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Joined: Feb 2008
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Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Feb 2008
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You're the first and only person I've ever wanted to tell, Lois." He let out a relieved laugh. "I'm Clark and I'm Superman and I'm in love with you." What a marvelous revelation! Short, sweet, to the point, and it fits so wonderfully with the story. Awesome. Like the fic.
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Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 1,200 |
So wonderful!! I think this fic may be even better than the first one -- all those sweet reveals about what Lois was thinking, making the dialogue just that much more delicious: She'd already thought through this logic at least a thousand times. Superman couldn't have an acknowledged girlfriend. But surely Clark could? And if Superman was Clark's secret then… "Maybe I could be your secret girlfriend?" "Please, I want to hear you say it, just once." Please, Clark, trust me. In the original, this came off a little like 'oh Lois stop throwing yourself at Superman' -- but knowing that she knows -- pure waffy heaven! And the whole ending -- wonderful!! Loved it all!
Reach for the moon, for even if you fail, you'll still land among the stars... and who knows? Maybe you'll meet Superman along the way.
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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'Deadline' was the biggest turkey ever made. Right. Title. But surely Clark could? And if Superman was Clark's secret then… "Maybe I could be your secret girlfriend?" He gave her a slow once-over that made her knees wobble. Bad Clark. Using x-ray vision like that. Clark had just crossed a major line and he had no clue that she was on to him. You're mine, Clark Kent, she thought. You just don't know it yet. ‘My bed, now. Or I’ll write an exclusive’? But he had stayed outside on the sidewalk, hadn't he? He had felt an urgent, human need? It was time to come clean. "What if I already know the whole truth?" So, time to make love, then? "You really ought to try and tell me nothing but the truth from now on," she teased. Uuuummm… "I know we're turning over a new leaf regarding honesty, but if tonight doesn't turn out to be perfect, it's okay if you lie and say it was." You know, I’ve read the FDK (Virginia’s always so much so (sic) fun Michael
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 2,367 |
Good morning! Iolan - Thank you! I squirm at long, drawn-out revelations myself. Maybe it's because I hate confrontations. Mozart - In the original I had Lois very calm and cool instead of flirtatious. It should have been a signal to Clark that something was up, but he was a little preoccupied at the time. I'm glad you liked the story - thanks! Michael - Ah, there you are! I've been looking forward to reading over your shoulder! Right. Title. Another thing I need to think about. I got lucky and Virginia suggested a perfect title. Feel free to use it. They chose her using cup-size as selection criteria? Bwaaa! It's a darn good thing I wasn't drinking anything at the time. Bad Clark. Using x-ray vision like that. Heh. If he had, I'm sure he would have reflected on it at length in his version. So, time to make love, then? Sure. And the first thing they'll take off is Linda's lipstick. Let’s do it again, soon /sets up camp on dark side/ If you knew what lay in store, you'd give up camping and just move in. Thanks to everyone who's commented. It is very greatly appreciated!
Lois: You know, I have a funny feeling that you didn't tell me your biggest secret.
Clark: Well, just to put your little mind at ease, Lois, you're right. Ides of Metropolis
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Ah, there you are! I've been looking forward to reading over your shoulder! Yeah I only can do about one such FDK per day on average so I have to make sure I keep up with serialized stories, then come the vignettes Stupid RL. And good thing I don't have enough brain for writing ATM. I got lucky and Virginia suggested a perfect title. Feel free to use it. I already made a note in my ideas file. Bwaaa! It's a darn good thing I wasn't drinking anything at the time. I *know*. People keep telling me I'm bad for their hardware. Would even put a general warning into the siggy. But when you reach the siggy, you've already managed to neither choke on your beverage nor use it to short out your keyboard, monitor, or laptop in general so it kind of defeats the purpose. I'm not going to quote the whole thing back to you, but I laughed until it hurt at the succession of quips Glad you got a few laughs out of it. Funny, how you where thinking her nightgown from BatP/HoL (argh, which is it?). Anyhow, actually, was going for silken veils since that's her favorite show-up-and-surprise-Clark outfit, while the nightgown is for Superman to show up on an arranged stay-in-date. Maybe that's why she doesn't outright ask him if he's ever kissed Linda when he first shows up - she's afraid of what his answer will be? True. So very true. And I'll just say I was thinking the very same thing while reading. There's at least a 33.3333333333333% chance that that's true. quote: Drop dress strap?
HA! I said stall him, not kill him! His heart would stall? Doesn't that qualify? Also, thank you for clapping at one my favorite lines from the story - that Linda lies just because it's a Tuesday. You're welcome. Tuesday references really are a cue-card for me. /blames Joss Whedon/ My absolute favorite line has not been quoted back to me yet (and I was almost positive you'd spot it). You quote enough, there's a reasonable probability to hit it? And Michael
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Jun 2011
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Fabulous companion piece. Loved seeing this from Lois' perspective- her realization, figuring out what she can do to mess with him, drawing it out of him... Really well done!
Nothing spoils a good story like the arrival of an eye witness. --Mark Twain
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Mar 2006
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Mouse - Having Lois mess with Clark when she knows his secret is one of my favorite things. Any time I get a chance for her to get a little bit of payback, I take it. Thanks! Michael - This is a double-edged sword. I love the long FDK, but it makes me sad to think you're so busy replying to all these stories that you aren't working on your own. There has to be a happy medium somewhere. I *know*. People keep telling me I'm bad for their hardware. Would even put a general warning into the siggy. But when you reach the siggy, you've already managed to neither choke on your beverage nor use it to short out your keyboard, monitor, or laptop in general so it kind of defeats the purpose. I'm pretty sure that everyone else is like me - as soon as I see your name, it's like the plane is about to land. I dispose of all beverages and snacks, make sure my seat is in the upright and locked position and that my seatbelt is low and snug across my lap. Funny, how you where thinking her nightgown from BatP/HoL (argh, which is it?). Anyhow, actually, was going for silken veils since that's her favorite show-up-and-surprise-Clark outfit, while the nightgown is for Superman to show up on an arranged stay-in-date. Well, sure! That's because you said "blue silk", not "blue chiffon". I'm pretty sure the blue nightgown was in BatP since she wouldn't answer Lex until she knew what Superman wanted. True. So very true. And I'll just say I was thinking the very same thing while reading. There's at least a 33.3333333333333% chance that that's true. Wow - only a one in three chance that you're telling the truth? <sigh> Men. :rolleyes: His heart would stall? Doesn't that qualify? Yes, I suppose it does. You're welcome. Tuesday references really are a cue-card for me. /blames Joss Whedon/ Aha! I've only seen maybe two episodes of Buffy, but I do adore me some Firefly and Dr. Horrible. You quote enough, there's a reasonable probability to hit it?
Lois: You know, I have a funny feeling that you didn't tell me your biggest secret.
Clark: Well, just to put your little mind at ease, Lois, you're right. Ides of Metropolis
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,181 Likes: 29 |
I love the way Lois's mind works in the early part of the fic. She starts out being jealous of Linda and Superman, but then she sort of morphs into being jealous of Linda and Clark. It's a great pointer to the revelation when she discovers that Superman *is* Clark. Corrina.
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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I love the long FDK, but it makes me sad to think you're so busy replying to all these stories that you aren't working on your own. No, if I'd actually manage to get started, FDK would only slow down writing. It's the initial kick start that's the problem. /goes checking spring-loaded boot mechanisms/ Also, if things get really bad, I could always offer to BR. More feedback, less public FDK though Michael
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Mar 2006
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Corinna - Thank you! I agree, if there's one thing Clark can be counted on for, it's that he will put Lois first or try to find a way to comfort her when she's hurting. And, if there's one thing that Lois can be counted on for, it's that she considers both Superman *and* Clark hers. I did so love the early seasons when she'd be jealous, but try to paint it as a different emotion. Michael - You need a kick? What kind of kick?
Lois: You know, I have a funny feeling that you didn't tell me your biggest secret.
Clark: Well, just to put your little mind at ease, Lois, you're right. Ides of Metropolis
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Boards Chief Administrator Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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. . . Ow... Drop everything and watch it! I cannot stress that strongly enough. /goes checking out title on IMDB and wiki. Oh. I see. Plus, it's only 45 minutes. So, doesn't really cut into hypothetical writing time, too. It aired on Sunday nights, at least it did in the US. Oh well. You win some, you lose some. I'd love to see Linda try. That poor girl hasn't got a prayer of even turning Clark's head. It's the journey that counts? Plus, anything goes when it drives Lois insane? Michael
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Jan 2010
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Sue, both parts are wonderful as always. Looking forward for more stories from you
KateB
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Mar 2006
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Michael - Anything goes? 'Cause I can think of lots of ways to drive Lois insane. It's always nice to see a lurker come out to play. Thank you so much! I'm delighted you enjoyed the stories. My eternal thanks to everyone who's left comments. I'm in a kind of FDK sugar shock now. And it's lovely... You all helped me immensely. My mojo returned and I got a lot of writing/polishing done on my other story. THANK YOU!
Lois: You know, I have a funny feeling that you didn't tell me your biggest secret.
Clark: Well, just to put your little mind at ease, Lois, you're right. Ides of Metropolis
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 186 |
A shock wave of recognition went through Lois. For everything the movie had got wrong - and basically the entire movie was one big lie - there was truth in that moment. Even the terrible acting couldn't hide the fact that Linda had gotten it right. That gesture was exactly - exactly - the way Superman had checked on Lois after more than one rescue. Those had been private moments, an intimacy she thought she had shared only with Superman. All this time she had believed she was special to him, at least in those moments. That scene was evidence that Superman had done the same thing to Linda. Poor Lois, what a horrible feeling. The nerve of that woman! She had been giving air kisses to everyone else. It was like she had been saving that mark of ownership solely for Clark. And he had simply stood there like a dope and let Linda kiss him. He could have leaned away, but no… I love that Lois gets so worked up that she includes Clark's behavior towards Linda while on assignment as part of the betrayal. And then that she takes it to this level of irrationality. Hee! And just like that! He hadn't gone anywhere. He'd known she was upset and he had stuck around because that's what a friend did. In the face of such a huge discovery, I like that she processes this so early on. I adore reading Lois' thoughts throughout this entire scene with Superman, especially once the kissing starts. For half a second she thought about asking him what his real name was. Then she realized that might be too much, too soon. She'd already got the truth about Linda out of him. This might be the perfect time to get the truth about herself. "Do you love me?" Good choice. Lois felt almost faint. She had to give him credit. Clark had never used Superman to seduce her - and there had been many occasions when he absolutely could have. It was time to come clean. "What if I already know the whole truth?" Love. "That's why it's a good thing this isn't a movie." Lois could feel his smile on her skin. "Because I like to think there will definitely be more than one perfect night." Woohoo! Perfect companion piece. Great work, Sue!
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Joined: May 2011
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 6,142 Likes: 3 |
For the first half hour of the movie, Lois was in heaven. 'Deadline' was the biggest turkey ever made. Oooh! So, different POV, not an epilogue. For a few brief, shining moments all was right with the world. <claps> That scene was evidence that Superman had done the same thing to Linda. Oh, Lois. Lois spent the rest of the movie taking deep breaths and thinking of inventive ways for Linda to disappear. Well, she *does* know a guy who knows guys. It must have really happened. Poor Lois. In truth, Clark had been on assignment, but that still didn't soften the memory for Lois. Awww. The faint red smudge of Linda's lipstick on his left cheek was a constant reminder of his perfidy. Though, it *is* a little strange he didn't duck into the men's room to remove it. Ah well! It was like she had been saving that mark of ownership solely for Clark. I really like this. All the way up the stairs Lois couldn't stop herself from picturing Clark and Linda together. Love the slow progression here. First, she's upset about the Superman kiss. Then, it morphes into being upset over Linda and Clark. Wonderful. Even if she knew where Superman lived, Lois doubted very much that she could show up late at night with a pizza and hang out with him. "That's why it's a good thing this isn't a movie." Lois could feel his smile on her skin. "Because I like to think there will definitely be more than one perfect night." Go, Clark!! "I mean you," she told him earnestly. "Not Superman. I love you, Clark." Really loved both sides of this story! Well done! Brava!
Battle On, Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Okay, not very reassuring, so either Lois doesn't think she'll be perfect tonight either, or she's still torturing Clark, or she doesn't realize that she just kicked that pooor v.... very patient man in the crotch, which won't give either one of them a perfect evening -- self-fulfilling destiny. Maybe she should wash his face first, that way neither of them will be reminded of Linda during the rest of the evening and that will make it perfect. Not how I saw it, Virginia. I saw it as a) perfect is boring. And b) *practice* makes perfect. So, she's really just opening the door for lots more nights where they make love.
Battle On, Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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OP
Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Originally posted by Deadly Chakram: <strong> Not how I saw it, Virginia.
VirginiaR. "On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling" --- "clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Originally posted by VirginiaR: <strong> </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Originally posted by Deadly Chakram: <strong> Not how I saw it, Virginia.
Battle On, Deadly Chakram
"Being with you is stronger than me alone." ~ Clark Kent
"One little spark of inspiration is at the heart of all creation." ~ Figment the Dragon
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Kerth
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Kerth
Joined: Mar 2006
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Look at this! I wander away for a couple of days and the thread fills up with all kinds of lovely comments! (Psst - check your email...) I love that Lois gets so worked up that she includes Clark's behavior towards Linda while on assignment as part of the betrayal. And then that she takes it to this level of irrationality. I don't think you can often use the words "rational" and "Lois Lane" in the same sentence. She has amazing leaps of logic but she tends to use her emotions more than she'd ever admit to anyone (including herself). DC - You came back for the second half! Yay! I'm glad you liked both stories. Though, it *is* a little strange he didn't duck into the men's room to remove it. To be fair to Clark, he wiped at it and then Lois did, so he didn't realize there was still a little left. Oh! Love it! Clark thinks it's the Superman kiss; she really means the implied affair with Clark. Brilliant! Thanks! That was one of the chief reasons a second story was necessary. And I'll bet *that* makes her feel like a big winner. It does indeed. It's better than gloating - she knows something Linda never will. Usually, it's Clark who's the master of the dual meaning. I love that Lois gets to be the one doing that here. Me, too! I love writing Clark's double meanings, but writing one for Lois is even more fun. I saw it as a) perfect is boring. And b) *practice* makes perfect. So, she's really just opening the door for lots more nights where they make love. Yes, exactly! Then Virginia said: Sue changed the line, I see, since my note.I did?!? I remember making a mental note to review it and telling Virginia that I would try to shade it so it was more obvious they were teasing each other, but I don't remember actually changing anything. So I scrolled up to where Virginia quoted the lines in her FDK and opened a second window to look at the story… Nope, no change. Sorry, I never tweaked it. I wasn't sure how to do it. I'm open to suggestions, if anyone has one.
Lois: You know, I have a funny feeling that you didn't tell me your biggest secret.
Clark: Well, just to put your little mind at ease, Lois, you're right. Ides of Metropolis
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Nobel Peace Prize Winner
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OP
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Hmmmm. I guess you're right (as you would know). I was going by the lines that DC quoted which we higher up in the story.
VirginiaR. "On the long road, take small steps." -- Jor-el, "The Foundling" --- "clearly there is a lack of understanding between those two... he speaks Lunkheadanian and she Stubbornanian" -- chelo.
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