Making even less sense. Forgetting stuff very quickly. Am now switching to comment-as-I-read mode, and cleaning up typos as fast as I can.
So, first off, dashes don't work for me, either. They sound good in theory, but in practice, they're just weird and distracting. At least, IMHO. Sorry to once again contribute to your FDK folder being about punctuation.
Love the Baby Bear bit. <g>
Was a bit confused by switching from a description of the inside (complete with "Hello? Anybody here?") to the need for a "key" to get in, but rereading, I see I missed the fact that he was looking in through a window. Probably just me being tired, but it may be something to consider in passing as you give it that archive polish.
I like the brooding cabin, and Lois's key.
Poor not-used-to-being-frozen Clark.
Poor not-used-to-being-grounded Clark.
Poor too-stupid-and/or-stubborn-to-have-packed-a-warm-coat Lois.
Poor too-silly-to-realize-alligators-don't-climb-trees-and-especially-not-in-the-frozen-woodland-and-also-really-really-don't-flutter Lois. You're funny, Lois, but, really, if you'd paid a bit more attention to the Discovery Channel, you'd know that all you need to do is hold its jaws shut.
Good sensitive Clark. <pat, pat>
lol, ninjas. Ninjas with guns. Good thing ninjas are patient. Not sure about ninjas with guns, though. Are they patient?
Silly Lois. Streetlights are for streets, not trees. (Treelights are for trees, but only expensive ones.)
lol about yuppie retreat.
Silly Lois. Alligators can't open doors. Only CGI velociraptors can do that.
Aww. Cozy little possible madhouse cabin in the middle of nowhere which is probably surrounded by machine gun toting bad guys, isn't it?
"nature's spectaculars" ... ? Indication of sleepy Lois? Indication of sleepy Paul? US/UK thing? Other?
Bad Lois. Sit. Stay. (Yeah, right.)
Lack of candles decidedly odd. Gas heat? No, would still be odd. Hmm. Well, glad Lois is happy about it, anyway. LOL about her own orginization. ... And her fridge.
<scowls at Clark> You are not a mother hen. You have not been hypnotized into thinking you're one. (At least, not this time.) Get out of the frozen poultry section, Clark.
Oh. Lois kind of likes it. That's okay, then, I guess. This time. Being properly gentlemanly and comforting and suchlike.
By the way, Clark, how are you feeling? You seem to be walking around okay, but is that just for Lois's benefit? I know you're feeling a bit better than she was, but last I saw, you weren't really in great shape. Lois, wake up and tell me how Clark's doing, will you?
Hmm. Clark's wondering, Lois is wondering. I'm wondering why everyone is wondering so much about a first aid kit.
Kudos to mysterious hopefully-not-psycho house owners for having a proper "we're in the middle of nowhere, we really should be ready..." first aid kit. Nice detail, too, and lol about Lois's reaction to it.
Malaria pills? Really. How very interesting. Unless Lois is using hyperbole on me. Gotta watch her. She knows all sorts of judo.
Ooo. Good careful Clark. Good boy.
lol, was just chiding that little voice in the back of my mind for having picked up on the phrase "throbbing in her partner's hands" and then Lois goes and does that. Bad Paul. Good Lois.
Hey, wait. Now Lois is thinking. Stop that, Lois! Kae, come here and tell Lois to stop thinking, will you? Where's a TTT when you need one?
Oh. There's that "didn't care at all" that you were talking about. Actually, here I am, 4am, thinking I really should be getting ready for bed now that it's far enough from dinner that I can take my nighttime meds. Now would be a good place to stop for a while. What's that, little voice? I shouldn't encourage her? The other readers will do what? Oh. Well, in any case, I'm glad to have the option of reading more, because I'm certainly enjoying reading this much. Really, there isn't that much more. I can keep going for a little while longer. Yeah...
lol, knew you weren't talking about CK=SM. Especially not with Clark bleeding and all. Would never have thought of glass slippers. Very fitting. (Er... if you'll pardon the term.) Glad Clark got it. That's cool.
"Down, boy"? What? Kae, I need you and that TTT again...
Ooo, good Lois. This is so sweet.
I'm really liking this scene. Nice to see them happy and quasi-fliting. With slightly more honesty than perhaps intended. Cool.
Poor confused Clark, though. Hmm. Glance tells me that in another pargraph or so, I'll find out just how confused Lois is. Nice.
Hey, wait a sec. Thinking about Lois... Clark's done bandaging her. That means it's her turn, right? That should be fun.
lol, bit of a fuax pas there, Clark. A bovine-sized one.
Ooo! Pulling her leg (so to speak)! Didn't see that coming any more than Lois! LOL, nice!
Wait a sec. Clark's talking about sports injuries, and suddenly we're back in his POV. Without the little devider thingy. What happened?
No, now we're back in Lois's head, which is where I thought we were.
lol about the sweater. And hey, good for you, Lois!
Shirtless Clark! That should make about 95% of the readers very happy.
Aww. Shirtless Clark is bleeding and distracting Lois. Stop that, shirtless Clark.
"And way, way too close to her partner's throat than she liked." Huh?
There we go. More of that good WAFFy stuff. Good for you, shirtless-but-bandaged Clark.
"Machinegun-toting" never seen "machine gun" as one word before.
Yes, shirtless-but-bandaged Clark, fire is good. Brings warmth. Much like shirts. Also sweaters. You might want to remember those, even if they would disappoint your fans.
"You need to get out of those wet clothes," LOL!!
Firewood. Good idea, shirtless-but-bandaged-and-now-holding-his-sweater Clark, but you may want to get dressed before you go back out. Maybe even borrow a coat. Just a thought.
So, okay. That only took... an extra half hour. Not too bad. I think I'm going to sleep now, though. Good night, Lab. Great part. Looking forward to seeing more. Good night, shirtless-but-bandaged Clark. Good night, bandaged-but-not-shirtless Lois. Good night, FoLCs.
Paul
