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#25036 10/29/05 05:45 AM
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Oh, this was great! Very sparse writing style, but you get their emotions across very plainly. And I love the backwards revelation:

Quote
“And how do you know that? Are you Superman and you x-rayed in?”

-----

Several moments pass before I can form a coherent thought again.

She knows. There is no way she said that coincidentally.

I realize my jaw has dropped open. I close it, swallow hard and speak. “Actually, I only used my super-hearing. Can I come in now?”
And she still doesn't let him goofy At least until he shocks her -- love that he's convinced it was an incredibly stupid thing to say, but it's the one thing that got her to open up.

I love that "eventually" wink Great ending.

Great job, Anna!

PJ

#25037 10/29/05 06:23 AM
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Oh, Anna...I simply loved it! party


I'm a firm believer in the fact that God doesn't put any more on us than we can bear. He does however make us come to Jesus every so often.
#25038 10/29/05 07:25 AM
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Very, very nicely done! I like the writing style a lot and just love the backwards revelation.

Great job!

Irene


I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once.
#25039 10/29/05 07:25 AM
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Beautiful and funny. Yes, Lois *should* torture Clark! But she didn't hold out long enough... ah, well. laugh

Wonderful sequel!


"You need me. You wouldn't be much of a hero without a villain. And you do love being the hero, don't you. The cheering children, the swooning women, you love it so much, it's made you my most reliable accomplice." -- Lex Luthor to Superman, Question Authority, Justice League Unlimited
#25040 10/29/05 07:37 AM
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Good sequel!! smile

Jose thumbsup


"Practice up your shielding spells...and remember to duck if you see green light coming your way."

Harry Potter to Wizengamot in OotP trial

A Bad Week in the Wizengamot
#25041 10/29/05 09:40 AM
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This was incredibly cute. I like the first person style narratives from both perspectives. Usually I prefer the third person, but this just couldn't have worked as well if you had done it that way, so good job! Nice and waffy smile1


Spike: "There's a hole in the world...feels like we ought to have known."
-Angel
#25042 10/29/05 10:34 AM
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Oooh, Anna!

You posted! laugh

I loved BRing this story - it was fantastic. smile

You already know what I think about this story, so I'll just say... it's hilarious and wonderful! <g>

Dave (who thinks Anna needs to forget about school and spend more time writing <g>)


'I just kind of died for you;
You just kind of stared at me'
- Aurora, Foo Fighters
#25043 10/29/05 12:42 PM
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Absolutely fantastic, Anna! I loved it! smile

Everyone else has mentioned the reverse revelation, which I loved, and Pam mentioned the 'eventually'. Wonderful stuff! laugh But I almost laughed out loud at this:

Quote
I hate him. I despise him. I want him covered with tar and feathers and hung upside down from a tree to dry.
rotflol

You have a great handle on the first-person present tense style here. It's sparsely written, yet the emotions and reactions flow through very clearly. And there's nothing here to show that English isn't your first language. Your writing is just getting better and better, Anna.

This and the prequel are going straight on my Kerth list. And I want more from you! wildguy


Wendy smile


Just a fly-by! *waves*
#25044 10/29/05 02:16 PM
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Great job! I also loved the reverse revelation. Very cute and sweet story. Laura


Clark: “If we can be born in an instant, and die in an instant, why can’t we fall in love in an instant?”

Caroline's "Stardust"
#25045 10/29/05 03:46 PM
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Hi,

Love it! clap


Maria D. Ferdez.
---
Don't like Luthor, unfinished, untitled and crossover story, and people that promises and don't deliver. I'm getting choosy with age.
MAF
#25046 10/29/05 04:23 PM
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Anna,

That was GREAT!!!! I loved it! I love this spin on the revelation laugh laugh laugh


~NICOLE

#25047 10/29/05 06:18 PM
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thumbsup thumbsup thumbsup

thumbsup Absolutely superb!!! thumbsup

thumbsup thumbsup thumbsup


If she had to move heaven and Earth, perhaps come back to haunt Perry and explain the story after they'd killed her, she would do it.

Waking a Miracle by Aria
#25048 10/29/05 08:24 PM
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Anna

This is wonderful. smile1 I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Tricia cool

#25049 10/30/05 01:55 PM
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Short as it is, I loved it!! thumbsup

#25050 10/31/05 10:55 AM
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Thank you all so much!! As I mentioned earlier, I was quite unsure about this story, so I'm very happy to see it being received so enthusiastically smile

See ya,
AnnaBtG. (who, ignoring Dave's advice, is off to study History for tomorrow's test...)


What we've got here is failure to communicate...
#25051 11/06/05 09:49 PM
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Well, now that you've submitted this one to the Archive, Anna, I couldn't resist reading it after catching the first few lines while checking over the file.

Absolutely adorable! Loved it to bits. I'm not usually a big fan of first person narrative, but this worked very well and I think using anything else wouldn't have been half as effective. Terribly cute.

And this:

Quote
“Who loves me?” I manage. “Clark, or Superman?”

“*I* love you,” he simply says.
made me go all snuffly. thumbsup

LabRat smile



Athos: If you'd told us what you were doing, we might have been able to plan this properly.
Aramis: Yes, sorry.
Athos: No, no, by all means, let's keep things suicidal.


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Hi Anna,

I just finished reading both stories in this series. What fun! I can understand why these are your favourite stories that you wrote.

One phrase especially had my laughing aloud: oblong tea. it was a minor part of the stories, but it really tickled my fancy.

Joy,
Lynn

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I’m going to comment here since Lynn already bumped up the thread! laugh

(And for anyone who’s wondering, Anna mentioned this fic and its first story as her favorites she’s written in this thread about the favorite fics you’ve written. :))


Hah! I love Lois’ little revelation at the end of the first! And in the second… OMG… the “Actually, I only used my super-hearing.” line is SO amazingly perfect…the way he just simply answers instead of trying to hedge more and then wonders if he can come in now. Gah! I love it!

Sara smile


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Thank you for bumping this thread and leaving feedback! What a pleasant surprise! smile1

Lynn - yes!! Glad you liked this one! I'm ridiculously proud of it. grin

Sara - the revelation at the end of the first one really made the whole thing!

Glad you girls enjoyed it! smile

See ya,
AnnaBtG.


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Hi Anna,

Aaaand we can continue with Lois’s reaction smile1
Quote
Speechless, I watch him heading to the elevators…
…walking to the left of them…
…and taking the staircase leading to the roof.
He's dead meat.
So, does she have access to Kryptonite?
CLARK: shock help

Quote
A woman who left the oven turned on after she was done cooking. She vaguely reminded me of Lois.
laugh he should not tell Lois that.

Quote
What is she doing, breaking her pencils?
So she has more to pepper him with.

Quote
I hate him. I despise him
Oh, the old “he loves me / he loves me not” game.

Quote
The incompetent, lazy jerks! Can't a woman even berate her partner without everyone watching?
laugh

Quote
I look down. I see a pile of… well, pencil remains. I wish it had been a Clark Kent doll.
She could buy some Ken dolls. Point out their anatomical correctness. When Clark protests, she could raise an eyebrow and take out a pair of scissors to cut some paper.

Quote
I have much better things to do than occupy my mind with his pathetic lies.
How could he keep that from me?
/cocks eyebrow/
LOIS: What?

Quote
"I. Am. Perfectly. Okay!" I think that the way I emphasize my words does not suggest that I'm okay, but I'd rather die than admit that to that hypocrite.
clap

Quote
Lois Lane asked me a question, and I left it unanswered.
Yes, very dangerous.

Quote
I take a deep breath and knock on the door. Then wait.
***
That peephole is a very useful invention after all.
I lean with my back on the door, careful not to make any noises.
lol

Quote
"Lois, open the door, I know you're in there."
"And how do you know that? Are you Superman and you x-rayed in?"
CLARK: No, you answered the question so you must be in.
LOIS: mad

Quote
Actually, I only used my super-hearing. Can I come in now?"
laugh

Quote
"Lois, please, let me explain!"
"You are free to explain."
"To your door?"
"Then break in."
"I don't want to do that, Lois, please."
This guy is beginning to get boring.
"I beg you, let me come in. I know I should've told you."
He could try the window as Superman. Of course, once the Digger gets a photo of Superman pining away at Lois Lane’s window, things might take a turn for the worse.

Quote
"Lois, I beg you, just let me come in and explain and I'll never bother you again."
You are almost there.
"Lois, please, I love you."
Well, this certainly goes close to her being able to file a restraining order.

Quote
revealing a beautiful Lois Lane in a state of shock.
"What did you just say?"
laugh

Quote
And right now, as I look at this man, whoever he is, I know he is the one I love.
Although he has been a lunkhead.
He’ll do more stupid things. Well…more and stupider things.

Quote
"You have no excuse for not telling me earlier," I say quietly.
He's giving me the most beautiful smile as he reaches for my hand. "Will you forgive me?"
I smile back. "Of course I will."
He squeezes my hand and gives me another loving look. I can't help but play one last teasing on him.
"…Eventually."
Oh that was the most adorable tale! And will she make it contingent on his bringing her chocolate from distant places?
wave Michael


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