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Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 2,445
Kerth
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OP
Kerth
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 2,445 |
Unexpected ending, which leaves me with one obvious question - if Earth diseases are deadly to non-superpowered Kryptonians, why would Clark risk visiting Krypton, especially with a human companion? Clark is presumably immune due to his non-superpowered childhood on Earth, but he's got to be carrying all sorts of Earth germs, as does Lois, and on Krypton the natives (who are not super-powered under a red sun) will have no immunity to them. And Lois and Clark will probably have no immunity to any illnesses they encounter on Krypton.
In the series we saw Clark deathly ill with some sort of Kryptonian bug left on the outside of his spaceship, and that had been there for 30-odd years. If he comes into contact with kryptonians carrying really fresh viruses and bacteria he might be dead in a week!
Marcus L. Rowland Forgotten Futures, The Scientific Romance Role Playing Game
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,994 |
Ok, I am glad that she seemed to die happy, but I got to agree with Marcus on the disease angle. Bernie should be having a whole herd of COWS about the possibility. James
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,764
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,764 |
Have I mentioned how much I dislike what Queenie did?
I tried to change her mind...
She didn't listen.
/sigh/ I even offered to make that certain new character in OTOH Italian for her...
Nothin'...
/sigh/ Carol
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3 |
Well.
That was - different.
I'm not sure how to react yet. Clark finds his mother (she finds him, actually), he reconciles with her, she dies in his arms, and now he's going back to Krypton using a few glowing rocks and a sun lamp?
And that's just the end of part ONE???
You have gone over to the dark side!
Oh, and I see that Perry knows "the secret." He has to. Why else would he insist that Clark go to Krypton and take Lois with him? Why else would he refuse Clark's resignation with such force? For a story? Sure, he wants the story of the century, but that can't be the whole reason. He's got to know. He just doesn't want Clark to know that he knows. Besides, this way he has plausible deniability. If Clark and Lois ever decide to bring him in on the secret, he can act surprised.
I'm with Marcus and James on the disease thing. Unless we want to read about a repeat of the Europeans wiping out entire native American villages (by accident, mind you; they didn't know about microorganisms causing disease until the mid-19th century), Bernie had better sterilize Clark and Lois and the inside of the ship like nobody's business. And there better be a ladies' room on board, because Lois will have diarrhea like she's never even thought about before.
I'm glad Lara heard Clark tell her that he loves her before she died. And it seems that this bridge crosses both ways. Maybe the multiple-part thing was why the total part count changed so quickly from the first post to the third or fourth. I'm ready to start on the next part, Queenie. You can send it directly to me so I can admire your characterizations and plot twists. You can put Bernie's grief in part two alongside Clark's. After all, Kal-El isn't the only who who lost someone in this story.
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 2,292
Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 2,292 |
What am I supposed to say but "BLAH!"? And where do Kal-El's father and brother come from? Wasn't it stated in your story that a) his father was Jor-El, who had died already (also said in your story) and b) that Lara didn't have any other children? Right now, I don't know if I'm going to read the sequel.
The only known quantity that moves faster than light is the office grapevine. (from Nan's fabulous Home series)
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 5,797 |
I'm glad that Lara died happy, but for myself I'm not so happy. I would have preferred Larnie and L&C living happily ever after on the Earth! Did I mention, H. G. Wells? the whole 'deadly bacteria kill Lara' thing, even though it makes sense? And the whole 'Lois and Clark go to Krypton' plot bunny! Ann
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Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 652
Columnist
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Columnist
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 652 |
I just reread the entire story and I am not sure how I feel about it now. I feel like we missed to much in the story.
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,994
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,994 |
Originally posted by Lara Joelle Kent: What am I supposed to say but "BLAH!"? And where do Kal-El's father and brother come from? Wasn't it stated in your story that a) his father was Jor-El, who had died already (also said in your story) and b) that Lara didn't have any other children? Right now, I don't know if I'm going to read the sequel. The father and son were sickness/divine/afterlife projections of Jor El and the child she lost. James, who is not too sure of Queenie's sanity, but am willing to give her the benefit of the doubt... James
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 76
Freelance Reporter
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Freelance Reporter
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 76 |
Maybe it's just that I am a sloppy reader, but I don't remember Lara ever mentioning to anyone on Earth (especially to Clark) that if she and Jor-El had kept him on Krypton, the Kryptonian society would have killed him!
The whole story pivots around the knowledge that, far from sending him away to casually discard him, it was actually done to save his life!
If I indeed missed this revelation, could someone point me to the part where it was mentioned?
Thanks, Snave
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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 921
Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 921 |
I can't believe you actually killed Lara! I feel like Clark still had so much to say to her and vice versa.
And I'm a bit stunned that Clark and Lois are going to Krypton, although even more sure now that Perry knows the truth.
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Posts: 1,371 Likes: 1
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 1,371 Likes: 1 |
I don't know. I'm usually pretty hard to please, but I see the necessity of Lara not surviving. I was floored by the father/brother development. I feel like I missed something. Was Lara delusional? Was Clark's dad *not* Jor-El? Very confused. And, to be honest, I'm not super happy about the "off-to-Krypton" idea. I can't believe that Perry actually had to tell him to take Lois. But, I'm having fun with the story. For myself, I'll be right here for part 2. Bob
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Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 2,823
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 2,823 |
Perry knows! (But not officially.)
Re Lara dying and Clark/Lois going to Krypton: everyone else said it much better.
All I can say is, you'd better untie, or tie up, some plot threads in part 2!
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,217
Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,217 |
Part 1? Ok... waiting for part 2 J
"Practice up your shielding spells...and remember to duck if you see green light coming your way." Harry Potter to Wizengamot in OotP trial A Bad Week in the Wizengamot
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Posts: 3,060 Likes: 20
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 3,060 Likes: 20 |
Hi guys! Sorry it took me so long to respond. Thanks so much for reading, for sticking with me, and for posting comments! It means a lot to me. There's a lot I will need to do to make it worth putting here, FoLCs. You're a wonderful audience, and you deserve the best. Thank you.
~•~
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,627
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,627 |
Well this was ridiculously interesting and original! I particularly like your handling of Krypton and its cast of characters, so I will be interested in the next part! JD
"Meg...who let you back in the house?" -Family Guy
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066 Likes: 31
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066 Likes: 31 |
Okay, I so did not expect this. From YOU of all the people. Yeah, Anakin Skywalker. Sure. I mean, it was an open and shut case ever since The Empire Strikes Back. But this? That's... that's... Queenie has gone off the deep end and has joined Jacen Solo For the tidbits: Perry seems to know. How will you solve the disease thing? And your 'no intentional deaths, in fact ': So, Clark is getting his swimmers treated on Krypton, huh? Michael, awaiting part 2.
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Posts: 273
Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 273 |
I liked the whole back story of Krypton. I was really shocked to see you kill Lana off though. And like everyone else here in fdk, I'm dubious of the whole diseases thing. Having said that, I suppose with any alien craft/planet there would always be some form of contamination risk.. sooo.... very interesting. Intrigued to see where you take this... and I'm with Michael on his swimmers comment.
"He's my best friend, best of all best friends Do you have a best friend too It tickles in my tummy He's so Yummy Yummy Hey you should get a best friend too" - Toy Box
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Posts: 8
Blogger
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Blogger
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 8 |
really great story! very intriguing. I did a preliminary search for a sequel without any luck. are you still planning one? is it in the works?!? is it already in existence and unknown to me? hint hint thanks!
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Joined: Feb 2006
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 1,437 |
I'd like to second those questions--is a sequel still in the works? I just finished reading this part, and I'm eager to read the second.
"You take turns, advise and protect one another, even heal or be healed when the going gets too tough. I know! That's not a game--that's friendship!" ~Shelly Mezzanoble, Confessions of a Part-Time Sorceress: A Girl's Guide to the Dungeons & Dragons Game Darcy\'s Place
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