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Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 814
Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 814 |
Well, what did you think? 
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,764
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,764 |
Oh my! Okay - so Joshua isn't evil incarnate. But what happened with Lana?!?! I knew Lisa would figure it out pretty quickly. For some reason I thought she was looking at the skeletons on purpose rather than because she couldn't control it yet. If it weren't for the screaming children and my inability to think, I'd leave more fdk  . Part 13 soon please!!! Carol
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Joined: Dec 2005
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 2,020 |
Her eyes widened as she saw Mr. Kent stepping inside the dining room....he seemed to be wearing boxer shorts and an undershirt and nothing else.  Our Clark would turn so red at this. I hope Lisa tells him. Lisa was in as much danger from the red poison and the green as he was, but her mother wasn’t. He didn’t know her mother; other than one night together and what little time they’d spent together recently, he wasn’t sure he could trust her....He wasn’t ready to tell her mother yet, and he had to convince the girl of that. Tough!  I hope Lisa refuses and tells Lois. He’d promised to be honest with Lois about his relationship with Lisa, and here he was already screwing it up. Yup, digging yourself a grave Clark. =================================== Shayne, Wonderful job, delightful take on things. I do understand that your Clark is going to be an idiot and mess things up even worse with Lois. I even understand why you are doing it. Oh well, lots of pain coming. But I do look forward to "Mad Dog Lane". But somehow I think MDL the Mother is going to make MDL the reporter look mild and calm.
Framework4
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 1,441 Likes: 1
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 1,441 Likes: 1 |
Yay for Joshua the Good (I think)  This was a welcome surprise. Lisa figured it out... super Hmmm, just one more thing to blame the character Lana for :p I can't decide if I want Clark to take a leap of faith and admit to Lois or if Lois should self-discover CK=S....  looking fwd to the plot thickening... especially what happened with Lana. I am guessing that she hurt him emotionally as well as kryptonitically   Especially love the small logical things about Kryptonians in your stories, like the diffferent degrees of X-ray vision, or a Kryptonian's dense structure is not as easy to penetrate as a human's with X-rays... 
If she had to move heaven and Earth, perhaps come back to haunt Perry and explain the story after they'd killed her, she would do it.
Waking a Miracle by Aria
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 910
Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 910 |
Ooh, I had wondered how Joshua would be evil so quickly. I'm happy that he's not and like everyone, I'm curious about Lana and what she did to Clark. This continues excellently and is so exciting. Thanks Shayne and keep bringing the pain It makes me feel I've earned the happy ending! alcyone
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797 |
So I was totally wrong about Joshua, eh?
Joshua Lang. Yep, Lana is definitely involved in this whole story, in a bad way.
Poor Lisa. For a while she saw everyone as skeletons. Everyone except Mr Kent, who turned out to be her father.
As usual, I don't like the fact that Clark is keeping his double identity a secret from Lois. Will he dare to come clean with her, or will she figure it out herself? Or will Lisa tell her?
This remains as totally fascinating as ever, Shayne!
Ann
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3 |
Don't worry about being wrong, Ann. I was even farther off-base than you were. Shows you just how smart I'm not.
I do disagree, however, with the thought that Clark needs to tell Lois the secret right now. He needs to learn to trust her first. Yes, we know that Lois is trustworthy - or would this be too big a temptation for her to resist? She could sell the story of Superman's love child to any paper in the world, and then go on the talk show circuit and clean up. The tell-all book would be an instant best-seller, and publishers would clobber each other for the rights to it. Hollywood producers would think seriously about killing each other for the film rights. Money would never again be a problem for her.
Of course that probably wouldn't be the best thing for Lisa, but she could justify it by insisting that she's only providing for Lisa's future.
This Lois doesn't seem to me to be a person who would do such a thing, but years of scrimping and saving and eating cold Spam for dinner would definitely have an effect on her. I think he should tell her soon - I don't see how he can avoid it, really - but in this story the question is a different one from the usual "tell/don't tell" debate.
And I'm also mighty curious about what happened with/to Lana! Clark feels betrayed, but is that actually what happened? And is Joshua Lang related to Lana in some way? Is his wheelchair-bound condition related to whatever happened with Lana? Is he with Clark because he feels guilty about something? Or because of Clark's guilt? Shayne, what happened? Quit teasing the animals!
Both Clark and Lois are carrying some pretty bulky emotional baggage in this story, Shayne, and it appears that they both need some help in putting it down. Here's hoping they find that commong ground pretty soon.
Of course, the journey will be most entertaining with you writing it.
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,578 Likes: 10
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,578 Likes: 10 |
This story gets better and better. I'm relieved Joshua isn't evil (I guess). I knew Clark couldn't keep his secret from his super daughter. But how much time is he going to keep his secret from Lois? She is smart, probably she'll realize Lisa's hiding something from her. And what happened with that Lana? Even when she isn't in the story anymore, she keeps on creating problem. Evil woman.  Next part, please!!!!  Andreia
"My wife's love is what unites Krypton and Earth in my heart. Without it, without her, I truly would be in hell."
~ Superman: Man of Tomorrow #15
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 1,363
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 1,363 |
Shayne! Absolutely fabulous! Though the actual direction that the plot took did not surprise me, you were still able to keep me on the edge of my seat. “It’s ruby,” the skeleton called Joshua said. Its voice was hesitant. “I used to make these with something else, but I didn’t know it was bad for people.”
“Why would you give me something like this?” Lisa asked, trying to push her disappointment away. In her experience, men didn’t give young girls jewelry without wanting something in return. The things she’d seen and heard were proof of that.
“It’s my way of saying I’m sorry,” Joshua’s voice became serious. “I hurt a lot of people with those bracelets, and I can’t really do much to help them, although I’m trying.” Oh thank God that Joshua is not evil. Now that did surprise me. I was starting to worry about his relationship with Clark, wonder if he would betray him. Lisa felt a breeze at her back and she realized that her mother had returned. Turning, she saw the familiar shape of her mother’s skeleton, delicate and petite. In the past few months she’d gotten to know the look of it well, and now it looked as different from everyone else’s skeleton as her mother herself did.
Blinking, Lisa fought to keep her jaw from dropping. Her father didn’t look like a skeleton at all! He looked the same as when she saw him last, including his costume, except that she couldn’t see his cape.
She could hear it whipping in the wind, which meant that it was as invisible as the walls of the house.
She turned to Joshua, who was still a skeleton. “Thank you for this.”
Glancing around, Lisa could see skeletons working in the kitchen, out in the garage, and a few cleaning in various parts of the mansion. Some were on the second floor, which gave them the curious appearance of being suspended in mid air.
When her sight was like this, Lisa had to be very careful. She was effectively blind and would tend to run into walls and doors if she wasn’t careful. Luckily, she’d had a lot of experience faking it. I thought that the skeleton was Lisa's description of Joshua. I didn't realize that she actually was seeing skeletons because she could not control her xray vision. Lisa heard the sound of someone coming in from the other room. Her eyes widened as she saw Mr. Kent stepping inside the dining room.
Unlike the others, he was not a skeleton. Instead he seemed to be wearing boxer shorts and an undershirt and nothing else.
Lisa frowned. Usually, when her vision went strange, it saw everyone the same way. Everyone was a skeleton, everyone was nude, or everyone was a collection of floating intestines. It didn’t work one way for one person and another way for another.
He looked at her and then looked away. Lisa knew she probably was staring, and it was probably rude, but she couldn’t help herself.
There was a familiar smell in the room; fish and oil. It was fainter than it had been before, now being covered with the smell of soap and shampoo, but it was there. Lisa looked around wildly. Was her father going to join them all for dinner? Well, Clark, Superman wont be just your secret for long. Lisa stiffened as she realized she was hearing something else. A familiar heartbeat, faster than anything human was in the room with them.
Was invisibility going to be one of her powers? Why was her father spying on them? They’d be happy to have a meal with him.
“Kal El had to help with a dam that collapsed in China,” Mr. Kent said. There was a strange sound of pride in his voice. “He saved two thousand villagers and helped divert waters that would have destroyed their homes.”
Lisa turned her head. If she could only pinpoint the sound, she’d be able to find out where her father was hiding.
The sound was coming from Mr. Kent’s part of the room, which would make sense. Lisa hadn’t heard it until he’d come into the room. Her father must have slipped in behind him. Lisa! Mr. Kent is your father...Superman! Lisa didn’t hear the reply. She stiffened as she realized that the sound of the heartbeat wasn’t just coming from near Mr. Kent. It was coming from Mr. Kent himself. The look of realization and shock on his daughter’s face was an unwelcome addition to the meal. He’d hoped to be able to keep his secret for at least a while longer, but given the senses that they obviously shared, it wouldn’t have lasted forever.
It hadn’t lasted more than a few hours, and Clark suspected that if he hadn’t had to leave, the disguise wouldn’t have lasted more than a few minutes.
“Don’t tell your mother,” he murmured under his breath. Although the words would have been inaudible to a normal listened, Lisa clearly heard them. The look of doubt on her face prompted him to say, “I’ll explain later.” Busted! I knew that Lisa would figure it out! Now will she tell Lois. I could see her getting really mad at Clark for this because Lois sacrificed a lot for Lisa through her growth and I think Lisa realizes that. Damn. He’d promised to be honest with Lois about his relationship with Lisa, and here he was already screwing it up.
But he had his reasons. After what had happened before, he wasn’t going to share his secret with anyone who didn’t already know it. It was too easy for people to take advantage. It was too easy for him to get hurt.
Now it was even more imperative that he keep his secret. Before, he could have always flown away. If he’d been found out, there was enough money in secret accounts in the Caymans and in Switzerland for him to live in luxury for the rest of his life.
But Lisa couldn’t fly, and she was emotionally attached to her mother, who was even more vulnerable. It would be very easy for someone to use Lois to get Lisa. He’d told the truth when he’d told Lois that her safety was his highest priority.
Lisa was in as much danger from the red poison and the green as he was, but her mother wasn’t. He didn’t know her mother; other than one night together and what little time they’d spent together recently, he wasn’t sure he could trust her.
He’d been betrayed in the worst way a man could be betrayed, and sometimes he wondered if it was always going to leave a scar on his soul.
He and Lisa were going to have to have a serious talk. He wasn’t ready to tell her mother yet, and he had to convince the girl of that. Okay, Clark. As long as you're being honest with yourself. You have sex with Lois and find out that she has your child but wont tell her that you're that alien from another planet. If anyone could be trusted with his secret it's Lois because she has her daughter to consider if she revealed that information. Way to keep Lois's trust. What had happened with Lana could never happen again. I am curious to find out what happened with Lana. How did that little hussy betray him? Oh, Shayne you are evil to leave us there. But you'll hurry back, right, so we don't have to send the Marines in after you? ~Sheila
I'm a firm believer in the fact that God doesn't put any more on us than we can bear. He does however make us come to Jesus every so often.
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,578 Likes: 10
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,578 Likes: 10 |
"My wife's love is what unites Krypton and Earth in my heart. Without it, without her, I truly would be in hell."
~ Superman: Man of Tomorrow #15
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 124
Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 124 |
I second Ultra Woman's motion. More soon, please. Really loving this story, Shayne! You got us with Joshua. Nice misdirection there. And the view of the world we're getting through Lisa's eyes is creepily awesome.  -- Lauren
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