|
|
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 921
Features Writer
|
OP
Features Writer
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 921 |
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,761
Pulitzer
|
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,761 |
The title is very fitting with the story - Lois really couldn't tell night from day with all the choices she made, it seems.  Very nice piece, anonpip! Your writing is great  I enjoyed this fresh view of how things could have happened very much. Poor Clark is such a kind soul and this is the only time in the show we see her be so cruel towards someone he loves - you did a great job working with that, and I love how he came to realize he was guilty too, for lying to her. He's on such an emotional rollercoaster he can go from vindictive to guilty in a matter of seconds, but you made the transition seamlessly. Great to see Lois acting a bit smarter than she did in the show, as well. Also, she was so sweet when she came to tell Clark she loved him! Gave me a great feeling there. Thanks for sharing this lovely piece! Keep up the good work!
What we've got here is failure to communicate...
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 6,142 Likes: 3
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
|
|
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 6,142 Likes: 3 |
How could she just act like nothing happened when she had broken my heart earlier today? And twice over to boot. Poor Clark. I never could stay angry with her. And that's why we love him. It was two months ago again. We were best friends and Lois felt comfortable coming to my apartment at any time of the night. To her, yes. To poor Clark, however...  We didn’t work together anymore – heck, I didn’t even have a job. I had told her I loved her six hours ago. She had told me she loved me four hours later. And then an hour after that… she’d accepted another man’s proposal of marriage. Yikes! I mean, I know it's canon and all, but to see it spelled out like that just sort of slaps you in the face a little. And since I’d go off and live in a cave in the Arctic before I ever took a paycheck from Lex Luthor, that wasn’t happening anytime soon. What, no crystalline palace in the Arctic? Caves are so last century, Clark! I nodded my head, not able to tell her it was okay, but wanting to erase the look of pain from her face. That's because Superman doesn't lie. “Don’t hate me for this, okay?” This is not going to go over well, it is? Is she going to ask her to be the Man of Honor? Unless of course, the ordinary man was me… <becomes hopeful> Was she upset to learn that Superman kept secrets from her? Was she planning to find out what those were? Yes? And yes??? Strangely, that didn’t leave me feeling the fear it once would have. Instead it made me feel… vindicated. I couldn’t help it. The idea of Lois discovering that Superman was just me, and it turned out she wouldn’t love him if he was just an ordinary man, made me feel strangely happy. Like I had won something. What, I had no idea. The right to point out to her that she had been wrong? Would that make either of us feel better? I just love this. “Not like you,” she said quietly, wondering. “Why couldn’t he be more like you?” <heart breaks> “I love you, Clark,” Lois said softly. “I know it’s not in the way you want, but I do love you. So much.” <heart breaks again> Who cared if she was marrying another man in a matter of days when she had shared so much of herself with me? What had I done in return to earn her love? Lie to her at every turn, tease her with promises from Superman and then rebuff her for preferring the superhero to the ordinary man? I didn’t deserve her, and her marrying the man I hated more than anyone I’d ever met was no more than I deserved. Oh Clark, stop being so hard on yourself. “Can I come in?” she asked softly. Nice little parallel here to the beginning. “I made a mistake,” Lois said as I came over to the couch, looking at me with tear-filled eyes. “I chose wrong, and now I’m afraid… I was stupid, and I don’t know if there’s a good way out.” <perks up> “Nothing. It’s not Lex. It’s me. I’ve been stupid.” Um, actually it's both of you. <sits back down> “You thought Lex Luthor was safe?”  Too soon, though, way too soon – before I even had the smallest taste of her lips – I remembered. Erm...this is the part where you share a soul shattering kiss with Lois, Clark. “No,” I said. “I do love you, Lois. So much. But you were right. I can hurt you. And I have already.” Revelation time? “Oh,” she said suddenly, her face smoothing out. “’Oh,” she said again in consternation. “’Under the circumstances, I don’t see how I can,’” she quoted me. “Of course you couldn’t,” she said, mostly to herself. Ding! Get the girl a cookie! “For what?” she asked me through her tears. “For keeping what has to be the world’s most important secret from me? Or for being stupid enough to fall in love with someone as heartless as me?” Love it! You definitely hit it out of the park with the combination of heart break and WAFFiness. I loved reading it, and seeing our heroes struggling with their mistakes. And I love how Lois sees that she has made mistakes too. Great work!
Battle On,
Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
|
|
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 9,509 |
Beautiful! Absolutely beautiful.   Words aren't enough. You made me cry. You gave me goosebumps. And you made me smile. (REALLY, Lois? Lex was a safe choice?) I felt like I was inside Clark's skin feeling everything nuance of pain that he was feeling. Every broken heart shattered. Every ounce of guilt magnified. Every twist of his gut. You showed us all why we love him so. Only Clark would still love Lois after all the pain she inflicted upon him and still didn't think he deserved her. Now, there's a man who knows how to forgive. How could we not love him? Yes, these are the words that Lois SHOULD have said, but didn't. I'm very glad you made her say them. Thank you. Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.
VirginiaR.
"On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling"
---
"clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 4,425 Likes: 1
Pulitzer
|
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 4,425 Likes: 1 |
Hi anonpip, not exactly WAFFY, I don’t think. I beg to differ there. The story provoked numerous emotions in me, and WAFF was definitely among them. I liked how you reversed the typical Lois and Clark dialogue -- having Clark angry with himself and having Lois explain to him all the reasons why he shouldn't have told her earlier. The only suggestion for improvement I would have would be a correction of the typo in the following: It’s a responsibility you can’t take likely, Clark. Thanks for a terrific story. Joy, Lynn
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 12
Blogger
|
|
Blogger
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 12 |
I agree with Lynn, it's definitely WAFFY.
I admire Clark, really, because I know I couldn't be so generous if I were so hurt and angry - and I don't think I'm the only one ! Often in the show, I prefer Lois, maybe because I feel close to her nature. But they matched perfectly, and that's why the dynamism of the couple is so efficient - and it's probably for the same reason that I prefer the seasons one and two.
Anyway, I'm exactly like all of you, and I felt as if something was missing during the episode with the almost wedding. I like the way you express the reasons why Lois acts like this - I think it's true, even if she never told it in the show. And I was surprised not to be ennoyed by Clark's feelings. On the contrary, I shared his pain. Nuances are described very well indeed. And you show him so noble that I softened as Lois did. In fact, you're very fair with him. The two characters wouldn't blame you for this story.
Besides, it's kind of pleasant to see the revelation part without an angry Lois. I so love the angry Lois, but this version is sweet and, again, very fair. Because Lois is often unfair - I remember when she's mad at im because he lied to her although she's lying to him all the time. I like the fact that Lois realizes that it's her fault too if Clark didn't tell her the truth. How could he, when she's acting so differently with him and his alter ego ? And Clark had to realize that he pushed her to have a crush on Superman. I'm not the better to judge English writing, but I liked yours. It was very clear and nice.
Oh, and I agree with Lois about the safety of Luthor, although it is very funny to read. She can defend herself against anything but feelings.
I'm sorry for this long explanation, but I thought I could work on my English in the same time =D
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1,724 Likes: 1
Merriwether
|
|
Merriwether
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 1,724 Likes: 1 |
I like this! This is a great idea: “I think I threw myself at Superman as I thought he was safe, Clark. And Lex for the same reason.” I'm loving the way you show Lois putting the pieces together. It always bothered me that she would consider marrying a man she didn't love. I'm enjoying your explanation: “Because I am in love with someone. Someone real, who could really break my heart. I think I thought if I could get together with Superman or marry Lex, I could prevent myself from falling any further, from getting my heart broken,” she said softly. What a fabulous revelation: “Actually,” she said, stepping back to look me more fully in the face, “did anyone ever tell you…” Her face was scrunched up in concentration and I felt my heart speed up again as I realized that she was realizing it herself. Even without the right hairstyle, or the suit, or doing something silly like flying around the apartment. And I love that Lois understands why he didn't tell her: “Of course you didn’t!” she shouted at me. “You can’t go telling people you’re Superman!” She was still shouting and nearly shaking as she looked at me. “Your life as Clark would be over. Your parents would be in danger. Me, Perry, Jimmy… everyone you care about.” Excellent story! Joan
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,578 Likes: 10
Pulitzer
|
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 2,578 Likes: 10 |
not exactly WAFFY, I don’t think. I beg to differ there. The story provoked numerous emotions in me, and WAFF was definitely among them. I agree. I was afraid to read this story after the warning, but there was no reason. I found it an emotional and beautiful fic and it gave me a very WAFFy sensation.  I loved the way they both recognized their own faults and forgave each other. Definitely a WAFFy story. Andreia
"My wife's love is what unites Krypton and Earth in my heart. Without it, without her, I truly would be in hell."
~ Superman: Man of Tomorrow #15
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 3,883
Pulitzer
|
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 3,883 |
Hi Anonpip, I agree with everyone else, wonderfully WAFFy.  Well done! 
Herb replied, “My boy, I never say … impossible.” "Lois and Clarks" My stories can be found herekj
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 4,058
Pulitzer
|
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 4,058 |
I loved it! What a nice change of pace on Lois's take on things. She is right. he could not have come clean with her being so blinded by dazzle. great job. laura
Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”
Caroline's "Stardust"
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,837
Pulitzer
|
|
Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 2,837 |
A great take on a familiar incident. I'm glad Lois figured her own motives out. Kudos!  Artemis
History is easy once you've lived it. - Duncan MacLeod
Writing history is easy once you've lived it. - Artemis
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8
Blogger
|
|
Blogger
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 8 |
Lurking reader here! I had to speak up because I dont want it to be over!
Ditto definitely to everything that has been said before. I really enjoyed the fact that Lois could take a look at herself and figure it out, because season 1 Lois wasn't that trustworthy. Also I feel vindicated by Lois, (well, you) in thinking that she clung so hard to the fantasy of Lex or Superman because there was no way for there to be a real relationship with either.
You made me feel Clark's pain, as well as his eventual joy. Well Done.
So all that's left to say is,
More please???? Can I get a 2/?)javascript:void(0)
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066 Likes: 31
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
|
Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,066 Likes: 31 |
Hi Nancy! “Clark, open up!” she demanded, for at least the fourth time. Oh this is fun! Especially since it’s the n-th time that I got a “Clark, open up” in the past few weeks with my Board and Archive reading. For some reason, indomitable Lois just doesn’t get old. How could she think it was okay? Still okay, I mean? To just show up at one in the morning on my doorstep? After she rejected me and then threw herself at Superman? How could she? Oh Clark. Do you *really* think she’s *thinking* about it? I felt angrier at Lois than I ever had before as I stormed to my door, intent on letting her know how unfair this was. How cruel. How could she just act like nothing happened when she had broken my heart earlier today? Oooooooh! I never could stay angry with her. Oh, Clark… No way would Lex Luthor be okay with his wife at my apartment in the wee hours of the morning. Yes. Much safer to have a live-in boy-toy. “What?” I asked her cautiously. If she expected easy forgiveness for breaking my heart, what could she possibly be about to do now that she would be worried about?  /waits for Lois to say ‘Max’ or ‘Dan’. Or…’Jimmy’. There was silence in the room for a second while the Earth tilted on its axis and everything but Lois’ face seemed out of focus.  Michael
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 921
Features Writer
|
|
OP
Features Writer
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 921 |
Thank you all for the kind words - and I'm very happy to hear that this qualifies as WAFFY. It felt a bit dark to me, but then maybe that's just 'cause Clark was in a bad place for most of this, so I needed to be a bit down to write his POV. I had hoped the happy ending would redeem it, though.
You all deserve much more detailed thanks than this, but I'm not feeling very well, so please forgive me. I do really appreciate the time you take to leave such detailed feedback.
|
|
|
|
