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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,846
Pulitzer
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OP
Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,846 |
Hi, Great part! His son’s flat tone startled him. “Us? Who is us?”
The shower shut off at that moment. “Lois and I went to a lab to – “
“Lois!” he burst out. “Lois Lane? You mean she’s here and – Clark, who was in the shower?”
“Lois was. She was as dirty as I still am.”
“Dirty? Your clothes are a disaster!” He took it well. As he rounded the corner, he was shocked to see Lois and his dad laughing together. Lois said, “And then he – ha-ha – he told me to watch out for the rats!”
Jonathan burst out with a big belly laugh, then looked up and saw him. “Clark! Come on in. Lois was just telling me – ha-ha-ha – telling me about that chop shop stakeout you two went on.”
Clark crossed his arms and leaned against the doorjamb. “I’m glad you enjoy my embarrassment so much.”
Maria D. Ferdez. --- Don't like Luthor, unfinished, untitled and crossover story, and people that promises and don't deliver. I'm getting choosy with age. MAF
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Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,864
Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,864 |
Thanks for the long part. Unfortunately, while I thought I had a long time to sit down and read I was interupted so many times that I won't have time for the lengthy feedback it deserves. However, I did want to drop you a line to say I still am enjoying reading your story. Lex' response to Lois loss was touching, to say the least. (Although, based on who he has been in other universes, I still can't say that I like him too much.)
Elisabeth
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797 |
Like Elisabeth, I was really touched by your portrait of Lex in this part. His shcok, horror and grief seemed so genuine. He seemed so deeply shaken and horrified by what had happened to all those victims in general and to Lois in particular. I loved how he comforted and encouraged Rebecca.
Well, for all of his good qualities it is obvious that this Lex must have made some very serious mistakes. We know that Nigel is a bad egg indeed, and Nigel in Lex's second in command. How did Lex and Nigel get involved with each other? And why doesn't Lex see through the Englishman's impeccable façade?
I'm so curious about who it was that Nigel was talking to in the previous chapter. It was a person who spoke to Nigel on the phone and used a device which distorted his (her?) voice. Who was it? And why would this person keep his (her?) identity a secret to Nigel?
It was interesting to compare Lex and Jonathan in this chapter. Lex almost came through as more generous and accepting than Jonathan. Oh, don't worry, Terry, I understand which of these two men is the better one. Still, it was interesting to see Lex elevated far above the moral gutter and Jonathan lowered slightly closer to it.
I was also reminded how good it is that parents don't get to choose who their children will marry in western civilization. And I'm wondering about another thing, too. I take it that Lois and Clark will eventually fall in love in this fic. Is it possible that Clark might decide against marrying Lois if he finds out that his father is definitely against it?
Your story remains fascinating and beautifully written as always.
Ann
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 1,999
Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 1,999 |
Another strong instalment. I really like your writing, Terry, but your characters make me uneasy. Yes, I know this is an altworld, and most likely these differences are intentional, but it still creeps me out to see Lex acting (and I hope it is acting) so 'humane' and Jonathan so close minded.
I guess because it flies in the face of our preconceived notions, that it makes it harder to accept. And one of those notions is that Lana is NOT a wonderful, caring person who Lois doesn't measure up to.
Of course, I'm an incredibly biased Lois person so anything that shines negatively on her I feel the need to rush to her defense. Not that Lois needs defending by anyone.
I'm interested in seeing the further development of Clark as an independant man of his own. It seems that without Lana he's somewhat indecisive, and a bit wishy-washy. He needs to take a few stands for himself. I hope one of those involves who Luthor 'really' is.
Continue to post and I'll continue to read. Deal?
Tank (who really hopes that Luthor doesn't turn out to actually be a 'good' guy, which might be an interesting twist, but too much to take)
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Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 700
Columnist
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Columnist
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 700 |
Very nice part, Terry.
I'm glad that Jonathan likes Lois now, even though she's not "as good" as Lana.
This brings up an interesting point though. So far, Lois has constantly been compared to Lana. It's like that her suitability for Clark is dependent on how much she and Lana are alike. In order for people to accept her, she needs to be valued for her own characteristics, not just those she shares with Lana
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