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#48064 11/10/07 07:04 AM
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alcyone Offline OP
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I really enjoyed this beginning. I could visualize the bedlam of the burnt building and the managers and technicians along with the doctors.

Quote
half of the STAR Labs building was now just a charred ruin, eerily standing out against the orange glow of Metropolis' night sky.
That image of the remains was really great

I can't wait to see where you go with this. Part of me was holding out for a more ambiguous portrayal of Luthor, but I got the feeling Clark went from the frying pan into the fire. At least when he was held captive he wasn't forced to do anything morally suspect, something tells me he might not be so lucky with Luthor.

And of course I can't wait until he gets to meet Lois. I would imagine after all he's been through that she would be more open than he would be. It'd be a nice change for her to be drawn to him first.

Wonderful! I'll be reading!

alcyone


One loses so many laughs by not laughing at oneself - Sara Jeannette Duncan
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#48065 11/10/07 08:17 AM
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Oh, I love this story so far! And I'm so curious to find out where this is going. Clark working for Lex seems like a very interesting idea, and maybe that's how he and Lois will meet as she's trying to score an interview. Or maybe something completely different happens. I'm looking forward to more!!

#48066 11/10/07 08:31 AM
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Merriwether
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What a unique and fascinating idea! I love it. I love it especially because it is venturing into the unknown. Not only do we have a Clark with completely different experiences than any other, but in a situation that hasn't really been explored as well. I can't wait to see where your muse takes you.


I think, therefore, I get bananas.

When in doubt, think about time travel conundrums. You'll confuse yourself so you can forget what you were in doubt about.

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I don't know and I don't care one way or the other.
#48067 11/10/07 11:19 AM
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This story really captures my imagination. What sort of person is Clark without his parents as his moral centre? How is he going to get away from Lex? What will his relationship with Lois be like because she will know about him right from the very beginning?

In my imagination, Clark escapes to respond to a help call and meets lois!


Lois: Clark, you don't have to be embarrassed. That's what friends are for. Just tell me how much.
Clark: Lois, I want you to go out with me!
#48068 11/10/07 03:34 PM
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ohhhhh... Like they say, "There are no new stories, just new angles."

I really like this one!!


Here…poke that.
#48069 11/10/07 07:57 PM
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Oh, poor Clark! Well, you know, if an alien spaceship carrying a baby really had landed on the Earth, this is what most likely would have happened. Representatives of the government and/or the military, possibly working relatively unsupervised, would have gotten hold of the alien baby and kept "it" locked up for studying.

And it sure makes sense that someone like Lex Luthor would learn about the alien's existence and kidnap "it" to use for his own evil means!

Let's just hope that the soulmateship is there even between this Clark and this Lois. Let's hope they meet, and let's hope she can save him!

What a great promise, Alisha!

Ann

#48070 11/10/07 08:09 PM
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I love this story. It is interigued me.
Clark meet Luthor first than Lois is interesting.

I'm interested in Clark is wary Luthor.
I think he is naive and skeptical. So I don't think he willingly works for Luthor.

I love to read afterwards very much.

#48071 11/14/07 07:49 AM
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Hey guys, thanks for the feedback!

I'm glad it seems to have captured your imaginations so far, and I'm really enjoying reading all your guesses as to what's going to happen - although, if you want to know if you're right, you're going to have to carry on reading! (Alisha laughs evily devil )

I'll try to get the next part up in a few days, I'm hoping to post at least a part a week, maybe two depending on how busy real life keeps me (and what mood my muse is in - sometimes she sleeps for days and leaves me tearing my hair out as I try to get things done without her help. It's not pretty.)

#48072 11/14/07 05:16 PM
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Alisha,

This is awesome. I only got to skim through it so far but I will be back!

And you have a gift for description.

Cheers, The Little Tornado.


The Little Tornado is ....

....
Marisa Wikramanayake
Freelance Writer & Editor,
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#48073 12/06/07 11:39 AM
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Merriwether
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An intriguing start. I thought that Klein was a little public in the way he handed over his notes. (Let's face it. Bureau 39 is scary and I can just imagine them keeping a close watch on their operatives.) I found your depiction of Clark to be both chilling and believable. Well done.


Elisabeth

#48074 12/16/07 07:47 AM
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Top Banana
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Ok, so this goes way beyond fashionable lateness, but I said I'd read it, and I have! smile1

Nice start, poor Clark. frown

*sniffle*


When Life Gives You Green Velvet Curtains, Make a Green Velvet Dress.
#48075 03/30/08 06:59 AM
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Oh, a story about a nice stern fatherly Lex Luthor. There are so view of them. Perhaps he might even marry Lois somewhere down the road, so the poor boy gets a mother as well. Might led to some Oedipus-like situations, but oh well... huh
(Just joking)

Alisha, this is a nice twist. Wonder what prank Dr. Griffiths pulled. Must have been hard for him to learn that crossing B39 is much worse then crossing Lois Lane.

Michael


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