Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic FDK - Wrong Clark (49/??)

Not even a twisted vignette? Hmmmm. We are coming in towards Halloween again, aren't we? Bwaahahaha.

Actually, it was last year's Halloween challenge short story I wrote that inspired Another Lois, so I guess I better be careful.

But that's what would make it really scary, when the really good become really evil.

Yep, no Globe with the spaceship. He doesn't know what happened to it.



More? Actually, it was my attempt at a short humorous story. Well, one out of two isn't bad.

Sounds interesting. I'll have to put it on my to-read list.

CLARK: But... but... but... I didn't "let" my Lois die. She was *already* dead. I just didn't "un-die" her. Thanks for reminding me of that, too. Like I wasn't depressed enough already.

Michael:

Hmmmm. So, it wasn't an attempt to get me to write faster by giving me less to respond to FDK-wise? PHEW. Speaking of which, I better get back and finish 60.

LOIS: And? You think I would have difficulty getting Clark down to his undies, otherwise? I don't.

CLARK: Um... guys. Sitting right here.

LOIS: Do you mind if I weigh my other options, first?

Don't worry, I'm sure you'll remember it once you reach it. You've seen it before.

CLARK: Gee, thanks, Lois. Wait. Were you talking about me, or Michael?

THOMAS: But according to my readings it wasn't emmitting gamma radiation. It shouldn't hurt the Hulk in the least.

See, I knew someone would appreciate an Evil Martha and Jonathan besides me.

CLARK: Technically, I tried to cheat on Lana with Lois. I don't deserve you.

LOIS: No, no you don't. And you wonder why I don't trust you.

LOIS: No, no, no Dan. And Clarks. ONE of you patrols and the OTHER one stays at home with me, except on Tuesdays when you'll both need to rescue me.

CLARK-1: I call Patrol!

CLARK-2: No, I called it!

CLARK-1: Nuh-uh. I did. It's mine.

CLARK-2: Fight you for it.

CLARK-1: You're on!

LOIS: Dan, I've changed my mind.

Oh, I didn't realize he officially had a name.

LOIS: Possibly. But he's pretty dense.

Oh, so it would actually be a good idea to use ‘Great part. More soon. Please? Michael’ as FDK?

Well, he…uh…he wouldn’t do that for Cat, so what makes you think he’d…you know, for you?

Aaaaaand? Born-again virgins from an alternate dimension don’t get a say in this.

Michael

Michael, I'm more than happy with *any* FDK you want to give me, especially if it doesn't cause you an anuerism.

/

LOIS: He looks cuter out of them.

EW:

LOIS: Don't worry, I've got this one!

Well, Clark was alive when Lois died. He could have gone and saved her in the Congo, if he had not been letting Lana tell him to hide his abilities. So yes, at some level, he let Lois die. OK, he had never met her, but still. Some theories are that in canon Clark was traveling around and in some way saved Lois in Congo.

OK, yes I am being too harsh. On the other hand I was just trying to explain why this Clark is so protective of this Lois.

You're blaming alt-Clark for not saving Lois before he knew she existed? Yeah, I'd say that's a bit harsh.

No, I’m not Lex-enough to come up with such an ingenious plan. /takes careful notes from EW lessons/

Michael

I was originally just trying to explain why he was so over protective of this Lois. I think I got carried away though.

I am pretty sure that at some level he does blame himslef for his Lois' death.

Michael:; Sometimes being an EW has drawbacks, like inspiring ER to do evil things.

CLARK: Er... Um... But wouldn't that seem a bit desperate?

Michael, have you met evil Lois?

Oh, that one.

/Psst. Lois, he'll model nude for you anytime, you don't need to join an art class./

LOIS: Huh... what?... Did you say something...

CLARK: I love playing the Roman and the Amazonian serving wench!

EW: Well, that explains a lot.

LOIS: Doesn't it? I always wondered why the more I hit him the more he stuck around.

CLARK:

Aaaaand?

/eyes too tight dress/ Nice!

Michael

CLARK: It isn't good to appear desperate, even when one is.

LOIS: Wow, it's a little hot in the city. We need to take off some clothing. Okay, Clark, you first.

Is that the one? Oh, wait, I wrote that already.

CLARK: So, this wasn't a Roman helmet you gave me? And Lois is beating me up for another reason besides role-playing?

CLARK: Actually, in fact, I do. More so, when I have my abilities, I've discovered.

CLARK:


No, I was thinking general purpose bicycle, motorcycle, ski, or army helmet. Just something to protect his noggin.

Michael

LOIS: Hmmmm. In that case, maybe we should make it a Roman helmet. I'm sure Lex has one he could borrow. As long as Clark wears those Roman military skirt (or would be kilt?) things. Hey, you know, Clark, with your helmet hair you almost look like...

CLARK: <nervously> Yes?

LOIS: Ralph.

LOIS: Don't you dare! <searches Smallville for Kryptonite so Clark never recovers fully>

Hmm… I think that reminds me of the Roman scene from Mel Brooks History of the World. They were testing the eunuch guards.

ER: So, you *don’t* like competition? I thought you thrived on winning? Or do you suddenly not wish to apply yourself to Clark?

Michael

[/Quote]

Lois you have no need to fear. Clark will chose you over every other woman.

We saw.

CLARK: Not really helping, guys.

LOIS: See! Was that too difficult?

CLARK: So, you want me to state the obvious? I thought you liked the chase. Who wants anyone without any mystery? Fine, if that's the way you want it. <on his knees> Lois, my darling, my sweetheart, you are my life, my joy, my...

LOIS: Okay, enough already. You've made your point.