Chapter Thirty-Six
>>>January 2nd, 10:11 PM
~~~~~
Hi, J. It’s me, Rebecca. (As if anyone else would write in my journal!)
I had dinner with Lois tonight, and she looks great. Her job is going well, her family isn’t any worse, she and her sister spent Christmas together and had lots of fun, she and her dad had lunch together over the weekend and for once didn’t get into a fight, and she’s started talking to her mom on a semi-regular basis. I think her life is pretty much together.
Except when we talked about Mr. Luthor. She doesn’t like to talk about him, not even to me, but I finally got her to admit that she was the one who broke them up, that it was almost all her fault. And she feels really crappy about it, too. She said she wishes she had that one weekend to do all over again.
I told her I felt the same way about the breakup with Clark, that I felt like it was my fault and I wish I’d handled it so differently, but that I don’t want any do-overs in my life. That would devalue the other person in the relationship and make them subject to my desires and whims. Even if I wish things had gone differently with Clark – and I do, I really really do! – I wouldn’t change a minute of my time with him. Whatever we have gone through in our past helps us become the person we are today. I wouldn’t be who I am right now if I hadn’t been through all the heartache and trials, and if I hadn’t been hurt so badly by my parents I might not have been able to stand losing Clark. That’s kind of a tough way to look at life, I guess, but sometimes life is tough and you either get tough right back or you fold up and throw in the towel and that won’t bring Clark back to me, now will it?
She looked thoughtful for a while, then said that she thought I’d made some really good points and she’d think about them for a while. Then we got into some girl talk and I’m not gonna tell you about it, J! So there!
I’m kidding! We talked about clothes, and our jobs, and our other friends, and she told me about Clark and how hard he’s working and how he’s not seeing anyone, and I told her how Mr. Luthor is spending lots more time at the office nowadays and he doesn’t smile quite as much as he used to. I think I gave her some food for thought.
I know she gave me some.
I almost didn’t write this part down. Jimmy said that Clark is so paranoid about it! He’s just sure we’re going to be raided by gangsters and put in cement barrels and dumped into Hobb’s Bay if the wrong people find out what we’ve learned.
I hope he’s just being over-cautious.
Anyway, we – the Dangerous Boys, that is – have managed to trace a series of payments to a Cayman Islands bank, the dates of which coincide with what Lois called “criminal enterprises” taking place, at least within a couple of days. The part that bothers me is that they almost all seem to have come from different LuthorCorp subsidiaries. But we can’t be sure. Jimmy said that the money trail disappears between the origination point and the ending point, and the Cayman Islands banks aren’t so easy to get into. Not as bad as, say, a Swiss bank, but almost as hard as cracking the NSA computers. And none of us are sure we can get anything more definite without tipping off either the banks or the person or persons making the deposits.
It’s not a lot, but it’s more than they had before. But even Clark said it’s not definitive evidence, not enough to take to the police or the DA, and Jimmy said he almost blew a gasket when Jimmy offered to dig deeper. It’s like he’s scared that someone else he cares about is going to die because of this investigation. I guess it’s because of Lana’s death that he’s so nutso on the subject.
Anyway, Clark’s really convinced that we’re in danger on this job, so we’ve halted our efforts and gone back to the master’s project. At least no one’s likely to shoot us over that. Besides, he’s managed to scare me a little about it. Apparently the people they’re going after don’t play for bottle caps and paper clips. So, as of the other day, we’re out of the criminal investigation business.
Good night, J. Sleep well.
Hope I can.
Maybe I’ll dream about Clark.
>>>January 28th, 10:56 AM
Murray Brown was freezing. Why, oh why did he agree to host a press conference outdoors during January? Was he going crazy in his old age? It was twenty-one degrees and getting colder. The wind was picking up. Snow was falling again. He’d stepped in a puddle and his left shoe was soaked and his foot was going numb. And he’d forgotten his fur hat. His ears were growing icicles even as he slapped his arms around trying to keep his circulation moving.
The only thing that made freezing his creaky old bones worthwhile was Ultra Woman’s promise to appear on the platform for the news conference. Her agreement to join the Superman Foundation was quite a feather in his cap.
If only he’d remembered to bring it. Then his ears wouldn’t be freezing off his head.
He glanced at his watch, which he couldn’t read because the crystal was fogged over. It had to be time to start! He couldn’t last much longer.
At least the reporters didn’t have it any better than he did. They were all stomping around like he was, trying to convince themselves that their respective editors actually wanted them to ask questions and file a real story instead of just quoting from the press release.
A sudden ‘whoosh’ behind him made him spin like a top. Ultra Woman stood there in her tightly-fitted uniform with nary a hair out of place, her cape billowing out behind her in the icy breeze, and she looked as comfortable as a politician being inaugurated.
“Mr. Brown, I have arrived.”
He nodded sharply. Despite several casual meetings and numerous invitations to do so, he’d never convinced her to call him Murray. She was still as stiff and formal as she had been the first day he’d met with both her and Superman to discuss bringing her into the Superman Foundation family, as he liked to call it.
“Thanks for coming, Ultra Woman. Let’s get this over with before I f-f-freeze to death.”
“Oh.” She looked surprised. “My apologies. I had forgotten than humans do not tolerate temperature extremes well. Allow me to assist you.”
“Wh-wh-what are you going – to – hey, hey! That feels a lot better! Thanks.”
“A simple application of heat vision, Mr. Brown. Is your left foot now warmer also?”
He wiggled it. “Yeah! Yeah, it feels great! Thanks a lot! How did you – never mind, we have a press conference to finish.” He stepped up to the podium and called out, “Ladies and gentlemen of the press! Ultra Woman has arrived, so let’s get this show on the road.” He reached newly supple fingers inside his coat and pulled out a sheet of paper. “Superman had a prior engagement and couldn’t be here, but he faxed a brief statement to me. I’ll read it now.”
Murray made a show of fluffing the paper. “I quote: ‘Citizens of Metropolis, I join you in welcoming Ultra Woman to the Superman Foundation. She has graciously agreed to allow her likeness, name, and reputation to contribute to the charitable works performed by the Foundation. I know that you will accord her the same great respect that you have shown me. Thank you.’”
He lowered the paper. “As you have heard, Ultra Woman is joining forces with the Superman Foundation to maximize the excellent reputations and the good works done by both herself and Superman. Beginning today, all merchandise with her image or insignia or anything else identified as hers will be licensed and controlled under the same generous auspices which do the same for all Superman merchandise. Now, do you have any questions?”
He picked a shivering blond woman from the shouting crowd. “Ultra Woman, how do you feel about being packaged and sold like Superman?”
Ultra Woman stepped forward hesitantly, then replied, “I am not sure of the meaning of your question, except that I agree that any money made on the sale of my name or my image should go to a charitable foundation of some sort. I also agree with Mr. Brown that a second organization to perform the same functions as the Superman Foundation would be an unnecessary duplication of effort. Since this foundation is already in place, I see no logical reason to form another.” She frowned down at the shivering blond. “And as far as I am aware, no one owns Superman. He is not for sale any more than I am.”
Murray found another reporter. “Hi! Linda King, LNN. Is there any truth at all to the persistent rumors about you and Superman having a romantic relationship?”
Ultra Woman crossed her arms. “There is no such relationship. Superman and I have a mutual respect for each other and a friendly working relationship. I have no romantic interest in him, nor has he any such interest in me. And I will respond to no other questions on that subject at this event.”
Most of the remaining hands went down, but Murray finally found a man whose enthusiasm wasn’t yet frozen solid. “Clark Kent, Daily Planet. Ultra Woman, could I ask you where you learned to speak English?”
She frowned in apparent confusion. “Why do you wish to know this, Mr. Kent? Is my speech unclear or incorrect?”
“No. It’s just that you speak in a more formal and precise manner than most people.”
Her eyes widened and she nodded. “Ah, I see. You wish to discern my origins through more devious means, do you not?” She shook her head. “I am sorry, Mr. Kent. I will not discuss personal matters with the press.”
Murray was starting to feel the cold again. “Any more questions?” No one seemed eager to stay out in the deteriorating weather. “Okay, then, that’s it! Thanks for coming, folks! We’ll see you in the department stores this afternoon. Ultra Woman merchandise will be released at one PM today on the button!”
*****
Superman slipped up beside Ultra Woman as she flew in a wide ellipse over Metropolis. “Good news conference. You came across very well.”
“Thanks. Hey, why the question about my speech patterns?”
He shrugged as well as he could with his arms stretched out in front of him. “I’ve heard some comments about it. There’s a rumor going around that you’re from Europe and you talk like you do because English isn’t your first language.”
She grinned. “Good. If I can point them away from Metropolis by talking like a thesaurus, I will. It’s good camouflage.”
“Yeah, and there’s the other theory.”
“Huh? What other theory?”
He tried not to laugh. “That Superman is a Kryptonian commoner and Ultra Woman is some kind of royalty or nobility and that’s why she talks like she does.”
She didn’t respond. “Lois?” Still no answer. “Okay, Ultra Woman?”
“Ultra Woman does not casually converse with the commoners around her. You must make an appointment with my social secretary, probably for some time next month, assuming you are important enough to be spoken to.”
Stunned, Clark fell behind her as she sped up, but then he heard her laughter trailing back behind her. He sped up to catch her but she did a barrel roll away from him. He followed that maneuver and the next and the next as they danced their aerial ballet over the city.
One of the local UHF stations happened to have a helicopter in the area. The camera operator laughed as she tracked the heroes at play.
The footage went national over the next two days and didn’t do anything to suppress the rumors of romance between them.
>>>February 11th, 11:14 PM
~~~~~
Hey, J. Long time no write.
I’m still bummed about Clark breaking up with me. Carly wants me to get on one of those on-line dating sites where they take your “personality profile” and “match you with your soul-mate” or something equally idiotic. I finally had to tell her straight out that I don’t want to find love that way. I want to meet a human, physical, personal man who’s strong and gentle and caring and who isn’t in competition with me. Do you know how few guys there are in my circle of acquaintances who don’t see me as either competition or as just a chance for a good roll in the hay? Or both?
None, that’s how many. Even the older ones, the ones you’d think would help young scientists just starting out, a lot of them either dismiss me as a flaky little girl or they get scared because they know I’m not going to quit or go away. The few who’re willing to play nice are either near the end of their careers and want me to “carry on their work in their name,” or they’re teachers who’ll never go back to the field.
Oh, well, there are still plenty of stars in the sky. I would have said “fish in the sea” but I don’t like those kinds of cliches. Give me a sky proverb over a water proverb any day. Besides, most fish get eaten by other fish.
I saw Lois on TV yesterday at a news conference. She was asking Superman some questions about a series of home invasions and the three guys he’d caught the night before. Apparently they’d killed some people in their previous job, and Superman had been specifically watching out for them. Lois asked him if he’d thought about being a little less careful with the bad guys, and he told her that it wasn’t his job to judge criminals, just to catch them, that it was society’s job to determine guilt and to exact punishment. And that’s pretty much just how he said it, too.
It looked like it was an ongoing discussion between them, something they’d talked about a lot, but Lois laughed it off when I asked her about it last night. She said the TV cameras made it look more confrontational than it really was.
I wonder.
I also wonder about her relationship with Superman. Of course, none of those news people acted scared of him, just extremely respectful, but Lois was the only one who talked to him like she knew him personally. She was also the only one who was willing to challenge him on that “get tough with the bad guys” question. One of the local TV talking heads standing next to her looked like he almost fainted when Lois asked why Superman didn’t just drop those guys into the middle of the Pacific Ocean, but she didn’t flinch a bit, even when he stared at her like he did, like he was almost insulted.
Oh! I almost forgot to tell you! Our master’s thesis was accepted and approved and it’s due to be published this spring! I just got the news this afternoon! Yay! Even Jimmy got researcher credit, and the dean of the biology department said that he’d speak to the dean of the arts department about getting Jimmy some undergraduate credits for the work he’d done. And Jimmy told me today that he enjoyed the work so much that he wants to go back to college and finish his degree. Great job all around, right?
Night-night, J! We‘ll chat later!
>>>March 15th, 12:04 PM
Lois looked around Mike’s diner and sighed in satisfaction. “Thanks for lunch, Clark. It’s nice to get out of the office during the day and not have to work.”
He nodded. “You sure you’re okay with coming here? I know that you and – “
She held up her hand to stop him. “Please don’t, okay? I will not allow my past stupidity to rob me of the pleasure of your present company.”
He smiled. “That’s pretty good. Mind if I steal it some time?”
She cocked one eyebrow back at him. “Only if you use it on some attractive young lady whom you like very, very much.”
He laughed as Mike’s new waitress set their plates before them. “Here you go, folks, a Chef salad for the lady, and sirloin steak for the gentleman. Would you like another loaf of bread? And may I freshen your drinks?”
Clark smiled at her. Lois saw it and knew that Jolinda, their waitress, would see it as a warm and sincere smile. Only Lois could see its hollow center.
As Jolinda scampered away, Lois whispered, “I think she likes you.”
Clark glared at her over his glasses. “I think she’s trying to get to you through me.”
Lois laughed, knowing that Clark could hear the weariness that no one else could sense. “Then maybe we should flip a coin over her.”
He reached into his pants pocket. “Fine, as long as I flip it. I call heads.”
“Oh, sure, and it’ll come up tails twenty straight times.”
“No. Winner chooses, and I’d choose you for her.”
“Oh, thanks a bunch! You’re so generous with my personal life.”
“Hey, what are friends for, anyway?”
Lois grinned and shook her head, then focused on her salad. By unspoken agreement, they didn’t talk while they ate. Lois mused that an observer might have assumed that they were brother and sister, or that perhaps they didn’t know each other well enough for casual conversation. The observer would have been completely wrong, of course.
By the time Lois put her fork down, Jolinda was back to pour more tea and offer the dessert menu.
Clark smiled and shook his head. “No thanks, Jolinda. I’m full.”
Lois grinned at her and picked up the menu. “I’m not. Let’s see, I think I’ll have the chocolate fudge topped with chocolate ice cream and slathered with chocolate sauce.”
Jolinda’s smile contrasted with the cloud-shrouded late winter glare outside. “Yes, ma’am. Sir, are you sure don’t want something for yourself? Maybe just a little slice of cheesecake?”
Clark leaned back in surrender. “Fine. I’ll have a small bowl of ice cream. What flavors do you have?”
“Chocolate, chocolate chip, mocha chocolate, double-fudge chocolate, chocolate brownie surprise - “
“I’m sensing a theme here. I’ll have a bowl of the regular chocolate.”
Jolinda preened in victory. “Coming right up! You two just make yourselves right at home here.”
As the young woman skittered away on her errand of chocolate, Clark smiled crookedly at Lois. “I guess she doesn’t know who you are.”
Lois shrugged. “Mike’s on vacation and she’s new. Besides, I haven’t been here lately.” She sighed and looked away. “I guess – maybe those memories are pretty strong, after all.”
His voice softened and even with her enhanced hearing she could barely hear him. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry. Really.”
She turned back and gave him a wan smile. “Thank you. There is one thing that could cheer me up, though.”
He leaned closer and asked in all seriousness, “What can I do?”
She licked her lips and said, “You could – you could share my dessert.”
He looked stunned for a moment. Then he started laughing. “Oh, Lois! If you only knew what I thought you were going to say!”
Jolinda materialized with their desserts and smiled even wider. “Here you go! I’ll bring back the check in just a minute. Thanks for having lunch with us!”
Lois turned her attention to the diabetic coma lurking on the plate before her. Once again, she was glad she was invulnerable.
If Clark only knew how much she’d wanted to say the words he’d thought she was going to say. But it wasn’t in the cards for her to love him in that way. She could work with him, help cheer him when he was down, play the superhero beside him in public, but she refused to betray Lana’s memory, or the promise she’d made to a dying woman to guard Superman’s heart.
Sometimes it was pretty easy. And sometimes – like today – it wasn’t easy at all.
>>>March 15th, 5:52 PM
Clark knew it was time to go home, but he was too tired to get up from his desk and leave. And that not only surprised him, it worried him. Superman wasn’t supposed to get that worn down by life’s daily routine.
But he wasn’t Superman. Superman was a role he played, a disguise he wore, another identity he donned to help people and still have a private life as himself. And it was harder than ever to keep both aspects of himself separate lately. He hadn’t had this problem in college, or while Lana was alive. In fact, he realized, he hadn’t had this problem while he’d been dating Rebecca. He wondered why that was, and decided he didn’t have the energy to work on the problem at the moment. He’d think about something else.
Lunch with Lois had been fun. They’d teased each other, relaxed in each other’s company, and they’d had a good time. It was the first really good time he’d had in months. He’d enjoyed his dates with Rebecca, of course, but he’d always kept a part of himself back, kept something in reserve, something he didn’t feel as though he had to hold back when he was with Lois. It was easy to be with her.
But maybe it was a little too easy. The only dangerous moment had come when he’d momentarily forgotten himself and leaned close to her lips. For a fleeting instant, he thought he’d seen something beyond friendship in her eyes, and he almost thought she wanted him to kiss her.
He wouldn’t have argued with her about it. He knew that he cared deeply for Lois. He knew that his feelings could easily develop into something even deeper and much wider if he let them.
But he knew she didn’t want that. He’d caught her at a low point, that was all. She was feeling lonely and unloved and he would have felt terrible if he’d made that particular mistake with her. He’d refused to take advantage of her situation and had pulled back.
He did what he usually did when he began thinking about Lois in a manner that went beyond the strong friendship they’d built. He closed his eyes and imagined Lana standing beside him. He imagined her putting her hand on his shoulder and softly giving him a word of advice.
But this time the words he imagined her saying weren’t the ones he usually imagined. He didn’t imagine that she’d tell him to take his time and relax. He didn’t imagine that she’d tell him to guard his heart, advice his father had given him a number of times.
This time he imagined her saying, “Live your life, Clark. Open your heart.”
His eyes snapped open. Open his heart? What could that mean? What was she saying?
Could Lana mean that he and Lois – that they –
No. His subconscious mind was playing tricks on him. Ever since Lana’s death, he’d lived by the mantra his father had given him – to guard his heart, to keep it safe, to restrain his emotional involvement in the lives of others. Yet he knew that the safer he kept his heart, the closer to himself he held it, the less likely it would be that he might find love again and be loved in turn. And not being loved by Lois – even as a friend – wasn’t something he wanted to think about.
He was still pondering those thoughts when Perry walked out of his office and smiled foxily as he approached Clark’s desk. “Clark? You got any plans tonight, son?”
Clark turned weary eyes and a drawn face to him. “You mean, other than getting a good night’s sleep for a change?”
Perry glanced around and saw only Lois nearby. “You’re really that tired?”
Clark sighed. “Sometimes the grind kind of gets to me.”
“Well, here’s something that should pick up your spirits. I have in my hand two tickets to the kickoff banquet for LuthorCorp’s big Hobb’s Bay revitalization project. I’d like for you and Lois to go.”
Lois appeared behind his shoulder. “Is this a working dinner, Chief?”
Startled, Perry jumped and spun in place. “Great shades of Elvis, young lady, you tryin’ to give me a coronary?”
Instead of smiling back and responding with her own wisecrack, she simply apologized. “I’m sorry, Perry. But why Clark and me? Why not give those tickets to someone who needs the break?”
“Both the professional and the personal break,” Clark chimed in.
Perry took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “It’s my judgment that the two of you need a break. A personal and a professional break. Now I want you to take these tickets and attend this banquet, write up something printworthy for the morning edition, and don’t come in until noon tomorrow. Get some sleep.”
Lois’s jaw dropped. “Tomorrow? You mean this banquet is tonight?”
Clark leaned against his desk and shook his head. “You’ve got to be kidding.”
Perry’s voice firmed and his eyes narrowed. “Hey! See this face? Does this look like my kidding face?”
“But my hair’s a wreck and I don’t have anything to wear!”
“And I need a haircut. My tux would need to be aired out, too, Chief.”
Perry raised his volume. “Take the tickets and go! This is a casual dinner, not a formal affair. You don’t have to dress up. The horsy doovers start at seven-thirty and they serve dinner at eight. The big announcements are supposed to come at nine, so you’ve got plenty of time to get ready.”
Lois would have protested further, but Clark lifted his hand to stop her. “Hold on. I think he really means it.”
She held her breath for a long moment, then let it out and nodded wearily. “Okay. I’ll go see if I have anything suitable for the occasion.”
“Good!” boomed Perry. “And remember, this is a simple, casual dinner with a plain old PR announcement. Don’t overdress and don’t worry about bringing back a Kerth-quality expose. And while you’re at it, see if you can have a little bit of fun.”
“Fun?” Lois snorted. “You do realize that I still have three weeks of Ivory Towers to catch up with, don’t you? My poor VCR is going to wonder where I’ve gone. It could die of loneliness!”
“Nah! It’s got all those Ivory Towers episodes to keep it company.” Clark gathered her with a hand gesture. “Come on, Lois, let’s go be dazzled by the city’s upper crust.”
“Okay,” she growled, “I’ll go, but you can’t make me enjoy myself.”
Clark tried to hold back a smile but couldn’t quite do it. “You mean you don’t want to have fun?” he wailed.
She sent him a brief look of pure evil, then seemed to remember a very similar wail from Clark the night she’d coerced him into going to the party at Rebecca’s, the one where they’d first met the Dangerous Boys. She dissolved into relaxed laughter as she walked beside him all the way to the elevator.
*****
“Having fun yet, Lois?”
She lifted one eyebrow over her now-empty glass. “Sort of. It’s hard to have the usual ‘good time’ at a society party when the host serves ginger ale either straight up or on the rocks.”
Clark grinned. “Hey, I like this. It isn’t often you go to a party and have buffalo wings beside the caviar. Besides, alcohol doesn’t affect you anymore.”
“That’s true, on both counts.” She put her glass down on the nearest utility table. “I’m a little surprised that Cat isn’t here, given the high density of politicians and other celebrities.”
“Maybe Perry thought you needed a night out more than Cat did.”
She sighed. “I guess so. I’d still rather be eating ice cream in front of my TV and feeling sad about the trials and tribulations of the Towers family.”
He gestured with his hands and whined, “What? You don’t like chicken?”
She rolled her eyes. “I do like chicken, Clark, but I don’t like your terrible Yiddish accent. It should sound more like this.”
She hunched her shoulders, squinted her eyes, and squeezed her suddenly squeaky voice into a painfully high register. “What? You don’t like the chick’n?”
Clark laughed and Lois joined him. “You’re right. That was much better than mine.”
“It ought to be. I’ve been practicing long enough. My sister and I used to do that accent when we used our nonsense language with each other. Sometimes we’d – ”
She suddenly became aware of a presence at her elbow. She turned sharply, then smiled warmly at the turbaned man beside her. She pressed her hands together under her chin and bowed at the waist.
“I’m glad to see you, Asabi. It’s been too long.”
He smiled warmly and returned the bow. “I agree heartily, Ms. Lane. The announcement portion of the program is about to begin. May I show you and Mr. Kent to your seats?”
“Sounds good to me. Are you coming, Clark?”
He nodded and bowed his head towards Asabi. “Of course.”
Asabi led them to a long rectangular table just below the dais, in full view of the speaker’s podium. When she hesitated, he leaned close and said, “My apologies. If you are not comfortable at this table, I will shift you to another.”
She took a deep breath and shook her head. “No, that’s okay. I’m sure Lex isn’t going to insult me or embarrass me in front of all these people.”
Asabi smiled brightly again and helped her with her chair. Clark sat across the table from her and set his chin on the backs of his entwined fingers. “You okay, Lois?”
She nodded shortly. “I’ll be fine.” Then she looked past him and lifted both eyebrows. “You, on the other hand, might want to duck under the table right about now.”
“What? Why?”
By the time he’d turned around, Rebecca was standing just behind his left shoulder, nervously playing with the empty chair beside him. “Hi, Clark.”
He lurched awkwardly to his feet. “Uh, hi, Becca. I – I didn’t realize that I was sitting at the wrong table.”
Asabi materialized out of nowhere and pulled Rebecca’s chair out. “You are indeed seated correctly, Mr. Kent. However, if you or the young lady would prefer, I can move one of you to another table.”
They tried to speak at the same time. “That’s really not necessary - “
“I don’t want to put anyone out - “ and then they both clammed up.
Asabi stood behind them, smiling, then finally said, “Very well. The wait staff will bring your tea and choice of sweetener in a few moments. I have other duties to which I must attend. Please, enjoy the evening.”
He bowed himself away from them. Rebecca hesitated, then sat beside Clark, between him and the podium. Clark helped her settle in and then sat down slowly.
She met his gaze and smiled. “How have you been, Clark?”
He shrugged. “Okay, I guess. You?”
“Same old, same old. Hey, we got the thesis on the squid migrations back. It was a big hit with the faculty and it’s going to be published soon. I’m due to receive my master’s degree this May.”
He smiled back. “Jimmy told me. Congratulations to you and to the rest of the Dangerous Boys. Are you going to start your doctoral studies any time soon?”
“I’m due to meet with my advisor the week before the graduation ceremony. I’m not going to worry about it until then.”
“Sounds like a great idea.”
A young woman brought a rolling tray of glasses and moved them above the place settings, then set several small trays of various sweeteners in the middle of the table. As she rolled the tray to the next table, Rebecca said, “So, is there anything new in your life?”
Clark shook his head. “No, not really. Like you said, same old, same old.”
“So this party is the most exciting thing you’ve done so far this year?”
Lois coughed and pretended to choke on her tea. “Sorry,” she wheezed. “Went down the wrong pipe.”
He smiled softly. “Not quite, but it’s close.” He straightened. “I’m a little surprised to see you here. I thought the banquet was to introduce the Hobb’s Bay project.”
“It is. I’m here because I won the drawing.”
“What drawing?”
“The different departments got together and picked one person to attend and represent the whole group.” She pointed to a tall, slender, gray-haired man. “That guy over there talking to Congressman Harrington is Randy LeFleur. He’s the chief of external security. He didn’t want to come, but the other security people all insisted that he was the one most qualified to represent them. So here he is, trying very hard not to be bored.”
“I see,” nodded Clark. “This is kind of a drag for you, then.”
She frowned slightly. “No, not at all. That’s not what I meant. All of us worker bees couldn’t come, but Mr. Luthor wanted to acknowledge every group’s role in the project, so he had each group pick one person. Our department had a drawing last Friday and I won.”
As they spoke, another waiter came by and laid several plates in the middle of the table. Lois turned her attention from the forced niceness between Clark and Rebecca to check out the various offerings laid before her. There were three different varieties of bread, nearly a dozen kinds of condiments, an assortment of sliced cheeses, and a large sampling of cold cuts, all identified by toothpicks with paper labels. The sight was so incongruous that Lois laughed again, and this time she didn’t bother to dissemble.
Clark and Rebecca turned to her as one and gave her a pair of penetrating glares. Clark almost growled, “Are we that funny, Lois?”
“No! It’s just that the menu isn’t what I’d expected from the third richest man in the world. Don’t get me wrong, I like this kind of food, but it’s just not what I thought would be served.”
Rebecca shrugged. “That’s Mr. Luthor for you. Sometimes he just flat fools you. You think he’s about to zig and he zags.”
“He sure zagged tonight.” Lois began making a sandwich, then she looked up at Clark and Rebecca. “You two going to eat or are you just going to watch me?”
Clark suppressed a chortle. “Oh, I suppose I can choke something down. How about you, Becca?”
She relaxed against the back of her chair. “You go ahead. I’ll get something later.”
Rebecca turned in her chair to look at the podium. Clark glanced at Lois, who silently indicated the young redhead with an emphatic nod. Clark frowned in mild confusion, so she repeated the gesture quiklcy leaned in Rebecca’s direction. He still seemed not to get it, so she let go of one side of her sandwich and pointed at Rebecca, accompanied by another sharp nod.
Nearly half of the contents of her sandwich plopped onto her plate. The sound drew Rebecca’s attention, and she chuckled. “Lois, do you want me to get you a bib? Or should I cut that sandwich into smaller pieces for you?”
Her mouth still full, Lois only snarled silently and resumed her chewing. Clark cleared his throat and said, “Rebecca?”
“Yes, Clark?”
“Would you – would you like for me to get you something to drink?”
Coyly, she refrained from glancing at the full glass of tea on the table before her. “Sure,” she answered. “I’ll go with you.”
He smiled and relaxed. “Okay!” He stood and offered her his hand, then seemed to remember his co-worker and friend. “Oh, Lois! Can we – can I bring back something for you?”
“No thanks, I’m good.”
“Okay. Shall we brave the feeding frenzy, Ms. Connors?”
She put on hand on the inside of his elbow. “By all means, Mr. Kent. If we go slow enough, I’ll point out each species on the platters as we pass them.”
Lois was surprised to feel a sharp flutter of something she didn’t want to name as she watched Clark and Rebecca smile at each other. It wasn’t exactly unpleasant, but it wasn’t a good feeling either.
She thought that his laugh was easier and more relaxed than she’d heard in months. She watched them disappear into the fray and sighed with hope. She’s better for him than I am, she told herself. She sighed and turned her attention back to her sandwich.
“Excuse me?”
She nearly jumped out of her chair. Again, her dinner took the brunt of the punishment. This time she sprayed the contents of her sandwich over the table. She looked up and saw a face she hadn’t expected to see so closely on this night.
“Lex! You startled me!”
He looked torn between sincere regret and sincere amusement. “I’m terribly sorry. I assure you that such was not my intention.”
She sighed. “It’s just as well. Two seconds later and I might have choked on it.”
“Then I’m glad I saved you from such a terrible fate.”
She didn’t answer for several awkward moments as she conducted a silent debate with herself. Should I? Shouldn’t I? Is he still interested? Am I? If she’d had a flower in her hands, she would have disassembled it within seconds.
When she didn’t speak after several moments, he put on his formal smile and nodded. “It’s good to see you again, Lois. I hope you enjoy the evening.”
As he turned, she stopped the debate in her head and went for broke. “Lex! Wait, please. I’m sorry.”
He turned to face her again, still wearing the plastic smile. “Yes?”
“Look, I – I’m really sorry.”
He tilted his head quizzically. “For what?”
She sighed again. “For Rio. And for the flight home. I was not a nice person and I’m very sorry for it.”
His expression softened. “Thank you. For what it’s worth, I regret that weekend also. I think that I must have put a great deal of pressure on you, and for that, I am sorry. I assure you that such was not my intention, but still I must surely bear a sizable portion of the blame for what happened between us.”
She opened her mouth to speak again, then changed her mind and pulled out the chair next to her. “Will you sit with me for a minute or two? I have some things I need to tell you.”
He hesitated, then cautiously perched on the edge of the chair beside her. “What do you wish to tell me, Lois?”
She took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and slowly let it out. Without opening her eyes, she said, “I want to tell you that I deeply regret the way I let it end between us. I was tired and heartsick, but that’s no excuse. I was – I was wrong. And I wish – oh, how I wish! – that I could go back again and do things differently.” She opened her eyes and stared directly into the depths of his sea-green orbs. “I made what was probably the worst mistake of my life, and I’d do almost anything if I could make it right.”
Lex ducked his head after a moment, then looked up at her. “Are you saying that you’d like to – to try again? With me?”
She could feel the dampness in her eyes, but she held it back with a monumental effort. “Yes. I know I don’t deserve it. I know you’d have every right to tell me that it’s too late, that you don’t feel the same way, that you don’t trust me any more. And if you tell me ‘no’ I’ll understand.” She reached out and put the tips of her fingers under the tips of his fingers. “But if I could change any one thing that I’ve done in my life, it would be to erase the moment that I hurt whatever it was that we had. I’d fix it and make it better. I’d smooth over every cruel word I spoke to you and thank you for being such a wonderful man to give me another chance, a chance that you have absolutely no obligation to give me.”
He sat rock-still for a moment, then nodded once. “I see. I shall have to think about it.” He blinked once and said, “Very well. I’ve thought about it and I think we should give ourselves another chance.”
“Oh, Lex, I know you’ll have to consider this very – what?”
He grinned and lifted her hands to his lips to kiss them quickly. “If you can remain here until after the announcements, we can discuss this more fully, but at this moment I am convinced that this course of action is exactly the one we should pursue.” He stood, but held on to her left hand. “For my part, I will endeavor to be more patient and more understanding.”
She grinned and sniffed once and flicked away a drop from her cheek. “Yeah. Me too.”
He chortled deep in his throat. “That’s one of the things I’ve always appreciated about you, Lois, your brilliant eloquence.”
They shared a laugh. “Now, I simply must report to the podium. Asabi has planned out this evening in great detail, and I won’t have a free moment until after the question period. But I promise to return to speak with you.” He held her hand closer for a moment. “Assuming, of course, that this is truly what you want also.”
She returned the grasp. “It is.”
He blinked and turned his head away for a moment. “Thank you. I would like to tell you that – no.” He shook his head slightly and ran his thumb across the back of her hand. “We will discuss this when my time is not limited.” He stepped away and let her hand slip gently from his. “Until later, my dear.”
“Yes. Until later.” But not too much later, she chided herself. There was too much to say to leave it until one of them got too tired to listen to the other. And she planned to say it this time.
If she couldn’t love Clark without destroying her conscience, then she’d allow herself to love someone else. And Lex was the best man she knew, other than her best friend Clark.
She glanced over at Clark and Rebecca. They made a cute couple. Maybe they’d end up happy together. She was lucky to have him.
But I’ll clobber her if she makes him unhappy, she thought.
*****
Lois turned her head towards Lex an instant before Clark lifted a longing gaze towards her chair, but all he saw was his best friend smiling towards the smooth man stepping up to the podium.
Clark considered the odd pairing for a moment, then sighed. Intellectually, they were a good match. They both had drive, ambition, and if he were pressed on the issue, he thought that Lex and Lois had similar ethical standards. Maybe he wasn’t ‘The Boss’ they were still chasing half-heartedly. Maybe he was exactly who and what he seemed to be, an incredibly successful but basically honest businessman. Maybe Lois was lucky to have him, especially since she wasn’t open to a relationship with Clark.
He was definitely lucky to have her, and he’d better be aware of that.
I’ll clobber him if he makes her unhappy, he thought.
