I, too, really enjoyed this story!
The opening is not the strongest part of the fic. Sometimes it is better to give the reader a clearer hint, right from the beginning, where this story is going. Maybe you should try to mention Clark's odd behaviour even sooner?
"Jimmy!" she called. "Give me a hand getting her to the conference room so she can sit down. She just revved."
Wow! Now
that is original.
Revved? I'd revved? What did that mean?
I'm as confused as she is, and I'm certainly intrigued!
Jimmy bustled over and propped up my other shoulder and they started helping me across the bullpen to the conference room. As we passed his office Mr. White popped out, looking concerned and asked, "What's the matter? Low blood sugar?"
Jimmy fielded it like it was an everyday occurrence, "She's just going through revelation shock. She'll be fine once she sits down a few minutes and we can explain things."
Wow!!!! Priceless! She just revved!! She's going through revelation shock, figuring out that Clark Kent is Superman, like it was an everyday experience at the Daily Planet!!!
Next thing I know I'm sitting down in the conference room with my legs propped up, holding a cup of coffee with lots of sugar and with Lois and Jimmy are looking at me. Mr. White walked in with a cardboard box wrapped in dull metal foil and closed the door. He took a sheet of paper out of the box and put it in front of me with a pen.
I read the paper. It's headed, "Official Superman's Secret Form." There's an official form for this?
I read the paper: "I [print your name] --------- hereby swear never to reveal Superman's secret to those who don't know without appropriate consideration and review; and under no circumstances to those specified to me as restricted. Sign here: "
Wow!!! The "revvers" have to sign a form promising never to reveal that Superman is Clark Kent! It is
that official!
"Lex, yeah, don't tell him, but there is someone more important not to be told. You must never, ever, ever tell..." she paused for dramatic effect, "...Clark Kent."
What? What? Don't tell
Clark Kent??? It was so strange I didn't even see the oddity for a few seconds. "Wait...don't tell Clark that he's... But he IS. What's to tell him?"
Jimmy broke in, "He doesn't know. It's called a fugue state."
My goodness!! Oh, wow!!!
Lois decided to try to clarify (which was good because it needed a lot of clarifying.) "Clark can't deal with what he is and can do. Clark doesn't know he's Superman and Superman doesn't know he's Clark. They are completely separate minds. It's a form of multiple personality disorder."
I love it!!!
"The psychologist tells us it is a coping method, sealing off parts that are too hard to deal with. So maybe it should be called Multiple Personality Order, it isn't a disorder, it's a good thing. The problem is that the same psychologist says that if confronted with it, Clark's mind could react in one of two ways: It could fuse the two personalities, that would be a good thing. But it could also cause a complete traumatic breakdown, a very bad thing, he could just collapse. The Psych says it is 50% either way, so we don't dare take the risk of telling him."
Oh wow! (Eh...though I have to chime in with the previous feedbacker... isn't Clark surprised to see his Superman suit under his business suit when he gets undressed at night? And how can he shave, when an ordinary razor can't cut his invulnerable beard?
Mr. White took the form and put it in the lead lined box, poking at the forms already in there. "It's been a busy month, I'll have to print more copies of the form. See to it, Olsen." Then he turned to me and shook my hand. "Welcome to the secret." And he walked out, just like this was an everyday of the month occurrence.
I love how this "everyday of the month occurrence" echoes of the "cheese of the month shipment".
A while later Clark came back. I didn't NOT say "Hello, Superman, how was the rescue." I did just what I'm supposed to do. I said "Hi, Clark." And I went back to work.
Small typo here, I think. Two negatives make a positive. It should be "I did NOT say...."
Anyway, this was such a funny, original story! I loved it.
Ann