A long silence hung in the air and LL looked around, a challenge in her eyes.
“Nobody?” She asked mockingly after she felt it had been silent long enough. She was focusing her gaze on Lane, still very much afraid of looking either Kal-El in the eyes. She talked a good game, but being in this room with them was enough to make her want to lose her lunch, so great was her fear. It took every strength of will in her not to beg forgiveness, and the occasional and gentle feel of Zara's hand on her arm or back made her aware that her companion was aware and very sympathetic. She knew that Zara felt the same way, but maybe she was better at hiding her feelings, or maybe her own strength and powers as well as the fact that her abuse had been sporadic were enough to give her this annoying calmness.
Kent and Clark both detected her fear. They had known about it since the two had joined them in this world. Zara's unease was no secret either and after hearing her talk, they were both sickeningly aware of why this unease existed. To stand in the presence of three women who had been horribly violated by the doppelganger of someone who was identical to them was very hard for the two Kryptonian men.
“Is the test over,” asked Lois calmly and on the heels of LL's words. “Did we pass?"
LL glared at her mutely.
“We are all reporters,” Lois swept the room indicating herself, Lane, and the two Clarks. “We aren't likely to fall for bluster. But points for trying.”
“You think you know me,” hissed LL, “I stopped being like you -well – like her when the Kryptonians invaded my world.” She indicated Lane with some amount of shame at snapping at Lois. Lois's imprisonment had been partially her fault. While she hadn't ordered it herself as part of a resistance cover-up, she had never sanctioned a rescue mission, despite impassioned requests from both Ching and Zara. The risks had always outweighed the obvious fact that it was the morally correct thing to do. It had been Ching who had finally said to her in anger that she had pretty much lost her own humanity. Stung by the fact that a duty bound and seemingly cold alien would feel herself to be inhumane, she had soldiered on. It wasn't until later, when Herb had arrived, that both Kryptonians had told her that even at the risk of alienating themselves from the resistance effort, they were going to rescue Lois. Seeing Lois here made her feel incredibly guilty about not rescuing her sooner even as she knew that given a chance to make choices again, she wouldn't have changed her decision.
“No,” said Lois, unaware of LL's back story as far as she was concerned. “Of course not. I know, as you well know, how this kind of life changes a person. “Lois" she indicated Lane, “and I are quite different. We react very differently in similar situations. But it's not good strategy to make the clone believe that 'Lois Lane' is alive. He may have believed that I was from another universe, but if he sees another one of us, he's going to suspect the more mundane likelihood that we are clones of the original. He may believe that the original still lives, and once that happens, he's going to find you.”
LL shivered at the other woman's words. Of course she knew all this, and of course using Lane as bait would have been a very foolish and pointless act. It had never truly been on the plate in the first place as Zara had tried to say until LL had shot her a desperate warning look requesting her silence.
“You wanted to see how we would react,” Kent spoke. He noticed Clark was actually afraid to speak up first. He knew that Clark's own experience with his Lois had taught him to be careful at how he reacted to her, and he was obviously transferring that care to LL. But Kent was himself, and he and Lane had a very energetic back and forth flow of ideas and opinions. He had managed to risk upsetting Lois a few times by not checking the water before he did things – like the lessons in blocking telepathy, or his reaching out for her during a telepathic sending, but it was his opinion that he shouldn't be afraid of his own instincts they way Clark was. Perhaps the biggest strength he brought to all of this was his calm and easy belief that things would be okay.
He gave a quick thought to the other Kal-El. The one from whom the clone had been fashioned. What would his own experiences be in that world once freed? Would he seek to make reparations? Kent shuddered at the enormous burden that this version of himself would have to deal with. Violated and attacked by those he had trusted, and also at the same time knowing his clone had violated and attacked his wife as well as countless humans. He shuddered again, remembering that his own clone had believed 'might is right' and could well have done far worse under those beliefs. In fact it was the clone in this present world had actually tried to force himself on Lois. He knew Clark had dealt with fallout after the clone incident from the general public. Although they knew it hadn't been him, the clone's behavior, as well as Lois's earlier anti-Kryptonian articles had amplified the general fear that people generally felt around Clark when they allowed themselves to think how dangerous he could be if he decided to stop being benign. Once again, Kent silently thanked whatever was out there that gave him such a comparatively easy existence.
LL flinched at his voice, but looked at him challengingly.
“But you knew I was bluffing? So I acquired no actual data.”
“You saw that we don't leap to conclusions or get easily goaded into rebuttal,” said Lane. “We aren't stupid, I suppose, is the data point that you acquired.”
“What would you do to protect her,” asked Zara intently, looking at Kent. “Would you hurt someone?”
“That's an open ended and difficult hypothetical question. In the pure abstract, I'd lay down my life, but nobody else's. I'd like to say I wouldn't hurt anyone, but who's to know. What defines 'hurt'? Have I burned guns in hands, causing pain, to avoid people getting shot... yes, I have – but I prefer not to and that's only when I think it's the only way.”
“Neither of these men are thought to be dangerous by the world at large. And in order for that to be true, they have had to be fairly consistent with helping and never hurting. You know public opinion and how any one slip up would be magnified to world-wide threat.”
“I only have your word for it,Lois,” LL said to Lois.
“I think you know I'm not lying,” she challenged LL as she let her gaze remain even and calm. “You don't like us. I'm aware of that. Clark and Clark are the last people you want to be in the room with right now, let alone allow into your efforts. You will have to work with us and strategize with people who remind you of your worst nightmare. You will have to break all your old ingrained reactions with them – like learning to make steady eye contact, although I have to say you've done amazingly well with that. It took me a long time before I could talk to Clark without feeling like I was going to completely dissolve into panic.”
Clark winced at that, and this was noted by both LL and Zara. If this was an act, it was good.
“I need to stop the clone,” said Lois, filling in the continued silence. “I'm getting periodic sendings from either Kal-El, or the clone... and it's ruining my life. I would rather risk facing him again than having to endure a lifetime of these sendings.” Unspoken in those words were that she would rather die than live as she was. “So whether you work with us or not, we will go into your world and we will mount a rescue mission on the original. Zara's words have assured me at least that the Kal-El in your world is probably more like these two guys than not, no matter what world he was raised on. Zara, you yourself aren't exactly world-conqueror material,” she said very calmly and carefully.
Zara paled.
“I have no desire to behave such,” she said quietly. “I want to lead my people and restore our collective honor.”
“Yes. Because now you're no better than a gang of thugs,” said Lois. “I'm sure it rankled to see my abuse and not do anything about it. I know your personal sense of honor and duty was in conflict with watching someone powerless and helpless repeatedly be abused by someone who so easily could kill her.”
Both Zara and LL paled instantly and Lois knew she had struck a nerve. From the tension in the room, she knew both Kryptonian men were upset by her words as well, but they held it together well.
“We need ground rules,” growled LL. “You have to remember, I'm in charge.”
“I won't say that we aren't going to create conflict,” said Clark, finally speaking up. “None of us are militarily minded, so the whole 'following orders' thing probably isn't going to work. But we won't assume we know better,” he promised, frustrated that she wasn't even looking at him.
“Can you promise their good behavior,” she asked him, her eyes fixed on a wall. It would have been rude and dismissive if the men didn't know of her past. Clark knew it was a mix of fear and disdain that caused her to behave this way.
“I'd vouch for us,” he said, indicating the group. “We aren't ill intentioned. We mean well and we want to help. We are highly motivated to help Lois. I love her. I think they do too. And we also are collectively appalled at the conditions in your world. All together, we want your world to be free, and we know that our experience in this type of thing is very limited compared to yours.”
“Your aid is at my disposal,” she hissed. “No running off and doing heroics. You may have to see and endure the suffering of others in order to keep the truth of your existence a secret, as you are valuable only if Lord Kal doesn't know of your existence. As soon as he knows that there are two doppelgangers with his abilities in our world, you can well believe he will pursue you with a single-mindedness. The same goes for you two,” she indicated Lois. “While the two Kal-Els are obviously extra fire power, you two are virtually useless. Value detraction as opposed to value-add.”
“Mostly I agree,” said Lane. “But having us around to … “
“Shill?”
“What?”
“Shill for them. Like pretending to be a customer when you actually are part of the company who makes a product.”
“I know what 'shill' means. I just don't -”
“We prop them up by our presence,” said Lois to Lane. “Our acceptance of both Kal-Els gives credence to the fact that they aren't dangerous, even if we ourselves won't yet have much credibility.”
“You will,” said Zara to Lois. “Once people learn that you were the one in our world. But you,” she looked at Lane, “might simply be an object of scorn. Believe me when I tell you, the resistance hates Kryptonians in general. Ching and I are feared and barely tolerated. It's only Lois's acceptance of our help that enables us to be a part of this.”
“You bring more to the table than they do,” growled LL.
“And you see that,” said Zara. “It took some doing for us to convince you, and you are very logical.”
LL didn't even try to argue. She just gazed wordlessly at her unlikely friend and ally.
“Lois here has – credibility. She has suffered, and she has been an effective leader. Her own trials have turned her into something of a legend,” she said, indicating LL. “Her friendship with me is not considered to be treasonous in any way because everyone knows that Lois hates Kryptonians and would only trust me if she truly felt that I was trustworthy. Lois doesn't trust many Kryptonians. Don't think she will work easily with you two,” she told Clark and Kent. “It's likely she will give off vibes of hatred. It's likely others will pick up on that as well. You will create some amount of emotional turmoil in our world and you will have to endure much without allowing your own emotional responses to take over."
“Then why have them help us,” LL begged Zara to clarify. “Seems like they will harm more than help just by existing.”
“They look exactly like him – or they could if they tried to emulate him. That's immensely powerful. While they will upset the general public, they also give off the same body language emanations that humans do. There is no 'culture clash' as it were.”
Clark flinched, remembering Lois's attempts at self-therapy. She knew what he was thinking and squeezed his hand gently, reminding him that to her, he didn't look exactly like Lord Kal.
“How do we know it's the right thing to do,” she asked Zara, only daring to appear undecided because of the great impact of the decision she would make.
“We have to free Kal-El,” Zara said. “One way or the other. It will be easier with more Kryptonians on our side. It will be easier with these two who are equally motivated. This Kal-El knows what it's like to deal with someone who fears him for what the other did,” she said, looking at Clark. “I trust he's learned to hold back his own visceral reactions to fear and hatred that belong to another man?”
Clark paled at her words, as did Lois. This was bringing back a lot of bad memories for them both.
“Clark endured my attempts at ruining his life with a lot of grace,” said Lois. “He never once asked me to stop my antil-Clark articles, nor did he ever try to convince me he wasn't a threat. He stayed out of my way unless absolutely necessary and he let his actions speak for him. And while this Clark,” she said with a smile at Kent, “doesn't have the same experiences, I believe he is more than capable of withstanding a lot and not allowing overt hatred of fear to overwhelm him.”
“So you vouch for them,” Zara said. “You trust both of them. Do you trust your own self,” she said, indicating Lane.
“Yes,” she said without hesitation. “Both of us have historically been likely to explode in the face of things that anger us... but we both have learned to temper that. I trust Lois.”
Lane smiled at her gratefully . She knew compared to both of her doppelgangers, she was a lightweight in terms of life experiences. She knew LL held her in scorn, but to hear Lois speak of her in these terms made her feel good inside.
“This will be very hard. We know that,” said Kent. “We know we might cause more problems initially than we can help resolve. But I accept that you are leader, and I will follow your leadership so long as you don't ask me to hurt people. You are Lois Lane, and I believe that you are well intentioned. I believe as a leader, you are strong and adept.”
“I second that,” said Clark, remembering how his own Lois had launched a long attack against his reputation but had called off her efforts as her commitment to bringing him down waned in the face of the fact that he wasn't living up to her expectations of being a threat.
“You don't know me,” hissed LL, angered and saddened by what they said. It hurt her that they could trust her when she knew she had sunk lower than low on more than one occasion. “I've done things... “
“That, I can believe,” said Kent. “I know your life is different from ours. Your trials and your responsibilities. “We won't always agree. We won't blindly follow if we don't, but we won't assert ourselves over you if we disagree. I can't … convince you of this, you'll just have to take that leap of faith.”
“I have no faith left,” she ground out.
“But I have some,” said Zara. “I recommend they help. The decision, of course, is yours.”
