I have not the time, energy or emotional fortitude at the moment to address some of the FDK in the last FDK thread
Carol, I apologize again. I never intended to make you feel that way. I hope you know by now that I don't feel the characters are irredeemable and that I don't want you to rewrite everything. I think I'll take a page from the way I deal with students in my writing classes and just ask you questions from here on out instead of making statements. The only thing is, you can't answer except by quoting from the story because what's in your head doesn't count; only what you've put on the page.
[Edited to explain: Carol, I'm not expecting you to answer me at all, or even stop your progress on your first draft. The questions below are just ones that trouble me as a reader that you can deal with when you start editing.]
In your author's note on Part 64, you said, "*I* took Clark's moment with Christopher as a turning point where he's starting to realize some things about himself and how he's been."
I don't understand why he changed. This is the last thing he thought before that scene:
I penciled in study times and it looked like I'd only have Christopher by myself for about three hours total this week and most of that was in half hour chunks.
Maybe I'd be lucky and he'd sleep through most of it.
Not the sort of attitude that starts taking responsibility. The next scene is Lois at the Planet, and then Clark talks to the nanny and thinks:
I sat on the bed and gazed at Christopher – currently sleeping contentedly in his bassinet. Would Tim be a father to the baby Lana was having? Would I be able to be a step-father to him or her if Lana took me back once all this was over? There was no doubt in my mind that I could do that.
So what was my problem?
Then he picks up Christopher and has that monologue. I don't get it. Why has he suddenly decided to accept responsibility for this baby? What made the pain of staying the same suddenly get worse than the pain of changing?
Lovely word picture from Lois about Clark with Chris.
I liked Star, and I was glad Sam inadvertently forced L&C to go to the game together--until I read this:
No one watching or listening would hear the icy undertones unless they knew both of us really well.
I assume that's Lois's PPD talking, but why is Clark angry enough to be speaking with icy undertones?
That marriage revelation at lunch was awkward but the revelation from Jimmy overshadowed it. That will certainly change Jimmy and Lois's relationship. Maybe they'll each take the place of the other's lost sibling.
