Great to have you back here, Rac!
My immediate reaction to this chapter was that it made me think about Clark's frustrating episode with Jon. The word to describe it is, I think, indeed
frustration, and frustration on Jon's part. The little boy knows, of course, that he is cold and needs to go inside to get warm. Except he can't see it like that. What he really thinks he needs is get warm without having to go inside, so that he can keep sledding. Why can't his dad fix that for him? Isn't that what dads are for?
Jon is frustrated because he can't be comfortable and have fun in the snow at the same time. He needs to take his frustration out on someone else, so he "punishes" his dad by throwing a tantrum because his dad can't (or won't) get Jon happy and comfortable at the same time.
Interestingly, Clark has indeed thrown "tantrums" of his own, but in his case Lois has been on the receiving end. Like Jon, Clark has been unable to be happy and comfortable after he returned to the Earth, so he has needed to take his frustration out on somebody. And the one who had to suffer because of Clark's frustration was Lois, because who else would put up with it? Clark realized what he was doing to Lois and hated himself for it, but he couldn't help himself.
A small boy like Jon is going to be unable to really control himself when he is bitterly frustrated. Clark, who has been such a wonderfully patient and idealistic man, has been able to control himself so much better than most people, but his unspeakable experiences on New Krypton did such damage to him that he lost so much of his faith in himself. Rac, you said:
When I worked with survivors of torture, our consulting therapists always told us how important having a sense of control is. We take for granted the ordinary control we have over our everyday lives - what to wear, what to eat, whom to talk to, etc. When that's gone, it can demolish your sense of self.
Well, this is at least partly the lot of children, or it certainly can be. As a child, you may not have that much control over your everyday life, because the adults around you can wrest that control away from you. In this part, Jon lost control over his everyday life when Clark lifted him up against his will and carried him inside.
But on New Krypton, Clark lost control over his everyday life. He became a child of sorts when he was on New Krypton, a child at the mercy of horribly cruel adults. When Clark was able to return to the Earth, he was still this beaten and battered child, still suffering because of his physical and mental wounds, and unable to stop taking his frustration out on his wife.
I was so glad to see them make real love to one another in a way that was not an expression of other feelings than love. And now I'm wondering what Clark's decision to become an editor at the Daily Planet will mean to them. Lois is hesitant. Does she have the faith in her husband that he will need from her?
Ann