Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic FDK-The Other Shoe chapter 3

Ok I am absolutely adoring this story! You are one of my favorite authors and I eagerly await the next chapter!!

Wait, what? You'll send Clark by to pick me up and take me to Kansas? For real! I can't believe it!

I had this all picked out to comment about until your last sentence:


Artemis
Wait - can I pick the date?

I like the way you're going between past and present. I really liked the line Lois was thinking that Clark never let her down when she really needed him. (Still figuring out this quote stuff.) And Lois' feelings all over the place about Clark certainly rang true too.

What's next??

Ooh! Me! me! Pick me!

I am suddenly recalling the old "Calgon, take me away" commercials and revising them to, "Clark Kent, take me away!"

Another good part. Since this part was from Lois' POV, is it safe to assume that the next part will be from Clark's POV?

Why do I get the feeling that, based on the story structure so far, the actual rescue won't take place until at least part 8, and more likely part 9 or part 10?

I'm ready for part 4 whenever you are ready to post it.

Joy,
Lynn

Yes, giving us the story with the past and present is working really well--we get face time with the two of them, meanwhile we're wondering what's going to happen to Lois. Brilliant!

Lois, honey, make up your mind! I know she's insecure, but you'd think by now that she'd realize hanging out with Clark wouldn't be so bad.

See... told you, Lois.

Excellent part, Sue!! Can't wait for more!!

Me! Me! Please pick me! I never get to go anywhere!!

Is it Twitchell who nabbed Lois? It sounds like she could be in a shipping container being all metal-- oh but I forgot that the floor is wooden...

Can't wait for more!!

What?! A trip to Kansas??? That wasn't mentioned in my beta contract. I demand a re-write!

Brava Sue! Loving the accolades that you are getting for this fic..because it is ALL true! Love ya lady

I'm in pick me up! Can't wait for more Sue. You are my favorite nfic/fanfic writer.Laura

Well, I hate to say it, but... I have absolutely no desire to, well... go to Kansas <g> However, if Clark wants to pick me up and fly me somewhere else, I'd certainly be willing to have that discussion.

I know! He can fly me far enough into the future that Sue will have finished posting her story, so I can read it all at once!

PJ

bellarase - Thanks for starting a FDK thread so quickly - wow! I'm delighted to hear that you're adoring the story. As to being a favored author…

Thank you for the note on sea vans. I didn't have direct access to one but it seemed like the ones I had seen had metal floors. I've fixed it in the story.

Joan - Thank you! I'm glad you're still along for the ride.

Lynn - You get a ride too! We'll have an impromptu FoLC fest at the Kent's farmhouse! Loved "Clark Kent, take me away." I may have some free time at work for the next couple of weeks - I think a Photoshopped "Calgon" ad could require my attention.

Yes, the next part is from Clark's POV. It might interest you to know (or it might not <g>), that I originally had each part told from both character's POVs and this was a seven-part story. But as the flashbacks and the story became more fleshed out, they also became extremely long. I didn't want people scrolling, scrolling, scrolling and wondering when the part was ever gonna frickin' end, so I split them. Define "rescue". <heh>

mozartmaid - You poor little shut-in, you can come too!

Like I said above, Lois' insecurities are what make her so interesting to me. Of course she knows that hanging out with Clark is not a bad thing, but you also have to think that somewhere, deep down, she instinctively knows there's something going on with him that isn't quite what it seems. It's that unknown that feeds her insecurities and makes her sabotage herself.

Evelyn - You're right - Twitchell sure sounds like a suspect. But Lois knows him and would certainly recognize him if he was sitting next to her in a bar.

Yes, Clark was absolutely working up to confessing. He'd already tried that line in his head the night before. My only regret in telling this scene from Lois' POV is that we don't get to be inside Clark's head when she interrupts him just as he's finally found the courage to confess.

Lola - If there was anyone who feared the word "rewrite", it should be you. Thank you for your support and enthusiasm. You keep me going.

Laura - Awww! Thank you for the compliments! I'm so glad to see you're in for the story. I will add you to the list of flyees.

Pam - See, I figured Michael might not be crazy about flying with Clark, but I didn't think anyone would balk at Kansas. I'm sure it's just my dirty mind, but the way you put it I have absolutely no desire to, well... go to Kansas made me briefly wonder if it was a euphemism for something else. Now I'm intrigued with what kind of double meaning we could imbue "going to Kansas" with.

Clark says to tell you that while the future is out, the world is your oyster. Have cape, will travel or something like that. (Sometimes he mumbles.)

Thanks to everyone for dropping in to say "hi". I appreciate it more than you'll ever know.

Thank you! I had no idea, and I was wondering "What would have metal walls but a wooden floor?"

I'm always amazed at the depth of knowledge to be found here on the boards (usually serendipitous!)

Hee hee hee. I guess that's the price she pays for being such a good reporter.

Yeah, why is she there? What do they want? Ominous thoughts rumble through my head.

Ooh, I love this line! It's so true.

This was a great little scene - I can just see Clark, all nervous because he's finally worked up the courage to tell Lois his secret, and then she goes and interrupts him! The knee jerking was a wonderful image too.

Of course, since Bobby was waiting right there, it's probably a good idea he didn't tell her then.

Yeah, Lois, and don't have the Daily Planet publish your photos all over the place with the caption, "The Hottest Team In Town"! It just might interfere with the incognito.

I love how you crank up the angst-o-meter.

You just insist on breaking up the couch fun for all this A-plot. No really, it's been a great start, I'm enjoying the flashbacks.

Would you believe I'm not packing up to move? I feel like this is your first story in 3 years that hasn't coincided with the demise of my housing environment.

Jen

Pick me too! Pick me too! I've never been to Kansas!

Anyway, great part and I love the flashbacks too! Clark's knee-jerking reaction almost managed to make me nervous too ... And I was also going, what has metal walls, but a wooden floor?

Eagerly waiting for part 4, part 5 and well ... honestly .. the rest of the story too

Hmm, I'm guessing Lois is in one of those shipping containers they were talking about ... and is no longer in Metropolis if Superman can't hear her. She's definitely in a pickle.

This exchange demonstrates why the end of S2 is my favorite time to write them in, when they are an acknowledged couple but still new at it. The way he asks this, even without our inside knowledge of how much he's asking, is wonderful. And even Lois's response works well. I normally get frustrated with these artificial roadblocks, but this one felt natural, I think mainly because Lois realized immediately what she'd done and how she'd blown it. They are both clearly into each other at this point, wanting to be together but neither wanting to apply too much pressure. And that feels natural rather than contrived.

This, however, was an unexpected twist. Does it tie in to why Lois was taken? Is it a red herring? Looking forward to finding out.

Kathy

I've never really had any desire to go to Kansas, but if Clark's flying, I'm in!

First things first: Lois' incarceration...

I was inclined to think that she was being held in a shipping container since she'd been watching the docks, but would the floor be wood when everything else is metal? I am really bothered that she yelled for Superman for so long w/o him hearing her. That ups the ante a bit for me. Where could she possibly be? And in the midst of all the angst, I found myself chuckling that of course Lois should have insisted that they had dinner prior to a movie, so that when kidnapped after the movie, she'd have a full stomach.

I absolutely adored the entire exchange b/t Lois and Clark from the moment he stepped into the car until Bobby Bigmouth showed up. I loved her internal monologue -

Yeah she did; yeah he did.

Woohoo! Enjoyed that and the surrounding introspection. And given the next topic of conversation I'd say that Clark is likely in just as much emotional turmoil as Lois.

*sigh* So he asks her to Smallville. Lois' reaction is very Lois, but I can't help but wonder, was he working up to actually telling her he was Superman in car? Or were the nerves simply about his asking and her response?

In an instant the spell is broken and the drama is heightened - someone is targeting Superman... hmmm.

Like that he's in love with Lois and would go crazy to get her back if she were to be kidnapped?!?!

These are the moments I imagine Lois will remember over time after finding out Superman's identity and a *facepalm* will ensue.

Very intriguing indeed. It was only just as I was copying this quote that I fully processed that the daylight was shining through the floor. Where the heck is she? Gah! Can't wait for more.

Ilolanthe - I, too, am always amazed (and grateful for) the wide range of knowledge on these boards.

Thank you for all the quotes and comments. It makes the time spent writing and re-writing and re-writing and re-writing and… (you get the idea), well, it makes it seem worthwhile when someone catches a detail and remarks on it.

DW - Okay! You're in for Kansas, too! I'm glad you're enjoying the flashbacks and that Clark's bouncing knee made you nervous.

Kathy - I squealed when I saw that you were reading this story!

And then I grinned like an idiot as I read your comments. I'm so glad that you didn't find the stakeout scene to be an artificial roadblock; that it felt natural to you. There's a progression that both characters need to make and that scene is an essential building block. I'm also glad that I managed to pull an unexpected twist on you.

Emily - You've never had a desire to go to Kansas? For shame! It's… lovely this time of year. Actually, it really is. A crisp, cold autumn day when the tall grass has all turned golden and the sky is a brilliant blue? It's amazing. You can stand in one spot and it's like you can feel the earth moving and you realize what a tiny little speck you are in the grand scheme of things.

If you think you're upset that Lois could yell for Superman for so long and not have him hear her, think how she must feel. Thank you for chuckling at her line about wishing she'd insisted on dinner first. Sometimes Lois can be so practical. Not often, mind you, and it's usually in hindsight.

You're right - Clark is in huge emotional turmoil. He's finally worked up the oomph to tell her the truth and she freaks out before he can get to the good part. I think you're right, there's a *facepalm* in her future.

You picked up on the angle I was hoping readers would catch - which is that most common criminals know that Lois Lane is special to Superman. Heck, it's even possible she knows something of value about him, isn't it?

I think it worked from Lois' POV. We the readers could see the signs and figure it out. Now, if you wanted to have Clark remember his frustration and failure to be able to communicate, that would be good too.
To be clearer on the sea vans, they do have a corrugated floor too. The wooden floor is inside a corrugated steel box. The steel box is to keep the contents weather proof against the salt water at sea. Used ones are often used on land for cheap storage facilities you can rent. Sometimes, those have the pallets removed because they are not being lifted while loaded and the pallets themselves are valuable.
Yes, I did have a job that let me know about many strange things and I'm happy I can put it to use here. But I wouldn't have bet on sea vans being one of the things!

Artemis

Said Sue: /me is shamed.

Check your inbox.

B

P.S.
Still loved this part. Others have already mentioned how much they liked the scene in the car, but I loved the leg bouncing and Lois's hopes that Clark would want to spend the weekend with her only to freak out that Clark would want to spend the weekend with her was fantastically Lois and Clark.

Ok, I am not even making this up. I spoke too soon. I just got my eviction notice today...(at least I don't do roommates anymore. That's a plus, right?)

Looking forward to the next part,
JD

I try. After all, FDK is the only workout Muse gets these days



I admit, I'm a bit surprised, after all, it's just one episode before she almost accepts his proposal

/mutters and goes getting a towel to clean up water distributed across screen./

Huh... Sue, I think we must talk about your definition of 'a little a-plot'...



Huh, I'm thinking she's not swinging on a crane, but what's going on? Maybe she's stashed somewhere in the container park in the harbor...?

Michael, hoping that the flashing folder will soon result in part 4 to appear