Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic FDK: After Nightfall: The Return of Superman (12/12)

So there it is.

Obvious?
Reasonable?
Plausable?
Ridiculous?
Other? (If you think it is awful, and feel inclined ot share with my why you feel that way, feel free to PM me. )

My thanks to everyone that stuck it out through the story and to IolantheAlias and Morgana for top-notch beta duty.

Comments here, please.

Bob

I was beginning to think that the big problem with Dr. Mendenhall's plan was the SM=CK angle. At some level it seems odd that Mendenhall did not try to turn Lois against Superman as well, but I guess in theory reprograming of thought is more effective if one limits the goals and messages presented.

I liked Dr. Klein's explanation of the changes being superficial and not permanent.

Dr. Klein's explanation of the various types of cells Superman had also seemed to work. I have to say that it was better than in canon where Superman's recovery was very much at the speed of plot.

I was kind of hoping Clark would recover his memories... I'm not sure if that is necessary though. Love that he's immune to Kryptonite now!

Bob,

Just what I have come to expect of your stories - an amazing twist and incredible irony.

Luthor was the means of his own downfall and ultimate demise as well.

What is to be next from that fertile mind?

Excellent story! I thought the explanation was plausible and had wondered how you were going to resolve it all in just one more part!

I, too, would have liked Clark to get his memories back... perhaps another sequel is in order? ...After Nightfall: Total Recall

Very much looking forward to your next piece of literary genius.



Cheers
Elizabeth

Well, I was certainly surprised by that development.

CLARK: Thanks, Luthor, for curing me of that pesky allergy to green rocks I had.

I think your explanation (or Dr. Klein's) to why this happened to Clark works in a literary sense, but I don't think cells really work in that way. But he's Kryptonian, so who knows?

I had expected the Suoerman thing to be the ace in the hole on Lois's end, but I had actually expected there to be a bit of a bit evil tease of Lois clinging to Superman (as her mindwashing was all able being the perfect woman for a powerful man.). I had actually expected the triangle of two to re-establish itself and have a mind block separating the Clark and Superman personalities until she attempted to figure out his "secret identity".

I hadn't seen how you could manage to wrap up the story in one final part, but you did it -- and did it quite well, might I add.

I do have one question, though: What ever happened to the other Martha? Given that she was part accomplice and part victim, did she go to jail? What sort of testimony did Lois give at her trial, if there was one? (All right, I know -- that was three questions. They all centered around one theme, though.)

Joy,
Lynn

I like the generally more-scientific approach to things throughout this story. The three cell types are interesting and plausible, at least within the context of there being this guy with superpowers in the first place.

A tidy ending to a very well written story. Not sure how the various people monitoring Superman never noticed that he fully healed, presumably breathing normally and generally healthy. Glad to see Luthor get his and Perry show how much he can help. Thanks for another wonderful read.

Superman's going to have quite a commute now, isn't he?

You came up with a very unique explanation for Clark's problems with kryptonite. I was initially left a bit skeptical, though. If a third of Clark's cells were killed over a matter of a few days, wouldn't that be catastrophic? But he heals super-fast, so I suppose he could compensate. I like the idea that Luthor set up the only precise situation that could kill off Clark's G-cells at exactly the right rate so that they wouldn't re-grow and the other cells could compensate quickly enough. If Luthor hadn't been so methodically sadistic, he would have succeeded in his plans. Rather poetic.

I also like what Dr. Klein had to say about Dr. Mendenhall's work - that people just don't work that way. It didn't make sense to me that they could completely reprogram Lois permanently in just a few weeks. It's totally believable, though, that Mendenhall had a much higher opinion of his theories than they deserved.

Thanks for entertaining us. I always love a good sequel.

John I have a vision of a discussion that Luthor and Mendenhall had where the doctor would stress that for the programming to be most effective, they should be precise in their targets. They think Superman has only just reappeared, so the connection to work on was her husband. At least, that is what I imagine happened.


Hi, EL. That was the point. But then, given what this guy did do in his episode, who can really say?

Bob

Delightful tale.

So what next? New Kryptonions?


Picture Lord Nor attacking Clark while he wears a ring with Green K

The reason I thought her part accomplice was that, IIRC, she had known going into this that the lady she would be serving was being held against her will. I would guess that in the eyes of the law, that would make her an accomplice. A reasonable person would have been expected to ask additional questions before agreeing to take on such a job. It seems to me akin to someone who buys a 50" television for $25 from the back of a truck. Perhaps "accomplice" is not the correct legal term; "accessory" maybe? (I am, obviously, no lawyer). In any event, it seems to me that she would have some measure of legal culpability, albeit much smaller than anyone else working for Lex.

In any event, this is a relatively minor detail. I want to reiterate that I enjoyed the story very much.

Joy,
Lynn

Framework4 That was EXACTLY the image I had in mind to go with Bernie's jewlery suggestion!


Lynn We clearly have a disconnect. My vision was that Martha was interviewed for a job that was presented as if she would be working for a wealthy recluse. I don't think "Am I going to be working for an evil, psychopathic villain?" is on my standard list of questions for a potential employer. The job probably seemed a little different, but I have to believe that during the interview process, anyone that was too concerned never got that 2nd interview. Then, once she was there, she was scared to do anything other than what she was told.

One more thing about Martha’s behavior, she was also getting customized subliminal messages. I had a whole section were Lex and Dr. M talked about the interacting message programs that Martha and Lois were getting in their bedrooms at night. Martha’s subliminals were to be a proper and deferential servant. That’s why she wore the uniform and why she refused to eat with Lois. I cut that part out because the Lex / Mendenhall scene was already too long and that explanation did little to move the overall story arc forward. I clearly need to consider adding that back in.

Sorry to get so long-winded, but poor Martha doesn't deserve to go to jail.

Bob

Hi Bob,
The line that made me consider Martha to be at least partially culpable was in part 9; specifically, [QUOTE“No, dear, I was hired to be here. But I've already been told that you aren't here by choice.[/QUOTE][/QUOTE]

It is true that you hadn't mentioned when she had been told; had it been only after she had been transported to the apartment? I had assumed that it was during the interview process, but you know what they say about assuming...

Joy,
Lynn

Lynn Now I understand. What she meant (and obviously should have said) was that after she arrived she was told that the lady she was to be caring for was not here by choice.

Now that I WILL fix.

Bob

Hmmm, that's probably the reason why I was suspicious of Martha. Ooops!

Still it would have been nice to know what happened to her. It is doubtful Lex and company would have allowed her to leave the underground complex alive.

All in all great story!!!! You had me biting my nails until the end!

Instead of adding it back, consider it being one of the points Lois and Clark discuss with Bernie. It would make sense that L&C would have some of the same concerns as Lynn. In discussing the News Story I can see Lois raising that same concerns maybe even the same quote.

Well done, Bob!

That ending was very unexpected, but you explained it very plausibly. Also, I'm glad that Perry officially knows, now.