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Kerth
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Kerth
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Feedback here.

Thanks.

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Kerth
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Yay! Another Aussie on these boards hee hee laugh

Great story! So far I haven't caught anything that seems to me to be very Australian, unless we are talking about the fish species, but then I'm not familiar with that enough to say that. I've only ever been fishing in the sea so am a little famililar with salt water fish.

Ok I'm rambling, again welcome and can't wait to read the rest! Nice way to introduce Lois and Clark and Lois' initial thoughts on his looks were funny.

thumbsup


The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched they must be felt with the heart

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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Nice introduction. There's so much potential here, that a three-parter may only be the beginning, but I'm looking forward to see where you take things from here.

With Perry's phone call to Martha, I'm wondering whether he sent Lois off to Smallville for the story, or whether he was doing some match-making? smile

Looking forward to Chapter 2.

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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Great start! I have been chuckling a lot so this could be a lot of fun!

Loved Lois being stuck in nowhereland, meeting Clark, going fishing... laugh

Looking forward to more!

Natascha

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Hmm, that's sweet. I like it. It's nice that Lois meets Clark while she is in his bed and encounters him as 'Mr. Chest', not as Mr. Greenjeans! laugh

Did Clark hurt his thumb because there are low levels of Kryptonite around the farm, or is he simply too strong for his own good? Inquiring minds want to know!

Ann

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I love how different Lois' impressions of Clark are meeting him this way. I can't wait to see how this story goes!

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Kerth
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Kerth
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Quote
Originally posted by TOC:


Did Clark hurt his thumb because there are low levels of Kryptonite around the farm, or is he simply too strong for his own good? Inquiring minds want to know!

Ann
Simply too strong!

I figured no matter how high his pain threshhold, if he was the one holding the hammer, there was a chance it was going to hurt. (I'm also assuming Clark built the barn 'super strong' so it could stand such eventualities!)


Thanks for all the feedback - I really appreciate the encouragement and interest.

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Top Banana
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I found this to be absolutely, positively, delightful! clap

Your presentation of Lois in Smallville feels spot-on. I'm also enjoying Lois in "Hotel Kent." smile

I guess my one big question is why did Perry call Martha? Or was it just because he had remembered getting a resume from Clark and used that as a contact point? confused

Based on this start, I have a feeling that I'm going to be VERY disappointed that there are only 3 parts planned.

Bob

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HA... love seeing 'humour' spelled correctly in the very first line - well for us Aussies anyway!

Just wondering about Clark hurting his thumb with the hammer... how hard did he have to hit himself for that to happen?! goofy

Such a sweet story so far, looking forward to the next installment.


All right... all right... but apart from better sanitation and medicine and education and irrigation and public health and roads and a freshwater system and baths and public order... what have the Romans done for us?
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Pulitzer
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Very interesting premise! I'm a big alternate beginnings and scenes-in-Smallville fan, so I'm looking forward to seeing where this goes!

Great start,
JD


"Meg...who let you back in the house?" -Family Guy
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Kerth
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Kerth
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Quote
Originally posted by bobbart:
I guess my one big question is why did Perry call Martha? Or was it just because he had remembered getting a resume from Clark and used that as a contact point? confused


Bob
In my mind, Perry was grappling with the problem of Lois's accommodation, when he remembered that somewhere - no doubt deep under a pile of papers - he'd buried a resume from an unknown from Smallville. He rang the (home phone) number and got Martha.

Maybe I should have explained it more fully?

The entire story is from either Lois's or Clark's POV and I didn't want to break from that.


Thanks to all for your feedback.

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Top Banana
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Very nice start! You've got me intrigued. Can't wait for the next post!

One question though...How did Perry know to call Martha?

~Sheila


I'm a firm believer in the fact that God doesn't put any more on us than we can bear. He does however make us come to Jesus every so often.
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Pulitzer
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I want to know what happens next. Why is Clark working for the Smallville Press and not the Planet? What is the business of the mysterious Franklin Hodge? Will Trask be involved? Are there rumors of aliens? Will Clark's secret come out? Since they're in Smallville, what about Kryptonite?

Post more soon, please!

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Pulitzer
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Oh so far I like it. Looking forward to more soon. Laura


Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”

Caroline's "Stardust"
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Merriwether
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It was rather nice to find this tidbit of pleasure! I like this encounter and I'm clawing at my mouse - scrolling down - for more while reading.

Well I'd like to race off and find the next part before I fall asleep. It's 1 in the morning and I have to be up at 6...I just can't sleep!

I really like the way Lois is sizing up Clark.


I've converted to lurk-ism... hopefully only temporary.
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oh this is fantastic!! I love this alternate meeting and I love your Clark in this. He's so... sweet smile *runs to next part*


LOIS:I don't like you.
MAYSON: Really? Oh god, that is such a relief - I don't like you either.
LOIS: That makes me feel so much better
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First, I love fresh meat... err, new authors. Secondly, this is awesome. The description of the man that Lois is following is fantastic. I imagine he would be one of the few people she would willingly follow to Smallville.

I also liked the questions Clark asked her. By asking if it would hurt his parents he didn't have to ask if it was about him. Very clever. He realizes he can't let his guard down around him, even though her investigative skills haven't looked that impressive so far.


Elisabeth

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Pulitzer
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It's nice to have new authors and better yet when they debut with a great story. smile1 This alt-beginning looks intriguing and promising. hyper

It's nice that somethings never change, as Lois getting impressed with Clark bare chested. laugh

Andreia (off to read next part)


"My wife's love is what unites Krypton and Earth in my heart. Without it, without her, I truly would be in hell."

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That's a great beginning, FH smile

Lois gets to see the lunkeaded boyscout in his natural habitat smile1


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