So here she was, sitting through "Anguish of the Heart." To punish Clark. The two-faced, one-bodied and two-outfitted weasel was going to pay for not trusting her with his secret, even if it killed her. She wished no one ill (except perhaps for her partner) but how she longed for a cry of "Help! Superman!" to rescue *her*.
Oh, my....!!!! Lois had to watch, probably, this:
![[Linked Image]](http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51scJ5ZfWNL._AA280_.jpg)
And then this:
![[Linked Image]](http://us.movies1.yimg.com/movies.yahoo.com/images/hv/photo/movie_pix/twentieth_century_fox/just_my_luck/justmyluck_poster.jpg)
And then this:
![[Linked Image]](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/8/86/Posternotebook.jpg)
And all of it just to punish Clark!!!
For the rare times that there were no new films on either side, Clark allowed his eyes to glaze over and his photographic memory to kick in. He was currently re-reading "Emma" by Jane Austen, with "To Kill a Mockingbird" next on the reading list. Filtering out the sobs of distraught heroines on the screen was simple to a man who'd had to filter out most sounds around him for years.
He's re-reading books using his photographic memory!!! That's
almost cheating, isn't it??? Ah well, Lois, remember the old Swedish saying: If you dig a hole to trap your neighbour, you will fall down in it yourself!
He slid his arm around Lois, having found that she didn't protest when he did so. The human contact seemed necessary to keep her sane through the film, or at least awake.
Aaawww...
Having found his voice, he said, "Nice costume, Lois! Now I know what you and Mom were planning."
Lois basked in the praise. "Oh, this old thing? Just something we threw together."
Able now to study her more closely, Clark noticed the stylized "J" on her chest. Ah, her chest. All his regrets at the tightness of spandex evaporated.
Adorable!!!
"'J,' Lois? I know you didn't like the name Superwoman, but I thought you'd pick something like Ultra Woman, Speed Demon or the like."
Lois rolled her eyes. He thought. Tough to tell beneath the blindfold.
"Puh-leez! Ultra Woman? Superwoman is too derivative, but Ultra Woman?" She mimicked gagging. "The J stands for Justice! You know, Lady Justice? Do you like the blindfold? Conceals my identity, since I've never worn anything like your removable dorky glasses, and Justice fits in nicely with what we do. Truth and justice, all that jazz. You don't lie, except to *me*, so you can be Mr. Truth and I'll handle the *justice*."
Perfect! Perfect! Clark doesn't lie, except to Lois, so he can be Truth, and she can be Justice!
Lois did his spin (should have patented that, he thought) and then slowed. In her hand she held a sword. Where did she get that? He goggled at the sight.
"Um, Lois? I'm not sure you want to use a sword. You already wield a weapon, your pen, when you write -- and you know, 'The pen is mightier than the sword'."
"Cla-- Superman, I'm waaaay ahead of you there. Meet Pen. That's what I've named it. Pretty cool, huh?
Oh, wow! Lois is carrying a sword like Lady Justice does, but Lois's sword is called Pen! (Yes, all those heroic knights of the past carried swords that bore names, didn't they? What was King Arthur's sword called? And Aragorn's from Lord of the Rings?)
"Snicker snack!" Lois said, as she shifted into superspeed. Before Clark could even react, Lois flicked her blade here and there. Imperceptible to the thief, he watched with amazement as Lois used Pen to trim all ten of the thief's fingernails. Bits of nail went flying everywhere.
Yes, Justice can't allow thugs to walk the streets with untidy nails, can she?
There was a knock at the door. "Probably the pizza, Clark. I'll get it," Lois said as she jumped up.
Opening the door, Lois found Lora. The future girl.
"Oh, Ms. Lane! I'm so glad you're here! Utopia is --"
Lois slammed the door in her face.
"Just a door to door salesperson, Clark."
"Lo-is! Did you have to slam the door in their face?"
"Clark, there is no need to encourage these people. Rejection after rejection will force them go out and find a real job, and become productive members of society."
You had me positively rolling on the floor with this! Poor Lora!!! Doesn't she know when to give up?
"Now, no peeking when I spin on the roof, Kent. I caught you looking the other day when we responded to that fire in Gotham City."
Clark sputtered. "Lois, I did no such thing!"
"Did so!"
"I did not!"
"Clark, I saw you!"
"Ha! How did you see me, Lois? That means *you* were looking!"
Lois shook her head. That comment was ridiculous. She would *never* stoop -- well, hardly *ever* stoop --"
Smugly, Lois spun into her Suit and reached for Pen.
She came away with a red boot in her hand. Frowning, she spun again, dropping the boot while reaching once again for Pen.
Now she had the right boot. Darn it, Clark!
'Oh well, might as well use the tools you have,' thought Lois.
Oh, wow!!!!
"Lois, do you have something to tell me?" asked Clark when Lois returned.
Lois looked at a fascinating spot on the Daily Planet wall just past Clark. "What, Clark?"
"After you left, I had to respond to a building collapse in Central City. When I spun, guess what I *didn't* find?"
Lois thought for a moment. "A hideous tie?"
"No."
"Gosh, I can't imagine, Clark. What didn't you find?"
"My boots, Lois! I couldn't find my boots -- I had to help out in my bare feet!"
Barefoot Superman!!!
Lois was indignant. "It's not my fault if you can't keep your stuff on your side of ... of ... wherever it is that stuff goes. I wanted Pen, and instead I got a pair of dirty old boots."
Clark frowned, "And of course, you couldn't just put them back, could you Lois? I hear that would-be gas station robber won't be sitting comfortably for weeks!"
Lois smiled beautifully at him. Darn it. Everything she did, she did beautifully.
"Bruises heal, Clark. I just put the boot to use as best I could imagine. A swift kick may do more than any jail sentence to a crook."
And Lois wielding Clark's boot!!! To teach thugs a lesson!!!
So this is not exactly Lois, and she isn't exactly wielding Clark's boot, but...
![[Linked Image]](http://freepages.genealogy.rootsweb.com/~elkridge/spanking.jpg)
But Clark gave himself away when he and Lois went to the next chick flick!
"Oh, Lois, if you could have seen your face! All these weeks of laundry, grout, chick flicks and shopping have been worth it for that look alone!"
Lois floated slowly toward him. It didn't matter to Clark. He couldn't stop laughing.
"Do you know what I'm going to do to you, Kent?" she asked, pinning him with her gaze.
Clark couldn't even choke out an answer due to laughter as Lois neared. No punishment she devised could ever spoil this moment. He'd beaten Lois at her own game.
What is she going to do to punish him now? What? What?
"LAX, this is LexAir 437 out of Boston, cruising at 30,000 feet. All systems nominal."
"Roger, 437. Good flying -- ETA 3 hours and 17 minutes."
"Roger that, LAX. See you in... What the heck?"
"437, what is it? Do you request assistance?"
"Uh, no, LAX. Must have been ball lightning. Startled me for a moment."
"Glad to hear there's no trouble, 437. See you. Over and out."
Captain McKenzie wiped his brow. He had a good job, great benefits, and he loved flying. Was he going to jeopardize all that by saying that he'd seen a man and woman kissing 30,000 feet in the air?
Adorable!! Adorable!! Adorable!! This fic is so funny, so sweet, so waffy, so delightfully absurd, so
aaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwww!!!!!!! Ann
