All Tied Up in Nots
by lucyolsen
"Dr. Sanders! I assure you we know all our options. *This* one is the one for us! Why are you so adamant about not doing this?"
"I apologize, Ms. Lane, it's just that this procedure isn't performed very often with married couples anymore. For all the reasons I mentioned before, I truly believe there's a better option. If this is a phobia, or some type of nervousness, on the part of Mr. Kent, we have pamphlets and videos that you can take home wi-."
"Doctor, believe me," Clark cut him off. "If there was any way to prevent Lois from going through this...let's just say that I would if I could, but I can't, so I won't." Clark said, puzzling the doctor. "This is something Lois wants to do, and if there's one thing I can't prevent, it's anything that Lois wants to do."
This was terrible! Lois had never seen a doctor who argued so much, except for her father, when he had tried to force her into medicine. They were getting nowhere with this...this...man! Always convinced that his ways were the best, she was sure. What kind of doctor made such a fuss over which procedure he performed, anyway? At this rate, they'd never get out of there! Lois decided she'd have to try a different approach.
"Okay, Doctor, you've convinced me," she said.
"I have?" he asked. It was about time! By this time, he would have been able to convince anybody else to take a dive out the window! All he'd been asking the Kents to do was consider an alternative procedure!
"Yes. I am emphatically, one hundred percent, no qualms about it convinced that your idea is the better one. Unfortunately, we're still not doing it."
"You're not."
"No."
"May I ask why?"
"You may, but I doubt you'll get an answer you like. All I *will* say is that I am a very stubborn person, and nobody, not even my husband, has ever convinced me to do one thing after I've said I'm doing another."
"She's right, you know," Clark interjected. "Nobody ever has."
"Doctor, believe me; we understand all the issues. Yes, the procedure we're opting for has less chances of success; yes, it is more invasive; yes, it has a longer recovery time. But hear this: you can talk 'til you're blue in the face, but no matter how much you want to, no matter how much *I* want you to be *able* to, you will *not* give my husband a vasectomy!
"Now, I love my children, all of them, but I'm sick and tired of the fact that my husband's very *active* sperm has turned me into a baby factory. You will schedule me to get my tubes tied or we will find another doctor. Is that clear?"
the end
