<<< Chapter Five >>>
Lois stomped down the ramp to the bullpen and threw her purse into her desk drawer just before she slammed it shut. Any residual good feelings she’d retained from interviewing the Vollmer woman two days before had gone up in smoke. She looked around for Clark, but apparently she’d arrived at work before him on this day when she needed a listening ear. So she transferred some of her fury to him, just because she could.
How dare he not be available when she needed someone at whom she could vent!
The only other reporter in the room that early on that morning was Cat Grant, who was sitting at her desk and staring at Lois with mild alarm in her eyes. “Lois?” she ventured. “Are you okay?”
There! A convenient target for her remaining rage. “Oh, yeah,” Lois barked, “I’m just peachy!”
Cat seemed to shrink down into her chair. “I’m – I’m sorry.”
Lois didn’t know if Cat meant that she was sorry that Lois was in a bad mood or if she was sorry she’d asked the question. Or, perhaps, Cat was just sorry to be on the receiving end of Lois’ verbal assault. Lois let out a long sigh. “Cat, it’s my fault, not yours. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that. I’m the one who should be sorry.”
Mollified, Cat sat up again. “That’s okay. I’m sorry you’re having a bad morning.”
Lois stood still, closed her eyes, and counted to ten. Then she opened them and looked into the other woman’s face. “Do you have a minute?”
“Um – yeah. In fact, I have a couple of them.”
“Good.” Lois pulled a chair close to Cat’s desk and spoke in low tones. “My parents and my sister are flying into the city tonight.”
Cat waited for the next sentence, but Lois said nothing else. “Your parents and your sister are coming to visit you?”
Lois lifted her hands to the heavens for a moment. “Yes!”
Cat frowned. “And – you see this as a bad thing?”
“How could it be anything but a bad thing?”
“Um. I guess I’m missing something here, but I don’t understand why this is so bad.”
“Oh. I guess your parents are still getting along with each other, then?”
“Sure they do. And I get along just fine with them, too. In fact, I’m planning to go see them at Thanksgiving.”
Lois sighed. “You’re lucky. Mine fight.”
“Oh.” Cat hesitated, then asked, “With whom do they fight?”
Lois’ mouth tried to grin. “’With whom?’ Are you taking a refresher course on grammar?”
Cat returned the slight smile. “I almost said, ‘Who do they fight with?’ but you should never end a sentence with a preposition. That’s something up with which I cannot put.” She paused as Lois groaned and shook her head. “Now come on, spill it! With whom do your parents fight?”
Lois’ smile melted away. “With each other. With me. With Lucy. With each other over me or over Lucy. With me or with Lucy over each other.” She leaned back and crossed her arms. “Just your normal, screwed-up, dysfunctional nuclear family unit, every day getting one day closer to a critical mass meltdown.”
Cat nodded slowly and cautiously. “Right.” She leaned forward and put her hand on Lois’s arm. “Is there some way for me to help?”
Lois sighed, long and deep. “No, not really. Thanks for letting me vent. You may have saved Clark’s life this morning.”
“Glad to be of service. Although maybe you should wear a red hat or carry a warning sign when you’re really mad. I’ll know not to poke sticks through the bars at you.”
Lois laughed with Cat. “I’ll take it under advisement.” She stood and shook her head. “Now that I’m here and feeling better, I really should get to work.”
“Okay. You need to visit the ladies’ room first? I have this sudden urge to, uh – “
“I’m fine. You go ahead.”
“Okay. Hey, maybe we could do lunch today? Take your mind off your family?”
Lois tilted her head and considered the idea, then nodded. “Sure. You have those dual reservations at that fancy place today?”
“Sorry. Day after tomorrow. What if we hit your uncle’s diner?”
“Good idea. I’ll call him and warn him that you’re coming. He can put blinders on his waiters so they won’t be staring at you the whole time we’re there.”
*****
Cat verified that the restroom was empty except for her and went to the last stall. She locked the door behind her and pulled out her cell phone to dial the special number.
“Yes, Ms. Grant?”
The electronically filtered voice always startled her no matter how many times she heard it. “I’m checking in. The only thing I have right now is that Lois’ parents and sister are flying in tonight to visit her. She’s not happy about them coming.”
The voice waited a moment, then grated, “Is that all you have?”
“Yes. Sorry I don’t have more, but I wanted to let you know as soon as I could.”
“Hmm.” The voice was silent for another moment, then resumed. “I don’t know if this is useful or not, but I’m glad to have learned it from you and not from someone else. It gives me a bit more confidence in your trustworthiness.”
Cat glared at the phone for a moment. Trustworthiness? This from a murderer and blackmailer and who knew what else? She should flush the stinking phone right now! Without breaking the connection!
But she didn’t. She couldn’t and she knew she couldn’t. “Thank you,” Cat forced out. “Is there anything I need to know from your end?”
“No. Just keep watch on Kent and Lane. And let me know if White plans any more investigations.”
“Will do. What about my balance?”
The sigh from the other end of the line was distorted into a rapid series of clicks and pops. “Is that all that concerns you, Ms. Grant?”
“I am doing this for the money, remember?”
“Of course you are. Very well. Your total indebtedness has been reduced twenty-three percent from the original total. And before you ask, no, I am no longer charging you interest on it, now that you are actively employed by me.”
“Thank you. I’ll be in touch as soon as I learn anything else interesting.”
“Do that.”
The connection broke before Cat could respond. She closed the phone and nodded to herself. Arianna Carlin must be desperate to reduce her gambling debt by that much in just a few weeks. Luthor’s failed capture operation must have driven her deep underground, which meant that she was probably depending on a few spies like Cat to get her all her information.
She nodded to herself and opened the stall door. It was time to let Perry know how desperate Arianna was becoming.
*****
The day was long and uneventful for both Lois and Clark. Neither Superman nor Ultra Woman was called upon to make an appearance, so each of them was able to finish up their outstanding assignments and cultivate new leads from their desks as the job led them. So neither of them noticed the sky darkening until a huge clap of thunder exploded just outside the newsroom.
Cat scurried to the nearest window and peeked around the blinds. “Wow,” she said, “I was sure that one hit right beside us.”
Jimmy leaned close and peered out beside her. “It’s the ones that are the closest to you that either scare you the most or do the most damage. And you rarely see them coming.”
Something in the tone of his voice sounded odd to her. She frowned and caught his gaze, but he quickly turned away and turned on the TV in the far corner of the room. The local station was broadcasting a severe thunderstorm warning, specifically for the Metropolis International Airport.
Lois’ head jerked up. “Perry!” she called. “My family is coming in on a plane in just a few minutes! Mind if I take off now?”
Perry poked his head out of his office like a Mississippi box turtle. “Go ahead. Will you be okay, driving in the rain?”
Cat watched as some silent communication passed between Perry and Lois. Lois hesitated, then shook her head and said, “No problem, I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about me.”
“You sure, Lois?” queried Clark. “I can come along if you want me to.”
There was that non-verbal communication thing again. If Cat had had a tendency towards paranoia, she’d start to feel left out pretty soon.
Lois shook her head again. “No, really, I’ll be fine. You go see if Rebecca needs a lift home from the hospital. She’s supposed to be released this evening, isn’t she?”
Clark nodded. “Tonight or first thing in the morning. But you be careful out there.”
Lois nodded. “Don’t worry. I don’t take chances with airplanes and lightning.”
Cat watched Lois close down her computer in record time and scurry to the stairwell. Maybe I should take the stairs more often, thought Cat. Lois runs up and down them all the time and she seems to be in great shape.
*****
Ellen Lane gripped the hand rests on either side of her seat and closed her eyes. “I’m going to be sick,” she moaned.
“Just hold on, Ellen,” her husband said as he patted her hand. “We’re approaching the runway now and we’ll be down in ten minutes.”
“This plane is bouncing all over the sky, Sam! We should have gone around and waited for the storm to pass.” Ellen put a hand on her stomach and belched loudly. “I don’t know how much more of this I can take.”
From her window seat, Lucy sighed and said, “You won’t be sick if you decide not to be sick, Mother. Of course, it could be all those vodka and bourbon shots you had over Ohio and Pennsylvania making you nauseous.”
“You leave me alone about that, young lady! You know how high-strung I am! You know that sometimes I need help to relax!”
“If you were any more relaxed, Mother, they’d have to mop you up and carry you off the plane in a bucket.”
“Now see here, Lucy Lane! Just because you’re going to college in Metropolis doesn’t mean you can speak that way to me! Your pilot boyfriend is a bad influence on you!”
Lucy fixed her mother with a laser gaze. “Allen makes a good living, Mother. He’s honest and dependable and gainfully employed and he got us this flight at a steep discount. I’d think you’d be at least a little grateful.”
“He’s just trying to get in good with me! He’s just like all your other boyfriends, he just wants to get you in bed with him!”
Lucy sighed as drunken, unreasonable Ellen surged to the forefront. “Fine, Mom, he’s just after my body. Never mind that we’re talking about getting married next summer. Just pretend he’s a loser who’s dating another loser whose mother is a total loser.”
“What? Why you – you little – “
Sam patted her hand again. “Now, Ellen, let’s just calm down and wait until we land before we – “
“Before we what, Sam? Before we start fighting again?”
“I think Dad would prefer that we didn’t fight at all, Mom.”
“I’m sure he would! But he’s talking to the wrong person! I never – Yaaaah!”
The plane lurched to the left and tilted sharply, then dipped back to the right again. Lucy turned quickly to the window and saw what she thought were pieces of metal flying out of the engine on the right wing. One piece of metal seemed to pop off the side of the engine and puncture the rear of the wing. Bird strike, she thought, or maybe just debris kicked up by the storm, and a very expensive jet engine was suddenly scrap metal. What a way to go.
For a few moments, flames popped out of the back of the engine, then a plume of thick dark smoke billowed out. A flight steward pulled his way along the aisle and told everyone to tighten their seat belts and bend over while holding a pillow. Lucy’s mind flashed on a scene from the movie “Airplane!” when the stewardess told the passengers to assume crash position and everyone in the passenger compartment jumped into different weird contorted postures.
But this wasn’t funny. They were in real danger. Lucy knew, from dating Allen and from her own meager student pilot training, that the two most dangerous parts of any airplane flight were takeoff and landing, largely because the ground was too close for the pilot to recover from an error or compensate for a problem with the plane. Allen had taken her to one of the training films shown to pilot instructors concerning low-level crashes, and she never wanted to see anything so violent again in her entire life. It had frightened her so badly that she’d sworn off watching airplane disaster movies. She’d even considered never flying with Allen again because of them.
She almost stopped breathing when she realized that she was in a real-life crash about to happen.
Her mother wasn’t the only one who wasn’t happy with the way the aircraft was skidding through the air. Other passengers were calling out in fear or shouting questions at the flight crew as the plane’s nose dipped sharply and it banked further to the right. The starboard flaps are jammed partly extended and we’re going to spin in, thought Lucy, and I didn’t get a chance to apologize to Lois for hiding her teddy bear in the tree when she was eight and calling her a baby when she saw it and cried and –
The plane suddenly stabilized. Lucy looked out the window again and saw a flying person wearing what looked like a black jumpsuit under the wing where the damaged engine was now streaming a thinning plume of white smoke. The person – it looked like a woman – was signaling to the pilot with one hand. Apparently they were going to attempt a landing despite the damage.
The overhead speaker crackled to life. “Ladies and gentlemen, we have declared an in-flight emergency and are landing with the help of one of Metropolis’ super-heroes. Please remain in your seats until we come to a complete stop. We will be using the inflatable ramps to disembark from the aircraft. Please follow the instructions given to you by the flight crew. These instructions are for your safety and the safety of your fellow passengers. You must remain calm – “
The pilot, or whoever was talking over the intercom, faded from Lucy’s hearing. She was focused on the woman flying under the wing of the airplane. It had to be Ultra Woman! No one else could do what she was doing, except of course Superman, and this certainly wasn’t Superman. Now that she looked closer, she could even see Ultra Woman’s figure clearly. Her arms and shoulders weren’t huge by any means, but her excellent muscle definition showed through her suit. Her body tapered to a perfect waistline, and her hips were smooth and solid. Her calf muscles were picture perfect. Wonder if she uses a Stairmaster, thought Lucy.
Lucy was mesmerized by the sight of a woman doing something she’d long thought impossible for anyone other than Superman. She watched as Ultra Woman waved one arm and pointed down, then nodded in an exaggerated manner, probably signaling to the pilot again. Lucy gasped as Ultra Woman shifted position, then reached up and bent a piece of metal out of the way to release the wing flaps. We’re in the landing pattern, thought Lucy, and there go the landing gear, down and locked. There’s Ultra Woman shifting back out to the damaged engine, scissoring her legs as she hand-walked down the wing, her leg muscles bunching and relaxing in turn, the dimple on her left buttock –
Oh, no, thought Lucy. Ultra Woman has a dimple on her rear end just like Lois does. I wonder if she hurt herself like Lois did when –
No.
No way!
But –
They were the same build. They appeared to be about the same height, although estimating Ultra Woman’s height was difficult under these circumstances. But Lucy had stood under a Boeing 747 wing with Allen more than once, so she did have some experience with the size of the engines. They looked to be about the same height –
No! Her sister couldn’t be Ultra Woman! Impossible!
And then the woman flying under the plane lifted her face and appeared to scan along the passenger compartment, and when her eyes found Lucy’s, she stopped for a moment and almost seemed to relax. Then Ultra Woman’s gaze continued along the side of the plane and she nodded to herself.
Those were Lois’ eyes behind that mask.
Lucy turned in her seat and tried to look to the back of the plane, but she was too short to see over the seat back. As she twisted, her mother grabbed her arm in terror and blurted out, “We’re going to die I’m so sorry it’s all your father’s fault take care of my parakeets – “
“Ellen! Calm down! Ultra Woman is helping us land! We’re going to be fine!”
“Oh, yes, it’s just like you to get a woman to help you, isn’t it? Just wait till we get to the hotel! You’ll pay for this, oh yes you will, Doctor Samuel Lane!”
Lucy almost leaned over to say, Don’t worry, Mom, Lois is landing the plane, but at the last second she realized how stupid that sounded. There was no way Lois was flying under the wing and helping them land. It wasn’t possible.
Lucy looked out the window again and was stunned to recognize her sister’s profile under Ultra Woman’s mask as the heroine helped guide the plane to a soft touchdown and smooth landing. She peered closer and saw Lois’ exotic eyes – eyes of which she’d always been jealous – blink twice as they looked into the cockpit once again. Ultra Woman – Lois – even blew on the tires and got them spinning forward to reduce the shock to that side of the airframe.
As the plane slowed to a stop and the flight crew stood to assist the passengers, Lucy sat back and let out a long breath. Her sister was Ultra Woman! And if she hadn’t made the assumption and then looked for evidence, she never would have realized it.
She glanced out the window once more and saw the heroine staring at the engine as if checking for a fire. She floated down, spoke briefly to two of the emergency workers, then lifted up into the night sky and disappeared from view. Probably headed to the terminal to meet them, thought Lucy.
She wondered if Superman was available and if Lois would be willing to set her up with him. She’d never have to pay airfare again.
*****
Lois’ apartment door closed behind her parents as they left, still arguing about anything that came into Ellen’s inebriated head. The traffic leaving the airport was horrible and Lois had picked the wrong line at the parking lot payment booth and the airline was holding everyone’s luggage overnight for security reasons and Sam had forgotten to pick up Ellen’s overnight bag from the overhead bin and there was no way for them to get it back tonight and now Ellen would have to buy a toothbrush and toothpaste and hairbrush and a shower cap and no she wasn’t going to stay there that night and put Lois to any trouble because they had hotel reservations for the night unless Sam had messed them up too and Metropolis cabs always smelled horrible because of all the drunks getting sick in them and the stairs in Lois’ apartment building were too steep and the steps were too tall –
Lois leaned against the closed door and looked at her sister. Their eyes met and they sighed almost in unison. “How did you survive the flight with all that going on?” Lois asked.
Lucy shrugged and sat down on the couch. “It wasn’t all that bad until the engines started falling off the plane.”
Lois grunted. “I guess that was more fun than you thought you were going to have.”
“It was that. I’m so very glad that Ultra Woman was there tonight. She saved a lot of lives.”
“I’m glad she was there, too. I wouldn’t want to file a story about my little sister getting smushed like a bug in a plane crash.”
“So, you already sent in the story?”
“Yes. I called it in while you and Dad and Mom were being checked out by the airline’s doctor.”
Lucy took a long breath. She wanted to know. She needed to know. She didn’t want to find out. She hoped she was wrong. She hoped she was right.
Lois sat beside her and gently put an arm around her shoulder. “Hey, Punky, it’s okay. You’re safe now.”
Lucy nodded. “I know. Thank you.”
“For what? For telling you that you’re safe?”
“No.” For better or worse, Lucy decided to go for broke. “For propping up the starboard wing and landing the plane.”
Lois’ eyes flickered oddly. “What? For – I did what?”
Lucy turned and faced Lois directly. “You’re Ultra Woman, aren’t you?”
Lois said nothing, but her eyes nearly popped out of her head and her lower jaw all but fell away from her mouth. “It’s true, isn’t it?” insisted Lucy. “I saw your butt.”
Lois snorted and snapped her mouth shut. “What? You saw my butt? What in the world are you talking about?”
Lucy stood and stepped to the middle of the room. “When we were kids, I hid your teddy bear up in the tree in Mr. Wilson’s front yard across the street, remember? You climbed up to get it but you fell and hurt your leg. You have a permanent dimple in your left butt cheek from a root you fell on that dug a little chunk of meat out of the muscle and the doctor said that you’d be okay but that you’d have that dimple for the rest of your life.” Lucy tried to smile. “I saw that same dimple on Ultra Woman just a little while ago when she was flying under the wing of the plane.”
Lois stared at her. “I’m right, aren’t I?” insisted Lucy. “You are Ultra Woman.”
Lois waved her hands helplessly. “Lucy, I – “
“No, it’s okay, I won’t tell anyone, not ever. Not even Mom and Dad.” Lucy blew air past her lips. “Especially not Dad, and most very especially not Mom. They’d never understand.”
Lois slowly leaned back on the couch and put her hands in her lap. “Do you understand? Why I didn’t tell you before, I mean.”
Lucy found a chair and sat down. “Well – yes, I think so. We haven’t been all that close lately, and this is a humongous secret, and it’s important for you to keep it or you would’ve told everyone by now.”
Lois nodded. “That’s all true. Except that the main reason I didn’t tell you wasn’t because I don’t trust you with it – because I do – but because I wasn’t sure how to tell you.”
“Well, you don’t have to worry about that now. And unless you’ve been showing everybody your bare butt as yourself, which I seriously doubt you have been, I don’t think anyone else will be able to figure out who you are – I mean, who else you are. At least, not like I did.”
Lois nodded again and smiled ruefully. “He warned me not to get rid of the cape.”
“What? Who told you that?”
“Superman, of course. The cape would have covered – ”
“Superman!” Lucy leaped to her feet. “You know him? Duh, of course you know him! Ultra Woman works with Superman! Yikes! My sister knows Superman! Oh, Lois, wow, wow, wow – “
Lucy started bouncing in place and fanning herself with her hands. “Can I meet him? Please, Sis, can I meet him? I mean, he’s so cool and so – so super! And he’s hot! Oh, he’s so hot! Is he dating anyone? Oh, crap, are you dating him? Are you and he – do you – like up in the air and – ew! You don’t do him in the air, do you?”
Lois stood and planted her fists on her hips. “Lucy Lane! No, I’m not dating Superman! I’m not ‘doing’ him, either on the ground or in the air or anywhere else! And I’m certainly not joining the mile-high club with him! I can’t believe you – no, after knowing you for nineteen years I can believe it! Whatever happened to Allen?”
“Allen who?”
“Allen Peterson, your boyfriend! The pilot you wrote about in your last two letters! The guy you flew with from California to Texas and back again!”
“Oh, yeah, that Allen. He’s still my boyfriend, but he wouldn’t mind if I – if Superman and I – oh, nuts. Maybe he would mind after all.”
Lois held her sister’s gaze for a long moment, then snorted out a laugh. “Well, I guess you wouldn’t be Lucy Lane if your mind didn’t swerve into the gutter on a regular basis.”
Lucy ducked her gaze. “I’m sorry, Lois, really. But you have to admit that it’s an interesting thought.”
Lois’ eyebrow rose. “I’m not sure Superman would agree with you.” She took Lucy’s hands and tugged her back down to the couch. “Now, I’m sure you have some questions for me. I’ll answer anything I can.”
“Okay.” Lucy thought for a moment, then asked, “How did you get your powers? I mean, there’s nothing like that in our family.” Suddenly her jaw dropped. “Unless – oh, no, Lois, is Dad – I mean, did Mom – are we – are you really my – my half-sister?”
It was Lois’ turn to drop her jaw. “What? No! How could you – no, wait, I can see exactly how you could come up with that question. No, as far as I know, you and I are twisted branches of the same gnarled family tree.”
“Oh. Then – how did you get your powers?”
Lois sighed. “I don’t know. And I’m not dodging the question, either. I can’t tell you because I really don’t know. It was like – like Superman’s powers were copied to me somehow.”
“Oh.” Lucy nodded slowly. “Um. I don’t know what to ask you now.”
“Then why don’t you get some sleep? You may not feel it now, but you’re going to be exhausted tomorrow. Besides, I do still have to go to work in the morning.”
“But I’m not tired!”
“But I am.”
Lucy frowned. “How can Ultra Woman be tired?”
Lois shook her head and smiled. “Because I’m still human and I need my sleep. I’m going to let you sleep in tomorrow. Call me when you wake up, okay? We’ll have lunch, assuming you get up in time.”
“Oh, I’ll have to. I need to get used to getting up early for class.”
Lois stopped and stared. “Class? What class?”
“College.” Lois didn’t register any recognition. “My college classes?” Still no response. “My college classes that I’m going to be attending while living with you?”
Lois jumped to her feet and leaned over her sister. “You WHAT?”
Okay, thought Lucy, that got a response. She all but whispered, “I guess Mom didn’t tell you why we were coming?”
Lois moved back a step and put her hands against the sides of her head. “No, she didn’t, I thought it was just a family visit, but let me guess. You’re supposed to live with me while you go to school and Mom and Dad pay for it and give you an allowance and I’m just pleased as punch with the whole idea. That about it?”
“Well, yeah, except for the part about you being so happy to have me living with you.” Lois snorted and dropped her hands. “Hey, Sis, it wasn’t my idea! Mom insisted that I live with you. You’re supposed to protect me and keep me out of trouble.” Lucy shook her head. “I guess I’d better be good if I’m going to be reporting to Ultra Woman.”
“Lucy – no.” Lois crossed her arms and took a deep breath. “I don’t want to have this conversation right now. Let’s get some sleep and talk about this in the morning. I assume that Mom and Dad aren’t leaving first thing tomorrow?”
“I don’t think so. But then, I thought they’d already cleared this whole thing with you, too, so maybe I’m not in the loop after all.”
Lois bit her lower lip for a moment, then said, “We’ll all have lunch together tomorrow. And we’ll hammer this out with them then.”
“Okay, Sis.” Lucy sat back and released a jaw-cracking yawn. “Wow. I guess I am tired after all.”
“I’m not a bit surprised. You want to share the bedroom with me or would you rather use the fold-out couch? It’s not all that comfortable, but it’s more private.”
“I think I’ll take the couch if you don’t mind showing me where the linens are.”
Lois grinned. “No problem.”
Lucy stood and followed her sister to a closet. She hesitated for a moment, then said, “Lois? I’m sorry.”
“About what?”
Lucy took the pillows and blanket. “About all this.”
“You’re not a burden, Punky, if that’s what you’re thinking.”
“No. I’m sorry that Mom and Dad didn’t include you in their plans.”
Lois hesitated, then picked up a fitted sheet and two pillowcases. “It’s fine. I’m used to it by now.”
“You shouldn’t be. It isn’t right. If you don’t want me to stay with you, I’ll back you up at lunch tomorrow. I don’t mind living on campus. Might be fun, actually.”
Lois shrugged. “If you want to, that’s okay with me. But it’s also okay with me if you stay here.” She pulled the cushions off the couch and unfolded it into a bed. “As long as we establish some ground rules and stay with them.”
Lucy grinned. “No problem. Really. Hey, why don’t we use this to press for a bigger allowance for me? I’ll split the increase with you.”
Lois laughed. “That’s my little sister, always with an angle.”
“Okay then, we’ll leverage an allowance for you, too, just for putting up with me.”
They laughed together. “Lucy Lane, you are the most devious, least trustworthy, and by far the sneakiest little sister in the world. You’d make a wonderful reporter.”
