My day has gotten crazier
. There's a shock! DH went to go vote and like 10% of our district was there when he got there as the polls opened. There's only like 450-500 people registered in our precinct. Seriously. Am supposed to take all kids [w/ next door neighbors] at 4 before the after work crowd gets there. We'll see... If it's bad then, I'll probably go home and when neighbors get back, leave kids with them and go back myself, but I doubt it'll be too busy at 4.
Anyway fic stuff...
Thanks to the betas, as always...
There's notes that need to go at the beginning of 49 [note the title btw], but I don't want them to so they'll be at the end or in the FDK thread.
In 49 <> denotes Lois' thoughts etc. Do they work? As part of this story that is? More on all that later...
Last time:
Lois
"Hey."
I glanced up, startled, to see Clark leaning against the door jamb. "Hi."
"Get anything done?"
I sighed. "A couple pages on the English paper, but that's about it."
"Still blocked?"
"Yeah." I played with the hem of my shirt. "It's a pretty painful time in my life, but I think if I can get through it and get it on paper, it'll be a good one. Better than like, my first date with Joe or the official version of how we got together or something."
He pointed over his shoulder with his thumb. "Well, dinner's ready. Leftovers from lunch, if you're hungry."
I stood up and headed towards the door. "Sounds good to me."
"And after that..." He sighed. "We need to go find a quiet place to have that talk."
*~*48*~*
~~~~~
Clark
~~~~~
I didn't eat much dinner; I was just too nervous about the rest of the night. I was granted a reprieve, however, when Granny insisted that we play 'Scene It'. A lively game of men versus women ensued. When Dad and I won the first round, Granny demanded a rematch and got it. I certainly wasn't going to protest, not when it delayed telling all to Lois. Mom and Lois did well, but Granny impressed me with her movie knowledge and they trounced us the second game. The tie breaker was postponed until the next night when Lois yawned.
I breathed a silent sigh of relief when Granny suggested Lois go on up to bed. She nodded and headed for the stairs with another big yawn. Granny said her good-byes and gave me a big hug, whispering that I'd 'found a keeper'.
I wanted to avoid my parents but I knew there was no way I was going to be able to.
I went into the living room and flopped back into my seat.
"I like her," Dad told me.
"I'm glad," I said honestly.
"Well, I already knew I liked her," Mom informed us as she picked up the cups and took them to the kitchen.
"You going to tell her tonight?" Dad asked quietly.
I shrugged. "I was planning on it and I told her earlier that there was something I wanted to talk to her about after dinner, but..." I waved a hand vaguely in the direction of the game. "We got sidetracked and I bet she's ready for bed by now."
Just then the shower turned on.
"You're avoiding her." Mom sat next to me and rested her head on my shoulder. "I understand why it's so hard for you. No one understands that better than I do," she reminded me. "But you have to tell her. She's having your baby and she deserves to know."
"I know." She was right; no one knew better than her how hard this was for me, how much was riding on it in so many ways. I sighed. "If she's wide awake after she's done in the shower, I'll tell her tonight. Otherwise, I'll tell her tomorrow."
Mom moved away from me and looked me straight in the eye. "Clark Jerome Kent, don’t you dare keep putting this off so that you can get to Saturday and be like 'oops, sorry Mom, Dad, but the opportunity just never came up'. If you haven't told her yourself by the time I get up Tuesday morning, *I'll* tell her myself and that won't be good for you, young man."
"I believe you." I did.
The water upstairs stopped and we chatted for a few minutes about assorted other things until Lois came down the stairs. She was wearing another of my T-shirts and sweat pants and her hair was still wet from the shower. She paused halfway down for just a minute before she continued down.
"I'm sorry," she said. "I figured you'd all be in bed and I could get a glass of milk."
"I'll get you one," I said, desperate to escape.
She waved me off. "I'm perfectly capable of getting my own glass of milk."
"Go talk to her." Mom gave me one of her looks – the ones I knew should be obeyed regardless of how I felt about it. She stood and Dad did the same. "Good night, Lois," she called. "We'll see you in the morning."
"Good night," Lois hollered back from the kitchen.
I sighed and headed towards the other room.
Here went nothing.
~~~~~
Lois
~~~~~
I'd really hoped that they'd all be gone by the time I was done in the shower. In bed, Idaho, wherever – just anywhere but the living room.
Especially Clark.
The whole 'we need to talk' thing had been weighing on my mind all day, even when I tried not to let it. It was probably a big part of the reason why I hadn't been able to get more work done on my life story, narrative, whatever we were calling it English assignment.
I heard Clark head towards the kitchen as I poured myself a glass of milk, but then he went up the stairs instead. I groaned as footsteps came back down.
"Want to go for a walk?" he asked from behind me.
I shrugged without turning around. "I don't have any shoes," I told him. I'd put socks on when I got dressed, but I wasn't about to walk around a farm in my socks.
"Brought 'em for you, just in case you did. If not, then they're down here for tomorrow."
"Fine." I did want to get a look at the farm – if for no other reason than then I'd know where to go to avoid everyone. I sat at the table and, a minute later, I stood up. "Ready."
Clark grabbed a red folder off the table and we headed for the door. He handed me a light jacket first. "You'll probably want this. It's pretty cool out."
"What about you?" I asked, slipping it on. It had to be Clark's given how big it was on me.
He hesitated before saying, "I'll be fine."
We walked out the door and started towards the barn.
"Will we be able to see anything?" I asked looking at the night, marveling at how many stars I could see.
"The moon's pretty full, so I think you'll be able to see plenty."
We walked past his grandmother's small house and a minute later, reached the barn. He opened the door for me.
"Not a whole lot to see in here right now," he said. "Tractor, some other farm equipment. The horses and cows are all outside right now."
"You have horses?" I asked, almost excited.
"Dad got a couple fairly recently."
"What's up there?" I asked, pointing to a ladder.
"Up there is the hayloft," he said as we kept walking. He grabbed a blanket off a table before we exited the other door a minute later.
He didn't elaborate or offer to show the hayloft to me or explain what the blanket was for, so I just followed him. I figured we were probably going somewhere for this talk of his and we'd want a blanket to sit on.
A few minutes later, we were walking along a small road or path between two fences. We'd passed the pond and on one side of the path there was a field of some crop I didn't recognize and it wasn't really very tall yet, anyway. On the other side was a line of trees.
We walked along for a while. He wasn't saying anything, but stared at the ground in front of him.
I stuck my hands in the pockets of the jacket and wrapped it a little tighter around me. It really was a bit chilly and the wet hair wasn't helping.
We continued walking in silence and some time later, we reached the line of trees in front of us. He turned off the more well-defined path and took my hand.
"You'll want to watch your step here," he told me, walking directly in front of me, using my hand to direct me. "It's a bit more overgrown than it used to be."
I followed him until we reached a small clearing.
"Do you mind if we sit for a bit?" he asked, not looking at me.
"That's fine." I'd expected it.
He spread the blanket out and I took a seat on one side. He sat on the other, about as far away from me as he could.
I wasn't sure when the last time he'd looked at me on this little journey of ours.
He still didn't look at me when he spoke again. "We need to talk."
~~~~~
Clark
~~~~~
The knot in my stomach had been getting bigger and bigger as we walked. I still wasn't sure how I was going to tell her this. If I was going to be able to actually hand her the folder I'd brought with me. If I was going to, somehow, let her know I was a strange visitor from another planet.
"Okay," she said quietly, not looking at me any more than I was looking at her.
I fiddled with the corner of the folder still in my hands. I took a deep breath and plunged in. "First, I want to apologize."
Or maybe I was just a coward and would avoid it as long as I could.
"For what?" she finally asked.
"You're my friend. You've been my friend since you asked me what the hell I was doing in your room and I haven't really been acting like it the last couple of months."
"No," she said slowly. "You haven't, but I don't know that I really have either."
I shook my head. "I'm sure there's plenty of blame to go around – things that both of us have done or not done or whatever – but mostly it's been me. It's hard for you to be a friend or talk or whatever when I'm not there." I sighed. "And I haven't exactly been home much or a font of conversational wizardry when I am."
"Font of conversational wizardry?" I could hear the laughter in her voice.
"It sounded good at the time," I said, shrugging.
"If you say so." I could still hear the underlying amusement.
"Anyway, I'm sorry. I promised you a lot of things when I married you and I haven't done a very good job at any of them."
I could see her shrug out of the corner of my eye. "It's not like either of us really meant it."
"Regardless, I'm going to try to do better to at least be your friend."
"Well, thanks, I guess." She seemed like she wanted to say something. "And I'm sorry for getting us into this mess. If I hadn't suggested we follow Mindy, the woman who would run the mafia, we wouldn't be here."
"True. Have you heard anything from Daniel or Jill about her?" We'd snooped around her dad's house a bit but hadn't found anything.
She shook her head. "No. I told Daniel what we saw when you did. That's the last time I talked to him."
"We'll keep looking," I promised her. "I know you're still worried about your dad."
"I am," she said quietly and I could imagine tears in her eyes.
I sighed. I could let the conversation get sidetracked but that would only prolong the inevitable.
Maybe it was like ripping a Band-aid off. "Here." I shoved the folder her direction.
"What's this?"
"My English paper. I want you to read it."
~~~~~
Lois
~~~~~
I took it from him.
"You want me to read it? I'd rather read it on the computer so I can make edits to it for you."
He shook his head. "No, that's not why I want you to read it, though if you want to edit it for me later, I'd appreciate it."
"Then why?" I asked.
"I told you there was something I needed to tell you that I'd never told anyone before. It's not all in there, but it's a starting point. I don't know how to just say it so..."
"You could always... just say it," I told him.
"I can't," he whispered. "I've never told anyone this. Mom and Dad know, of course, and Chris knew some and I've wondered if Granny suspected, but to just tell someone..."
"Then why are you telling me?" I didn't get it.
"Because it's the right thing to do," he answered.
"Is that the only reason?" I played with the corner of the folder like he had.
He sighed. "No."
When he didn't elaborate, I finally asked, "Then why else?"
"Because my parents don't know the truth about us. Because they think you're having my baby and if you were, it could affect the baby, but you're not so it won't, but they don't know that. Because they're going to stop sending the checks they've been sending if I don't tell you and because if I don't tell you by the time Mom gets up on Tuesday, she's going to tell you and she's going to tan my hide when she's done."
Nice to know he trusted me. I'd saved his life in that snowstorm and he had the nerve to not trust me? I knew I'd screwed up the whole Latislan thing, but surely I'd proven that I was trustworthy at some point.
At least he was being honest with me. That was a step forward. Wasn't it?
~~~~~
Clark
~~~~~
That had to hurt her, but it was the truth.
"I'm sorry," I told her. "I know that's not what you want to hear about why I'm spilling my deepest, darkest secret to you, but it's the truth."
"And you said Lana doesn't know this, whatever 'this' is?" she asked still fingering the folder.
I shook my head. "No."
"You never told her whatever it is that would make your parents practically disown you or whatever if you haven't told me by tomorrow night?"
"No. I would have told her after I asked her to marry me, but since I never did..."
"Ah." She was silent for a minute. "So it wouldn't have affected her decision?"
"I don't know. I guess it's possible that she would have said yes when I proposed in Paris and then changed her mind after I told her, but I don't think so."
"Because she loves you?"
"Yeah," I said.
"Are you afraid that I'll want to leave once I read whatever this is? Is that part of the fear of this?"
"In a way," I said after I thought about it for a minute. "If you do leave, then I can't protect you and the baby from Navance, but even though you are my friend, if you decided you didn't want to spend your life – or the next five years or so of it – with me, it probably wouldn't have the same effect as it would if Lana had decided not to marry me."
"I guess I can understand that."
"So..." I looked around. "Do you have enough light to read?"
She nodded. "I think so. The moon is pretty bright."
"Then would you mind? Please. I don't know how much longer I can deal with the knot in my stomach."
She opened the folder and read the title aloud.
"He Didn't Have to Be: The Story of a Foundling, by Clark Jerome Davis Kent."
*****
TBC
