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Wow - you even know how many chapters... eek


Big Apricot Superman Movieverse
The World of Lois & Clark
Richard White to Lois Lane: Lois, Superman is afraid of you. What chance has Clark Kent got? - After the Storm
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Welcome to the boards, Deja Vu!

That's a good fic you are posting for us! It's very well-written, and the fact that you know how many parts there will be obviously means that you have already finished it! laugh clap

A very fascinating aspect of your fic is that Clark appears to be powerless here. Or maybe not. This was ambiguous:
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It was time to spread my wings and fly.

I immediately winced and amended mentally, Well, stretch my legs and run, at least.
Could it be that Clark wants to fly, but for some reason he has decided that he isn't going to do it, so that he won't draw attention to himself? No, really, he seems to be powerless.
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My hand moved to the small lump in my shirt that was my locket, and my fingers traced its outline. If I ran into any madmen or muggers—well, it would be bad for me. I needed to be careful and stay out of trouble.
This doesn't sound like an invulnerable person reflecting on his own situation. And what is that locket he is talking about? What's in it?

All in all, this is an original and fascinating setup. But I need to give you a word of warning about myself. Not only am I talkative, but I am a diehard Lois fan and a ferocious Lois defender as well. If I think that your fic treats Lois badly, then I'm afraid I'm not going to like it, whatever other qualities is has. On the other hand, you should remember that most people here are at least as interested in and fond of Clark as they are of Lois, so I'm not at all representative of the general views of this fandom. Nevertheless, I thought I might as well tell you about myself.

Another thing I don't like much about LnC fics is villain-heavy A-plots, and something tells me that the person Clark has saved is Lex Luthor. Gaaaah! That almost guarantees that Luthor is going to play a major role here. So I may keep commenting or I might not, but even so, welcome to the boards, Deja Vu! clap

Ann

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You posted dance

I can't say much, except I thoroughly enjoyed betaing this.

Corrina.

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Great start. I'm completely intrigued by the changes in Clark and can't wait to see where you are going with this.

I'm with Ann. My thoughts about the mysterious gun-shot victim is that it is Lex Luthor. My, my. What a tangled web we weave ... when the one person who wants to remain in the background saves the 4th wealthiest man and biggest criminal in Metropolis.

Oh, and Clark told him his name. Twice. How will Lex show his appreciation?

More soon.
BJ

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Do I have to go chocolate cake for this one?


"I'm red-eyed, tired and drunk" Teri Hatcher
"Fun will now commence" 7of9
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A very intriguing start. Clark is afraid of leaving Smallville, but interviews at the Daily Planet anyway. He's afraid of touching people, but saves a life anyway. He certainly seems to have some very dark events in his past, but he has a fighting spirit nonetheless.

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That was great and I am intrigued - cannot wait for the next part smile

I am with those guessing that Clark saved Lex - will he repay Clark at all and how only to later (most probably) stab him in the back?

Looking forward to part 2!

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I'm with the others - Clark probably saved Lex Luthor's life. Or, maybe he saved Bill Church's life. Either way, this simple act of kindness will surely not go unpunished.

You were quite cagey about whether or not Clark has any special abilities. You were also pretty sneaky about the blood on Clark's hand being somehow sickening to him. That could mean so many things, but instead of guessing (which I do all to often), I'll just wait for the next chapter to see how right I am in my surmises.

And yes, this is a very well-written first chapter. It's taut, it's informative without pontification, and now Clark has a story to give Perry tomorrow - should he choose not to lead with the Borneo gecko story.

I hope real life treats you nicely and you can maintain your posting schedule. This is one I plan to follow closely.


Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.

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Hey, all. Thanks so much for the feedback! I'm much obliged!


Dandello-- I do indeed know how many chapters there are! The story is "complete" -- it's just going through a second beta reading by Corrina.


Ann-- Thanks for your feedback! You've certainly picked up on some important parts. laugh But I guess the particular significance of said parts may have to wait a few chapters...
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But I need to give you a word of warning about myself. Not only am I talkative, but I am a diehard Lois fan and a ferocious Lois defender as well. If I think that your fic treats Lois badly, then I'm afraid I'm not going to like it, whatever other qualities is has.
Fair enough! smile There's no sense in continuing to read something when you find you don't like it--I can certainly understand that! I hope I've handled Lois all right, but I guess we all have different tastes, so we'll see how things go...Thanks for welcoming me to the boards!


Corrina-- And I have really enjoyed your BRing it! The fic has vastly improved from its initial state.


BJ-- Thanks for the feedback. This made me smile:
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What a tangled web we weave ... when the one person who wants to remain in the background saves the 4th wealthiest man and biggest criminal in Metropolis.
Haha. Guess that's part of the Clark/Superman appeal-- you have the reporter who's "so mild mannered he doesn't have a pulse" on one side and the flashy "Greek god" of a superhero on the other. But somehow both sides manage to attract a lot of attention from unsavory types...


SJH-- Chocolate cake? Only if you share it with me! smile


AmyPrime-- Hurrah for those fighting spirits, eh? It can be really rough to move forward sometimes...


DW-- Thanks for the feedback!
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I am with those guessing that Clark saved Lex - will he repay Clark at all and how only to later (most probably) stab him in the back?
*shakes head* Such cynicism! Hehehe...


Terry Leatherwood-- This made me laugh:
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Either way, this simple act of kindness will surely not go unpunished.
Don't good deeds deserve good in return? laugh Hehehe.

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You were quite cagey about whether or not Clark has any special abilities. You were also pretty sneaky about the blood on Clark's hand being somehow sickening to him.
Cagey? Sneaky? Me? angel-devil

Haha, okay, maybe so. I might have had a little too much fun in raising questions, I'll admit...

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And yes, this is a very well-written first chapter. It's taut, it's informative without pontification, and now Clark has a story to give Perry tomorrow - should he choose not to lead with the Borneo gecko story.
Thank you! smile But I bet that knob-tailed gecko story really was something...

As for posting, there might be a bump or two along the way, but I doubt there will be any problems. *knock on wood*


Thanks a million for the responses, everyone!

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Welcome to the boards, Deja Vu!

Your story is off to a great start! clap

I, too, kept thinking Lex Luthor with the dead well-dressed man Nighel St. John.

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My hand moved to the small lump in my shirt that was my locket, and my fingers traced its outline.
Together with the description, the locket seems like a memento of Clark's painful experience. Did he hurt someone with his powers?

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He mumbled something, and I pressed on his chest with the utmost care, using my hand to keep the air out and hopefully stop the bleeding. I waited for a second to make sure I wasn’t hurting him.
This certainly indicates it.

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If I ran into any madmen or muggers—well, it would be bad for me. I needed to be careful and stay out of trouble.
I'd say he's not afraid but worried his secret might get out.

/off to leave FDK for part 2/
Michael


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Welcome to the boards, Deja Vu!

Your story is off to a great start! clap
Thanks, Michael! I appreciate the feedback. smile


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