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Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 966 |
Sorry this is so late! The Internet at our house is not working for some reason, so I'm posting this at my brother's--hope it comes through all right!
Thanks for reading and commenting despite the lateness!
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Frustrating. I want to shake Lois up. More soon. Laura
Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”
Caroline's "Stardust"
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Merriwether
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Merriwether
Joined: Nov 2010
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Love Lois' comment about Clark's disguises! I guess if Clark refuses to go with Superman that Lois will suffer. I love that Lois finds herself drawn to Clark even while Superman is in the room. You do a great job with subtlies here. We're seeing Lois slowly moving more towards Clark. There's little pieces suggesting all is not what it seems but it's going to take time to put it all together. "His Fortress of Solitude." Clark's stare became uncharacteristically intense. "You should ask him about it sometime." Yeah, Clark is trying to reveal to Lois that Superman isn't who she thinks he is. I thought the Fortress of Solitude was his tree house - though I guess it could be either. Joan
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Kerth
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Kerth
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I loved this part. Well done, delightful.
Framework4
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Feb 2008
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You know, I wonder if Clone Superman is becoming more like Clark, his progenitor. He seems to be developing more of a conscience.
Did the clone really know those police officers were corrupt, or did he just take Nigel to them because he was told to? And the fact that the clone injured L&C's bodyguards is a point against the theory that he is developing a conscience.
I wonder if Luthor has the globe - I don't think so, from Clark's words. I'm sure that Luthor wants the globe desperately. Did he ever have it at all in this universe?
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
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Wow! So much going on. Love that Lois is feeling the draw to Clark  stir Lois' suspicions again about neo Supes not being who he claims. Can't wait for more!! 
EvelynC
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
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Oh please, oh please, oh *please* let this be the moment when she realizes Clone!Supes is a fake! I can hardly bear it anymore -- aaagh!
~•~
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 6,142 Likes: 3 |
I was grateful for the reprieve. There was a bigger question on my mind at the moment, one that had hit suddenly and without warning. One that made me remember every chilling comment Clark had ever made concerning the returned Superman.
What had happened to Nigel? Are you finally seeing the bigger picture here, Lois? SuperClone is evil!!! Clark had told me Kryptonite was real. He had insisted it could hurt Superman--that it could kill him. Woman, you are *so* dense. And if anyone would have thought to get himself a chunk of Kryptonite, it'd be Luthor, I was sure of it. Yes, only he's not using against who you think he is. It was terribly unfair, I couldn't help but think, that the only options I could think of had Superman either hurt and dying...or a traitor. Give the woman a cookie, she's almost there! I turned on the TV and watched for any mention of Superman. Fear that he's listening in? "Then the big question," Henderson said slowly, "is what Kent did to make himself Luthor's obsession." Ok, maybe Henderson doesn't know that CK=S. "No. I called him, but he didn't get there in time." The statement, spoken aloud, paused me. The only other time Superman had been too late--in fact, had never shown up--was the time Trask had almost killed Clark in Smallville.
And the day Luthor captured Clark. Putting CK=S pieces together? Or further realization that SuperClone is evil? "I think I might know." With a heavy sigh, Henderson leaned forward again. In a pointed movement, he removed his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose. "As was said before, we've had inklings that Luthor isn't the philanthropist he appears to be. One of the reasons we've never been able to prove it--and a large part of why you two are being allowed to spearhead this investigation--is because there have been instances where cops have sold out."  I LOVE the description there. I'm picturing black-clad ninjas jumping out from behind ferns. "Are we exchanging secrets tonight?" Yes please! "I also found his ship--it had his S-symbol on it. And there was a tiny globe that responded to Superman's DNA. When I touched it, it warmed and changed from a map of Earth to a map of Krypton." Now Lois, I know you are dense, but think for a minute about what Clark just said. It responds to *Superman's* DNA *and* it responded to *Clark's* DNA too. Do I have to hit you over the head with a frying pan? "Where is it?" I looked around, which was silly, since the globe wouldn't miraculously appear out of thin air. Why not? The suit oftentimes does.  "Lois, you really should ask Superman about this. Ask him what color the globe turned when it changed. Ask him where his Fortress of Solitude is." Oooh, Clark's finally figured out a way to make Lois see that SuperClone is a fraud. I love it! More please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Battle On,
Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 6,142 Likes: 3 |
Just a thought, but *if* SuperClone is starting to break down and die...maybe a wild goose chase to the North Pole will use up his remaining energy and kill him?
Battle On,
Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: May 2003
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Wow, another chapter full of hints, promises, discoveries and wrong conclusions. *hits Lois over the head* I loved all of it, but especially the end about the globe and the Fortress. Considering how Clark seems to be looking at windows a lot here, maybe he really is laying a trap for the Other Superman. I mean... North Pole?... how not this Universe is that ? I think the Globe IS in the tree house and that Supes might promise Lois to fetch it and not find it. *cackles with evil laughter* And whatever's up with muddy Supes, I don't think he's about to die... maybe he's just angry that they start to think bad about him? Ahhhhhh... still so much mystery, so many hints and half truths... I fear the only remedy for my curiosity is: more!  ~Sira.
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
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 I just wrote a very long, detailed fdk post, and the cursor on my laptop highlighted it and deleted it! Stupid cursor jumping all over the place on me. So frustrating. Here we go again: "Clark." Superman's stern voice broke the moment as abruptly as if we had been splashed with cold water. <...> "I'd like to talk to you for a moment. Privately." So, this is where I had my "Duh!" moment. I had noticed Clark was weak after speaking with Supes in the last chapter, and I seemed to recall he had been weak after meeting up with Superman during his and Lois's walk the other day, hence my "Does Superclone have K on him?" After reading the above quote, I remembered. Clark didn't just *talk* to Superclone the other day, he flew off with him - and it was pretty obvious at the time that it was to Luthor and another dosing of K. (In my defense, I read that chapter over 2 weeks ago. One of the drawbacks of reading chapter by chapter, instead of in one fell swoop.) And, of course he was weak after talking to Superman in chapter 13 - given that just *before* talking to Superman, Nigel had exposed him to K! So, as Emily Litella (a.k.a. Gilda Radner) would say... "Never mind."  Mud was sloughed over much of his suit, obscuring the blue and weighing down the cape so that he seemed shorter than he usually looked.
<clip>
I stood to take my plate to the sink, but Clark stood at the same moment <...> It always surprised me when I realized how tall he was. My take on Clark's anger: I think it was something Luthor said, not something Superclone said. (I second D. Chak's motion. Please let Clark eventually tell Lois - and us - what is being said during his little trips with Superclone!) My take on the globe: Clark hid it, just as he said, in his Fortress of Solitude. He knows Supes is eavesdropping, so he give the wrong colors and location. I hadn't thought of him sending an ailing clone off to the North Pole to die, but that's an interesting idea. What I thought of was that he really does, as he says, want Lois to ask Superclone about it - he knows the clone will repeat back the wrong answers which he just overheard. I also have a theory as to when, who, and how Lois will discover the true colors and location of the globe. Time will tell how close (or far off) my theory is. I'm talking a lot about plot in my fdk, but I want you to know that - outstanding as I think the plot is - what really impresses me is the nuance and depth of emotion. All the subtle little things the characters say and do which speak volumes. Very well written. 
"Hold on, my friends, to the Constitution and to the Republic for which it stands. Miracles do not cluster and what has happened once in 6,000 years, may not happen again. Hold on to the Constitution" - Daniel Webster
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
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The only other time Superman had been too late--in fact, had never shown up--was the time Trask had almost killed Clark in Smallville.
And the day Luthor captured Clark. Ooh! So close to figuring it all out, Lois!! Just think on it a little more... you can do it... "Regardless," Superman stated intractably, "I give you my personal word that I will do anything you need to bring this monster down." He met my gaze. "Earlier, you asked if I would help you in your investigation. Now, I give you my answer--I will not rest until this matter is settled." Making me wonder what side 'Superman' is on? He seems to have a heart in him, even if he's a clone... but is he playing a game? Or was he played himself? "He?" I repeated as I stepped after him. "Who's 'he?'"
He tilted his head again, his entire countenance filled with impatient anxiety. "I have to go. He needs me." Another clue! Must be daddy Luthor calling back his favorite clone...
[QUOTE]"His Fortress of Solitude." Clark's stare became uncharacteristically intense. "You should ask him about it sometime." I think Lois Lane needs a Dr. Watson to her Sherlock to put all the clues together... Clark is definitely trying to tell her something with this! "And the Fortress? Where is it?"
Clark shrugged, something almost predatory in his sudden smile as he looked toward the windows. "The North Pole, of course." I wonder what the underlying menace in his tone is about... and this is more canon Superman, since on L&C, Clark's Fortress was in his parent's backyard. Interesting... actually, come to think of it... maybe that's the point? How to trap him in the lie? Excellent, as always! I feel like Lois is SO close to putting it all together! Maybe the hint about the globe/Fortress will be the last piece of the puzzle that she needs to see who the REAL Superman is! Can't wait for more!!
Reach for the moon, for even if you fail, you'll still land among the stars... and who knows? Maybe you'll meet Superman along the way.
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 6,142 Likes: 3 |
Vicki - D. Chak.??? I *love* it! makes me sound like a rockstar!!!!
Battle On,
Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
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Love love love love this story! Like everyone else, I am ready to slap Lois upside the head... The only other time Superman had been too late--in fact, had never shown up--was the time Trask had almost killed Clark in Smallville.
And the day Luthor captured Clark. I'm totally picturing Lois from HiM when she's trying to remember 'Buddy Love' and Clark's there just waiting for her to spit the words out...waiting and waiting and waiting... Clark: 'I'm Superman!' Lois: /disappointed in herself - 'I knew that!'
A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always
depend on the support of Paul.
-George Bernard Shaw
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Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 966 |
Hey, glad you're sticking with it despite your frustration, Laurach! Thanks! Thanks, scifiJoan! The exchange on disguises is one of my favorites; it just kind of snuck its way in there. And subtlety is what I'm really trying for--which is hard, since it doesn't come that naturally to me! Wow, that's a great comment to get, Framework4! Thanks! Superman is certainly growing as a character--ideally, they all are.  And, no, Luthor never had the globe; in fact, he doesn't even know about it since Jack never had a chance to steal, advertise, and sell it in this universe. Thanks for the feedback, IolantheAlias! I love hearing how you think things through, EvelynC. It always gives me a thrill to know that people not only read the story, but think on it and try to figure it out--though it does keep me working very hard! I really enjoyed writing Lois's slow transferral of affection to Clark, so I'm glad that's working for you. Sorry, Queen of the Capes--hope you don't give up! The revelation is coming! Ambiguity is the name of the game here, Deadly Chakram--your comment on that really made my day!  Clark's dialogue is very hard to write but incredibly fun--I always promise myself I'll never do a strictly set POV story again, but I always end up breaking it. I don't reply to all your comments, but please know that they always make me smile! I love your description of this chapter, Sira! Maybe that should be the little synopsis for the whole story. So glad you're eager for more! Thanks for taking the time to write out feedback, not once, but twice, Vicki! Thanks so much, Mozartmaid! Actually, the Fortress is very important--though I definitely can't say anything more than that!   Stephnachia, at your word picture of Lois in the honeymoon suite! I'm delighted that you love the story! Thanks, everyone, for the great feedback!
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
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Hi. Back again for something I forgot to highlight when I gave my feedback: The phrases ran through my mind like a mantra that soothed, a litany that promised things I had first realized I wanted while listening to careless words dropped so tenderly as I restlessly slept in a blackened cell. I love this sentence! For so many reasons. "A mantra that soothed," "a litany," promising things she'd only just realized she wanted. But most of all for the phrase "careless words dropped so tenderly." That just stopped me dead in my reading. Not 'tender words dropped carelessly', but 'careless words dropped tenderly.' What a difference that turn of phrase makes! 
"Hold on, my friends, to the Constitution and to the Republic for which it stands. Miracles do not cluster and what has happened once in 6,000 years, may not happen again. Hold on to the Constitution" - Daniel Webster
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066 Likes: 31 |
What had happened to Nigel?
Superman had promised he'd take him to the police--I was sure of that. My headache hadn't been so bad that I'd forget something like that. Now, that would be a nice twist! No, no, Ms. Lane, you must be mistaken. I was never in that warehouse. See, even Superman can't remember seeing me there. Or helping you, as it is. And yet...Superman didn't lie. He told the truth. So if he had dropped off Nigel...where was the Englishman now? What could have gone wrong? Yes... what could have gone wrong... And was Superman all right?
Clark had told me Kryptonite was real. He had insisted it could hurt Superman--that it could kill him. /slaps forehead/ Of course! Nigel *also* had Kryptonite in addition to the anti-Clark. It was terribly unfair, I couldn't help but think, that the only options I could think of had Superman either hurt and dying...or a traitor. Poor Lois. Superman's dead. Again! "It's not that complicated," I said.  Michael
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Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 966 |
Thanks, Vicki! Actually, I did reword that line twice, but I don't remember if I changed the part you drew out--glad you liked it so much! LNN faking a Superman rescue, Darth Michael? That would be bad, wouldn't it? Yes, I can very easily see Luthor obsessing over Clark Kent if Superman hadn't shown up. Luthor needs a hobby, and Clark's integrity makes him a target. Lois does have a hard time connecting Clark to Superman, doesn't she? It made sense to me--hope it doesn't scare everyone else away.  There's an awful lot of shrugging smileys. Hmm...I'm really hoping that's the good kind of 'I want to see where the story is going' and not 'None of this makes any sense; I can't read any further.' Thanks for catching up (almost) and sticking with me!
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
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Actually, I did reword that line twice, but I don't remember if I changed the part you drew out--glad you liked it so much! Well, I'll confess that after I wrote the feedback, it occured to me... what if it was just a typo? But I left my comment because if it *was* mistake, it was a most fortuitous one! It's good to know you wrote and re-wrote until you got it exactly the way you wanted it, because it was a great sentence!
"Hold on, my friends, to the Constitution and to the Republic for which it stands. Miracles do not cluster and what has happened once in 6,000 years, may not happen again. Hold on to the Constitution" - Daniel Webster
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066 Likes: 31
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066 Likes: 31 |
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Originally posted by AntiKryptonite: <strong>Lois does have a hard time connecting Clark to Superman, doesn't she? It made sense to me--hope it doesn't scare everyone else away. Michael
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