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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Well? And yes, I do have ideas how I could spin this into an entire S1 rewrite. But there are several other stories that need to be written first Part 2 / TOC Thanks! Michael
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 470 |
I think you should DEFINITELY continue it. It was very well-written, but I wanted to squawk (like a wild goose) when it ended. I need to see Clark's reaction when he sees the story! I need to see Lois's reaction, when she realizes it's Superman's ship! More, more, more!
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Aug 2005
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As a super-fan of Lois, I'm generally not too happy when Lois is being punished for treating Clark badly, all the more since Clark has, to my recollection, never been punished for treating Lois badly. But, hey! This was so funny! Lois was sent on this horrible wild-goose chase by Clark and it paid off!!! Yeah!!! And Lois went to a phone booth! Double-yay! In the phone booth, Lois reveals herself as the super-sleuth - or at least the super-reporter - that she is!!! (I can almost see her tearing open her smelly clothes, revealing a "super reporter" S shield inside!) “I see you got today's front page?” she began without preamble and no trace of kindness in her voice.
He hung up the phone and turned his attention to Lois. “Don't tell me you've come over to congratulate me?” he asked her without any hopes of a positive answer. Apparently, sending her on a wild-goose chase through the sewer system hadn't turned out to be much of a character-building exercise for her. He's sent her on a wild-goose chase to the Metropolis Sewage Reclamation Plant and expects her to come to him and congratulate him? “What can I say?” She gave him a shrug and a smile that cracked one of the mud-flakes on her cheek. “A reporter has to go where the story takes her. Especially, if it's a big one.”
“Like?” Clark asked, mildly intrigued even as he pondered the irony of how such a beautiful smile could front this viscous an inside.
“Oh, I don't know…” Her eyes sparkled like she was telling a joke, and Clark patiently waited for the punch-line. “For instance, do you remember that warehouse full of U.F.O.s that Trask managed to make disappear before I could write-up the story?”
When his only reaction was a noncommittal "Uh-huh…?' Lois continued with her tale. “Well, they've turned up again, and you can read all about it on tomorrow's front page.”
This time, Clark's eyes grew wide and he wasn't able to suppress a coughing fit even as the blood drained from his face. “Tomorrow's front page?” Should you continue this tale, Michael? Why, of course you should! There's a lot still to be told. For example, where is Trask? And how will Clark react to seeing the picture of his own space ship on the front page of the Daily Planet? Looking forward to more of this! Ann
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 1,194 Likes: 1 |
Yep, Clark tried to give Lois her karmic come-uppance and it backfired.
Add my voice to the 'please continue this story' chorus.
This *is* my happily ever after.
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
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Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”
Caroline's "Stardust"
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Posts: 1,999
Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 1,999 |
Cute story, nice twist.
I think you should continue this story also... at least to the point where Lois goes home and has to cut off and burn her hair when she remembers her encounter with the rat, and the other 'enhancements' her locks had to endure during her romp through the sewers.
Tank (who wonders when Lois will realize that the one small space ship had an 'S' like symbol on the front)
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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I agree with everyone else - please keep a sequel to this story bubbling in your pot'o'fics. Further investigation into this universe is definitely warranted.
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 2,367 |
This sums up Lois so nicely! People, and by people she mainly meant her editor, might call her reckless, but she never took *unnecessary* risks I also enjoyed this: Never had exhaust fumes smelled sweeter. Ha! I also giggled at the bum telling Lois that she smelled. she pulled a tarp off a… weather balloon and took a few commemorative shots. That's right - they're all "weather balloons". Very clever! Poor Clark. Hoisted on his own petard, as it were. Thank you for a story that lets them both score points off the other.
Lois: You know, I have a funny feeling that you didn't tell me your biggest secret.
Clark: Well, just to put your little mind at ease, Lois, you're right. Ides of Metropolis
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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/does goofy happy-dance at FDK/ Thanks, cookiesmoom, that squawk really cracked me up Ha! I also giggled at the bum telling Lois that she smelled. So good to know the line worked. It was one of those little bunnies you just know you have to get in there. Thank you for a story that lets them both score points off the other. You’re very welcome! As for the sequel… Well, since it’s going to be S1 rewrite, it’s going to be a while. Maybe I’ll do a multiparter and mix it up with the other stories. Will see how many requests for the third story of my Wedding Crashers arc (second story to commence posting before the Ficathon deadline) there will be. Aaaanyhow, am loving all the wonderful FDK, guys! And you've just made my weekend! You’re the best Michael
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Joined: Jan 2007
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Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Jan 2007
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Wonderful, Michael, although another evil ending. The stench of various bodily excretions was horrific as it wafted over Lois as soon as she had exchanged the sewers for a back-alley in what looked like Suicide Slum. Really? A back alley in Suicide Slum smells worse than the sewer system? The police inspector tended to take charge of her investigations as soon as she invited him to join into the fun, and she had to make sure he understood that Metropolis’ Finest were merely lending her a hand. This is perfect Lois. “This’ my booth…,” the man slurred back, not moving more than his arm to gesticulate her away. “Go, get cha own…” This is great! Lois, I’m guessing, has forgotten what she smells like and has no clue he thinks she’s a bum, too. Although, this was even better… Once the rag-clothed man had finished leaving the booth, he pulled himself up against the doorframe and eyed Lois through bleary eyes before wrinkling his nose. “You smell, lady…” It reminded her of the script of that one race from Star Trek. The ugly guys with the wild hair; Vulcans, if she remembered correctly. Okay, I need to add my vote on wanting a continuation. I’m imagining that Henderson’s call was somehow to share with Clark the fact that the ship has Superman’s logo and that’s how Lois learns her lesson. But I’m not sure why Henderson would do that. So I need answers…
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Wonderful, Michael, although another evil ending. Thanks, Nancy! And hey, it’s just the second fic I’ve done that actually has an evil ending. And I’m already paying for the first one /nods vigorously about the Lois-bits/ Figured you’d get a kick out of the Star Trek line. I’m imagining that Henderson’s call was somehow to share with Clark the fact that the ship has Superman’s logo and that’s how Lois learns her lesson. But I’m not sure why Henderson would do that. So I need answers… Umm… the premise is, that Lois *doesn’t* learn her lesson So, Henderson calling Clark has probably more to do with avoiding Lois in an attempt to return lost property. Yes, *now* you may call me evil. Michael
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Dec 2008
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Hi Michael Never had exhaust fumes smelled sweeter. Nice line! I loved how Lois dealt with the snooty police receptionist. “You’re not in a plane, are you?” a suddenly very concerned voice interjected. This is a great take on the original story, Michael. I did feel for Clark, though. Your description was really well done - not the most pleasant of scenes to describe! - but very effective. Maybe next time your muse wants to get ultra-descriptive you could have Clark send Lois to a lavender farm?! Just joking, this was great. Corrina.
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Hi Corrina! This is a great take on the original story, Michael. I did feel for Clark, though. Thanks, I'm glad you liked it Your description was really well done - not the most pleasant of scenes to describe! - but very effective. Maybe next time your muse wants to get ultra-descriptive you could have Clark send Lois to a lavender farm?!
Just joking, this was great. Michael
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Merriwether
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Merriwether
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I think it's hilarious that Metropolis' back alleys smell worse than its sewers. Perhaps they just have better air circulation.
Elisabeth
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Yeah. Also figured it's a matter of perspective and getting-used-to-it. But I do admit, I don't have a combined sewer system where I could conduct a first hand study Thanks! Michael
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Hey, I saw this just got posted on the Archive and I have to say one word:
SEQUEL!!!
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Thanks, Iolanthe! Will be a while, though Need to finish another fic first. Two actually Michael
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