phone booth. I’ve been wanting to tell you this for a long time.” Pausing, Clark said, “Lois, I’m not gay. I’m an alien.”
**************
Two days had passed without a word from either of them.
Dan grinned. Clark was a fumbler, a rube. It was almost impossible to prove that something wasn’t true, and the more you protested, the more guilty you looked. By the time he was finished trying to prove that he wasn’t interested in men, Lois would be firmly convinced of the opposite, That would leave the field open for Dan to move in on Lois. Betrayed women tended to be very vulnerable.
Although having her stumble in on him and Clark was inconvenient, it would be a simple matter to convince her that Clark had been trying to seduce him. Clark’s protestations that the opposite was true would seem all the more like lies.
Hearing a knock at the apartment door, Dan opened it, grinning. Most likely it would be Lois, already in tears over his partners betrayal.
A large man in a shiny black leather outfit stood outside the door.
“I heard you were looking for a date.”
Dan blinked. “I think you’ve got the wrong guy.”
“Naw. Spike said to say hello.”
Dan frowned. Wasn’t Spike the name that Clark had used to get into the prison?
“Hey...I think you’ve got the wrong idea.” Dan blustered for a moment. “Look at this shirt. I can barely dress myself, much less..”
“I can help you with that...”
**************
Staring dreamily into Clark’s eyes, Lois said, “That was super.”
“We’re just getting started.” Clark grinned.
Sometimes it was good being a man in love.
