Lois awoke to an empty room.
Her mouth felt like cotton. She struggled to get up to reach for the glass of water on the stand. After a few gulps, she dared to open her eyes wider. She was relieved the curtains were closed. She didn't think she could face sunshine just yet.
She attempted to sit up, dizzy, but in control. Well, maybe. She wobbled a bit but got herself to the bathroom.
When she came back in she sat on the bed, trying to remember... There was something niggling in the back of her mind about last night. <<Where *am* I?>>
She remembered flying with Superman and bright lights... but where to...?
Cautiously she made her way to the curtain. She wasn't sure if she was more frightened of discovering where they had landed or the potential for blinding sun on top of the worst hangover ever.
Turns out both became her worst enemy. Only one city in the world had a fantasy make-believe skyline like that. And it wasn't Metropolis. It was Las Vegas.
"What the heck am I doing in Las Vegas?" Then she remembered her partner in crime... Her *other* partner in crime... "And where is Superman?"
As if on cue, he came in the door, in full Superman regalia carrying orange juice and bagels.
"Good morning," he offered shyly. "Um, I brought you breakfast."
She nodded, her mind confused. "Why--why are we here?" she asked, panic rising in her.
"What do you remember about last night?" he asked cautiously.
If she wasn't so tired, so ridiculously hungover, she might have noticed a few things. First, Superman was being overly solicitous and was very nervous. He had dropped his super-persona entirely. He literally was Clark in spandex and she just didn't see it. She only knew that something was wrong with the whole situation but she had no idea what it was. And second, he held a suspicious piece of paper that he seemed to not know what to do with.
She sat down at the lovely breakfast table, complete with fresh roses.
That clued her in to one memory. "I remember... dinner with Clark last night."
He nodded. "Good. That's a start."
"And... you came over..." She suddenly remembered something, "Are you okay? I mean that red Kyrptonite stuff..."
"Yeah, I'm fine... though it did cloud my judgment a bit," he said wryly. <<That was an understatement.>>
"Oh, and the wine... so much wine..." she said, putting her hand on her head. "Two bottles, I think?"
"Um, three. We drank three bottles..."
"Oh, god," she fell into her arms on the table. "How did we end up here?" she spoke into the table.
"Well, it's my fault we're here," he decided to admit right off the bat. Take as much blame as possible to start. "I decided to take us flying and well, I just ended up a lot farther west than I meant to."
She managed to look at him before burying her nose in the coffee cup he had offered her. "Did anything happen, though?" she asked cautiously.
Superman was shifting uncomfortably. She had never seen Superman so discomfited. It kept reminding her of something, something just out of reach...
"We... we did do something a bit foolish last night," he began.
"What?" she asked, terrified. "Please, please, tell me we didn't--" she gestured with her hand.
<<Well, that could mean any number of things,>> thought Clark. "We didn't---do anything--physically," he got out.
She sighed. "Well, thank goodness for that."
"But--"
"But? there's a but? Oh, god, this can't be good..."
He reached for her hand. "Remember when I tell you this, that we did this together and we'll find our way together."
"Okay..." she said, wary of his cryptic statement.
"We... got married."
She laughed. She honestly *laughed*.
"No... no, we didn't. We--" then, all of the sudden her face froze in memory. "Ohmygod. We *did*. We got married!"
She sat staring at him a moment, shocked. Then she stood up, suddenly angry. "How could you have let this happen, Superman? I trusted you! How did you let us do something so---"
But she gave up almost a moment later. She realized she was partly to blame as well, and besides, she just didn't have the energy or the focus to argue yet; the room was still a bit spinny. So she sat back down on the bed, not looking at him. "And what will I tell Clark?" she whispered.
Clark watched her carefully. He sat next to her on the bed, and tried taking her hand.
"Don't--touch me!" she cried. She was too confused with him near. Superman had always done that to her, but now it was just too much. "What are we going to do? Can we get an annulment?" she asked.
He sighed. "Yeah, I think so. But, um, well, there's something else I have to tell you first."
"Something *else*?" She couldn't believe this. She couldn't believe she was in *this* situation with Superman! It was so laughable! A year ago she would have been thrilled to find herself accidentally married to Superman. But now--things were moving ahead for her and Clark. They still had their bumps, but--how could he ever forgive her for marrying his old rival for her heart, even if it wasn't entirely on purpose?
"Just tell me quick. Like a band-aid. Rip it off," she said, determined to hear the worst.
Clark sat there a moment. What exactly should he tell her first?
"Lois-- I--I mean we--" then he heard it. Several cries for help. This would have to wait. "I have to go, Lois. Just stay here!"
With a whoosh, he was gone. <<Well, that almost felt familiar,>> she thought, but was distracted by the paper sitting on the chair that Superman had just vacated.
She reached over for it, and then stared, horrified. "Clark Kent married to Lois Lane," she read aloud. "What?" she cried in disbelief. "Oh no..." she moaned, remembering bits of the ceremony. "This--this *can't* be!" She had begun to imagine those words someday printed on a certificate, but like this, married to a superhero, using the name of the man she loved? It was horrible, and terribly, terribly wrong.
She felt tears well up and her head hurt; she collapsed onto her pillow. Not only had she married Superman, Clark's old rival for her affections, but they had made Clark the butt of a joke, using his name. She would have to tell him everything in order to get the marriage annulled! It would be so humiliating, for both of them, and she wasn't sure she could face him. Sure, Clark had his mess-ups, and odd behavior, but he had never done anything so sinister to her before, so mocking of their relationship. He was never going to forgive her for this--could and should never forgive her! Of that she was certain.
Lois' head pounded as the tears came down. "How had this happened? How?" she asked herself over and over again.
She cried herself back to sleep.
*********
Clark found her sleeping, lying in the fetal position. The certificate of marriage was lying under her hand.
He wondered what she had thought when she saw it. Had she laughed, still mad at Clark for leaving her last night? Or was she mad at Superman? Either way, she wouldn't be happy with *him*. They were in a complicated situation in Clark's estimation. But were they? Really? If he could just tell her the truth... but she had been lied to for two years. And this last betrayal... did their relationship have a chance of surviving it, even if he told her everything? Hadn't he done everything in his power to drive the wedge between himself and Lois, intentional or no?
He thought of changing into Clark and then waking her. It might make her realize a very crucial detail in this whole situation... but it might also humiliate her to the point that she would never speak to him again. He had to tread lightly. That was for sure.
He was really exhausted. There had been some fires in California, and two families had been trapped in a forest. It had been a harrowing rescue, complete with a missing four year old that he had found clinging to a tree almost a mile away from his family. How he had sympathized with that little boy. He felt like a lost child himself, clinging to anything that might keep him safe from the fires that raged around him. Only, Clark knew that it was he who had started the fires in his life; the boy had simply been a victim of circumstance.
He sat gently on the bed, watching Lois sleep. How had their world spun so out of control? He'd been working up the courage for weeks to tell her the truth, in between thinking about asking her to marry him. But he never could quite bring himself to do either. He was never certain which should come first. He wanted her to know about Superman, but he also had wanted to know that she'd marry plain old Clark. And now, with the cart before the horse, so to speak, he had a revelation to deal with and had to somehow convince her to stay married to him. Cause that was just it, wasn't it? He did love her, more than anything, and he wanted to marry her. But he had messed up everything last night... and yet she had also been complicit in it!
She had enjoyed making fun of Clark. She had laughed like crazy at the idea of marrying 'Clark.' But... he had also seen something in her eyes, as she had said those vows. She hadn't really been looking at Superman. He had simply been the convenient man in the room. He thought she had really wanted to say those words to Clark. And maybe, after all, that's why he had let her.
He decided he'd take her back to Metropolis. It was here, in this fake, overblown town, that he felt more like a clown than ever. Superman in Vegas was a joke. Just this morning he saw at least three other grooms in a Superman get-up. One guy had even asked where he had rented his costume, because it looked so 'authentic.' He shook his head with a laugh in memory, <<Authentic-looking because it *is* authentic.>> And that had jarred him enough to realize they had to get out of this fantasy land. He just couldn't take any more sick jokes about their situation. Maybe if they went home, he'd be able to think and work out a way to sort through this.
Clark didn't hesitate further. He scooped up Lois and headed for the window. He was careful not to wake her, wanting to let her sleep for as long as absolutely possible. Partly because he wasn't ready to face her again, and also because she'd need her strength to deal with what he would have to eventually tell her.
*******
Lois felt cold. Was there a window open?
She could feel arms around her, though. Solid arms. Warm arms. She snuggled closer. Clark? Hmmm... yeah....
*******
Clark was amazed that she slept nearly the whole flight back to Metropolis. Her implicit trust in him always floored him. It also made him feel even more guilty because of how he repeatedly betrayed that trust. How was it the one woman in the world that he wanted to protect above all, he kept managing to hurt?
They arrived back at her apartment. She opened her eyes as he landed inside, the window still open from their midnight flight into disaster.
"We're back?" she asked, looking around, still feeling a bit dazed. "Thank goodness. Vegas was just a little too much..." she said.
"Tell me about it," murmured Clark.
She wandered into the kitchen in the search for some coffee.
Clark just watched her, not certain what his next move should be.
"Are you okay?" he finally ventured, worry written on his face.
"My head still hurts a little. And I feel groggy from sleeping too---" she caught his look. "I'm okay. I just... don't know what to do. I saw the certificate of--- I saw it, Superman. With Clark's name on it! How could we have done that! How could you have *let* them-- *us* do that to him? Aren't you his friend? Aren't I--" she dropped off, not looking at him. She was just ranting, still tired, still half drunk.
Clark stood there, motionless in his tracks. He couldn't get words to form. <<Just tell her the truth!>>
She got a glass of water and then finally turned to Superman. "I'm going to lose him, you know?" she said, tears coming to her eyes.
He was by her side in two strides and finally found his voice. "You could never lose Clark, Lois. Surely you know that."
But he could suddenly see, by the frightened look in her eyes, that she didn't know that.
<<Have I been so careless with my love for you?>> he asked her silently.
He knew it was now or never. He had to tell her, everything.
"Lois, you could never lose Clark because---" he stopped. He couldn't get the words out. He wanted to say it. Just say it, dammit! But would the truth be earnest enough coming from Superman? Would she believe him? Maybe he did need to do this as Clark. Maybe it would just have to wait a little longer.
She was waiting expectantly. "Because...?"
He sighed, resigned. "Because he loves you, Lois. You could never lose Clark because he loves you."
"But you don't understand, Superman. I've betrayed him in the worst possible way! By putting his name on that certificate, and marrying you--- it will break his heart! He'll never speak to me again!"
She was crying. He wanted to take her in his arms, but he dared not do it.
"He will, Lois. His *is* speaking to you," he tried, putting a hand on her shoulder to comfort. He found himself in between personae; he couldn't be impersonal as Superman and yet, he couldn't entirely be Clark, either. His gesture and subtle hint at the truth simply wasn't enough to get her attention. Lois was sobbing.
"I love him! Don't you see? And I used to love you. I mean, you are very, very special to me, Superman, and always will be. But Clark--- I was so close to trusting him with my whole heart. Yet I've held back just this little bit because--"
<<Sirens, and multiple cries for help,>> he sighed in frustration. "Lois, I will be right back. I have to go! Please. Please don't cry. It will be all right."
And then he was gone.
"Because he keeps disappearing," she said to the empty room.
********
She sat with that thought for a long time. Is this what it would be like to be married to Superman? Him dashing off to save the world at any moment, even when she needed him?
Lois mulled that over. This pattern feels so familiar. So like Clark. <<At least Superman has legitimate excuses. Clark-->> She paused. <<No, no... it couldn't be? Could it?>> She poured herself a cup of coffee, thinking. And she wasn't liking where this was going. <<Clark's excuses were always so lame... but if he *were* Superman, and no one knew, of course they'd be lame, because they were all lies!>> Clark had been lying to her! *He* was Superman! And he'd been lying in the worst possible way! It all came together in her mind, all those things that she'd been trying to understand, it all made a horrible kind of sense.
She felt sick. Nauseous, even. She had been so afraid that if Clark found out what had happened, she'd lose him. She had felt *so* sorry for him! And yet, here he had played her for a fool! This was worse than the disappearing act. This betrayed everything they could've been! So what if they were drunk when it happened. It should *not* have happened! Period!
"Just wait till you get back here, Clark Kent!"
