A few notes to help with ease of reading. **** denotes breaks between scenes. < > denotes Clark's thoughts. << >> denotes Lois' thoughts. {{{{ }}}} denotes scenes of past events. ^^^^ denotes journal writings. ++++ denotes the passing of a significant amount of time.
The story picks up right after the events in 'Contact'. It should be fairly easy to follow from there.
****
She looked so small lying there; the bandage on her forehead testament that he’d failed her. It was also the incentive he needed to do what had to be done.
“We just... can’t be together,” he told her softly.
“What?” she asked, the expression on her face clearly showing the confusion she had to be feeling.
“I love you way too much to ever put you in danger,” he continued, glancing down at his shaking hands. Why couldn’t she just understand? Why couldn’t she just accept this?
He finally lifted his eyes back to her fearful stare. “I have to do this,” he said softly.
“Clark...”
“No, Lois. This just isn’t going to work,” he argued, silently begging her to give in.
“Don’t you think you’re being a bit dramatic?” she asked.
“Call it what you like, but I won’t take the risk.”
“Don’t you mean we?” She shoved the covers back on the bed and rose to stomp into the kitchen.
He sighed heavily before following her. “There can’t be a we, Lois. I can’t take the chance of anyone ever using you against me again.”
She drank down the water she’d poured before slamming her cup into the sink, effectively sloshing the remnants of the clear liquid across the front of her shirt. Turning around, she faced Clark with fire in her eyes.
“Haven’t you thought that maybe the damage has already been done? People are well aware that Superman and I are friends!”
“That’s why I have to put distance between us.”
“Uh, huh. And what the hell does that have to do with you?”
His brows furrowed at that. “I, ah, I’m Superman,” he stammered softly.
“I know that!” She threw up hands in frustration, pacing restlessly. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but aren’t Clark Kent and Superman supposed to be two different people?”
“Well, yeah,” he answered, not entirely sure where this was headed.
“Then I ask again, what does Superman have to do with Clark?”
He slowly closed his mouth as understanding dawned.
“What better way to disassociate yourself from me than that?” Lois asked without waiting for his answer to her last question.
“I understand what you’re saying. Really, I do. But it would never work,” he told her.
“Why not?” She placed her hands on her hips, fully challenging him.
“*I* can’t disassociate myself from you.”
“Isn’t that what I just said?”
He sighed again. “Lois, if we continued to see each other, my feelings would leak through into my Superman personality, and we’d be right back where we started.”
“So, we just give it all up?”
“I’m sorry,” he told her regretfully. He just didn’t see a way around this. He would die if anything ever happened to her because of him being Superman.
Lois entered her bedroom again, looking around as if she’d never seen the place. She was hurting and he knew it. There just wasn’t another way to do this.
“I wish there was some other way,” Clark told her as he took a step in her direction. He wanted to reach out to her, comfort her. But he was the cause of her discomfort. Discomfort she would have to endure.
“So do I,” she replied in a strangled tone.
He was about to say something else, but a cry for help stopped him.
“I have to go,” he said quickly, then disappeared in a flash of color.
This was for the best, he told himself as he flew toward the scene of an accident on the Tenth Street bridge. One day Lois would come to understand why he’d had to do this.
She had to.
****
Silent tears made tracks down Lois’ cheeks as she stood in shocked disbelief. She pushed a hand through her hair and went to flop down on her bed.
Why had she cut her hair in the first place? She thought absently, her mind desperately searching for something, anything, to fill the void Clark had just left behind.
Who cares? She moaned and dropped over onto her side, giving in to the torrent of emotions running through her. Sobs racked her body as she tried to grasp what would make Clark do such a thing.
Had she really meant so little to him?
They’d spent two years building a bridge of trust that she’d thought couldn’t be broken. Shaken maybe, but not broken. How wrong she’d been. In the span of a brief conversation, Clark had proven with absolute clarity what she’d learned so long ago.
Men were lunkheads- untrustworthy, egotistical lunkheads.
****
Lois smoothed a hand down the front of her slacks as she took a breath for courage, then stepped off the elevator onto the newsroom floor. She hoped she didn’t look as unsteady as she felt. She’d cried herself sick the night before. Part of her had believed that Clark would get home and think about how idiotic he’d been, then call and apologize. But he hadn’t called. And she absolutely refused to call him. She wasn’t the one who’d done this.
She glanced up to see him drop his gaze back down to a file lying on his desk. He’d obviously seen her arrive and was trying to act as if he hadn’t. Lois stood straighter, determined to show Clark that he might have shaken her spirit with his declaration to separate himself from her, but he’d by no means broken it. After all, she was Lois Lane.
Somewhere nearing midnight the previous evening, Lois had washed her face and allowed the anger to set in. Yes, Clark had hurt her deeply. But now she was mad. She loved Clark and for him to decide that *they* couldn’t be together wasn’t going to change that. However, she wasn’t about to allow him or his decision to sideline her for long.
Lois dropped her briefcase on the floor beside her chair as she flipped on her computer. Ten minutes later, she’d checked her email and reviewed her notes for an ongoing story. She’d done it all without thinking about Clark.
Or the fact that he’d broken up with her.
Well, almost.
She glanced over at him. He was trying to appear busy, but she knew him too well. He was just as much an emotional wreck as she was. Deciding that the best way to handle her pain was to face it head on, she pushed up to her feet and made her way toward Clark.
“Look,” she told him when she was standing before him. “I’m not exactly sure why you did what you did. At this moment, I don’t even care. I will tell you this. You’ve made your position perfectly clear. While I, in no way, understand or respect that position, I’m not about to sit around feeling sorry for myself. I love you and that’s not about to change any time soon. But you’ve hurt me deeply. That’s not about to change any time soon either. However, we do still work together.” She stopped and glared at him.
“Unless you’re going to change that, too?” It was a question that she expected him to answer.
“I’m not changing that,” he told her softly.
“So,” she hurried on before he could say whatever it was his lips were puckered to utter. “Give me a wide berth. Give me time to deal with this.”
“Absolutely,” he agreed quickly. Much too quickly for her.
“Good. I’ll ask Perry to give us separate assignments.”
****
And with that, she was headed in the direction of Perry’s office. Clark felt as if the wind had been knocked from him as her words sank in.
Separate assignments... The words hang in the air as stagnant as smoke.
But what had he expected? To walk in here this morning like nothing had ever happened between them except a professional relationship? Friendship?
He leaned back in his chair as he realized that he *really* had separated them.
<Why did this whole thing sound so much better yesterday?>
He looked up when Lois walked back across the room toward her desk. She was the picture of professionalism. Her calm exterior belied her true feelings. That was a volatile situation.
<What have I done?>
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Or should I say 'what have I done?' Want more?
SQD
