jimmy: here, lois, i got that paperwork you wanted.
lois: great! thanks, jimmy! oh, but i'll need to sign it... can i use your forehead?
jimmy: what? oh, sure, i guess...
jimmy thinking: it's worth it. little does she know that hidden in that paperwork is a statement that the signer will repaint the cheif's office any color he wants, even if it takes the whole weekend. once she's signed it, there's nothing else she can do. this'll be great...
lois thinking: this is fun. little does jimmy know that i'm signing his name on this paper...
----
lois: okay, you look a lot different than the last jimmy. that could be a problem, but luckily, i've got it taken care of. let me see... good, perry isn't looking. now, if you'll hold still, i'm going to tape this picture of the old jimmy to your head...
----
lois: okay, now close your eyes...
jimmy: okay.
lois: you're not closing your eyes.
jimmy: yes i am.
lois: no, you're squinting. i can tell.
jimmy: no i'm not.
lois: okay, i'm going to hold this in front of you, just to be sure.
jimmy: fine, whatever.
...
lois: okay, ready?
jimmy: yeah, sure.
lois: voila! the floating coffee cup! suspended in mid-air by nothing more than the power of my will! be amazed!
----
jimmy: hey, lois, i've got a riddle for you.
lois: oh?
jimmy: what's the difference between a baby and a norse god?
lois: what?
jimmy: the baby is in a diaper, but the norse god is in asgard!
lois: uh-huh. well, i've got one for you, jimmy.
jimmy: yeah?
lois: knock knock.
jimmy: who's there?
lois: big heavy clipboard.
jimmy: big heavy clipboard who?
<thwack>
jimmy: ow.
