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Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28
Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28 |
Save A Slice of Pie For Me (15/15)Can I have some pie too?  Eeep! Thanks all for reading along!! Sorry if it seemed like forever that Jon had to wait for his dad! The whole story was only five days, really! Let me know what you think! -Bek
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Joined: Jan 2019
Posts: 1,011 Likes: 21
Top Banana
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Top Banana
Joined: Jan 2019
Posts: 1,011 Likes: 21 |
Felt like 5 years.
So glad he arrived and is well. I gather the sun healed him right up?
Anyway, yay! Now let them have pie.
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Joined: Apr 2023
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Blogger
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Blogger
Joined: Apr 2023
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Wow. Just...wow. This was such an amazing story (and thank you for posting the last three parts together, I think I would have gone mad). Am I the only one hoping for a sequel at some point? I'd love to see some Clark/Jon bonding once the joyful reunion has calmed down a bit. Plus, Clark has to help him with his powers! And what happened on New Krypton to keep him away so long? So many questions Thank you for this!! Now to shut off my whirring brain...
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Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28
Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28 |
Felt like 5 years.
So glad he arrived and is well. I gather the sun healed him right up?
Anyway, yay! Now let them have pie. Yes! It was back in chapter 13 that I tried to show that a bit... He hadn’t slept at all. He’d lain awake all night long, listening for his dad. Sometimes there’d been snippets of thoughts or feelings, but mostly…just a quiet. Not the empty quiet, though. Not that terrible, dark, empty silence. Something different, like a gentle presence surrounding him, accompanying him.
And an anticipation. Like how he felt too.
Toward morning, as he could see light begin to filter in through the curtains in his bedroom, the presence began to grow. And finally, by the time his mom knocked on his door to wake him up at seven, he felt a strange energy that he hadn’t felt before, and the words started to become much stronger, more clear, and without the heavy exhaustion that had always shrouded them before.
<<I can see the Sun, kiddo. And it’s so wonderful…because that means I’m almost home.>> Thanks for reading! -Bek
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Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28
Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28 |
Wow. Just...wow.
This was such an amazing story (and thank you for posting the last three parts together, I think I would have gone mad). Thank you so much!!  Am I the only one hoping for a sequel at some point? I'd love to see some Clark/Jon bonding once the joyful reunion has calmed down a bit. Plus, Clark has to help him with his powers! And what happened on New Krypton to keep him away so long? So many questions Thank you for this!! Now to shut off my whirring brain... There is certainly room to explore! They certainly have a lot of time to make up for  Thank you for reading. I'm really glad you enjoyed it!! -Bek 
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,147 Likes: 3 |
Excellent tale, and well-told to boot. I enjoyed Jon's journey from surprise ("I can hear people thinking! Hear them thinking? Yikes!") to agony of waiting for his father blended in with his fear that he's going a little nuts. The reunion scene was outstanding, and staying in Jon's POV with his actions and reactions in the forefront was excellent.
You do indeed have more to write in this universe. You need to answer some questions, explore Raegan and her family situation, and now Clark has to teach Jon how not to listen to his father and mother behind closed doors. I know the assumption is that it will be a fiercely passionate reunion, but there are several things they must deal with first.
Like - how long has Jon been hearing thoughts (great insight to have Martha understand first), why was Clark gone so long, what was the outcome of his time on New Krypton, does he have another family back there, are there any lingering obligations for him on New Krypton, just how much bitterness does Lois have saved up over his years-long absence, how long will it take each of the family members to adjust to the new reality of Clark being home, how much impact has Clark's experience had on him (both positive and negative), are his powers back (you hinted that they are or will be), will he take up the Cape again, what will he do for a living now, how much guilt will Clark carry for his long absence and his neglect of his parents and his son, just how bad is Jonathan's heart - the loose ends are almost limitless and rich with both dramatic and romantic potential.
Were I a gambling man, I'd bet - with a high degree of confidence - that you can handle all those questions and more with skill and deftness. I look forward to your next offering.
Life isn't a support system for writing. It's the other way around.
- Stephen King, from On Writing
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Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28
Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28 |
Excellent tale, and well-told to boot. I enjoyed Jon's journey from surprise ("I can hear people thinking! Hear them thinking? Yikes!") to agony of waiting for his father blended in with his fear that he's going a little nuts. The reunion scene was outstanding, and staying in Jon's POV with his actions and reactions in the forefront was excellent. Gosh, thank you so much! It was hard at the end because there are so many questions about Clark's journey -- why was he gone so long, etc., etc., as you outlined below. But those questions were not for answering here in this story. You do indeed have more to write in this universe. You need to answer some questions, explore Raegan and her family situation, and now Clark has to teach Jon how not to listen to his father and mother behind closed doors. I know the assumption is that it will be a fiercely passionate reunion, but there are several things they must deal with first.
Like - how long has Jon been hearing thoughts (great insight to have Martha understand first), why was Clark gone so long, what was the outcome of his time on New Krypton, does he have another family back there, are there any lingering obligations for him on New Krypton, just how much bitterness does Lois have saved up over his years-long absence, how long will it take each of the family members to adjust to the new reality of Clark being home, how much impact has Clark's experience had on him (both positive and negative), are his powers back (you hinted that they are or will be), will he take up the Cape again, what will he do for a living now, how much guilt will Clark carry for his long absence and his neglect of his parents and his son, just how bad is Jonathan's heart - the loose ends are almost limitless and rich with both dramatic and romantic potential. Indeed, Jon is going to have to learn a lot about not eavesdropping very quickly  I love all of these things you've outlined here, and I agree these are all unanswered questions that can be explored further and as Jon learns to control this ability of his (and other emerging abilities, which will surely show themselves soon) and builds his relationship with his father. The scene with Raegan was inspired by this panel from All-Star Superman: ![[Linked Image]](https://i.postimg.cc/GpYSc4YT/Regan.jpg) I'd love to explore more how Jon can use his ability to help those around him (but in a way that does not invade their privacy). Were I a gambling man, I'd bet - with a high degree of confidence - that you can handle all those questions and more with skill and deftness. I look forward to your next offering. Thank you again, truly! It was great to wake up this morning after what's been a rough week to such great FDK! And thanks for reading!! -Bek
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,831 Likes: 42
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 3,831 Likes: 42 |
Congratulations on an excellent story! It tugged at my heartstrings and made me think! A much, much better outcome than the well-written, but total tearjerker that was Becky Bain's story. Yes, there are many questions which must be explored/answered in another story. My goodness, who is this girl Jon has befriended, which adds yet another layer to this story. Oh, so looking forward to reading it. Ciao! 
Last edited by Morgana; 06/01/23 02:56 PM.
Morgana
A writer's job is to think of new plots and create characters who stay with you long after the final page has been read. If that mission is accomplished than we have done what we set out to do, which is to entertain and hopefully educate.
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 777
Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 777 |
A beautiful tale beautifully and wonderfully told.
"I'm red-eyed, tired and drunk" Teri Hatcher
"Fun will now commence" 7of9
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Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28
Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28 |
Congratulations on an excellent story! It tugged at my heartstrings and made me think! A much, much better outcome than the well-written, but total tearjerker that was Becky Bain's story. Yes, there are many questions which must be explored/answered in another story. My goodness, who is this girl Jon has befriended, which adds yet another layer to this story. Oh, so looking forward to reading it. Ciao! Thank you!! There really are a lot of questions. I guess I might need to see if my muse is up for writing a sequel. /Looks at her other WIPs.../  Ahhh, if only there were more hours in the day!! Thank you for reading!! A beautiful tale beautifully and wonderfully told. Thank you so much!! -Bek
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,666 Likes: 58
Pulitzer
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Pulitzer
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,666 Likes: 58 |
Wow, that was one intense journey. So many doubts for poor Jon. I agree with the others, this one deserves a sequel. We need to see more of Clark's and Jon's reunion than them just having pie.
Such a great story. Thank you so much for sharing.
It's never too dark to be cool. 
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Joined: Sep 2013
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Hack from Nowheresville
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Hack from Nowheresville
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 107 Likes: 2 |
What a wonderful story, SuperBek! Had me sitting on the edge of my seat at the end! Like most everyone else, would love to see a sequel to it soon! Please! 
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Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28
Features Writer
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OP
Features Writer
Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28 |
Wow, that was one intense journey. So many doubts for poor Jon. I agree with the others, this one deserves a sequel. We need to see more of Clark's and Jon's reunion than them just having pie.
Such a great story. Thank you so much for sharing. What a wonderful story, SuperBek! Had me sitting on the edge of my seat at the end! Like most everyone else, would love to see a sequel to it soon! Please! Thank you both! I've been thinking about how challenging it would be to show more of this story, still staying in Jon's POV while also showing enough of L&C's reunion to answer all of everyone's questions. Maybe I'll tackle it! Thank you again for reading! I love this story, and I'm glad it was so well received! -Bek
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Joined: Jul 2020
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Beat Reporter
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Beat Reporter
Joined: Jul 2020
Posts: 401 Likes: 41 |
Thanks for a wonderful, beautiful story, SuperBek! I love it! Clark and Jon touched my heart. I’m very happy that Jon wasn’t imagining talking with his dad. Clark’s arrival and Jon’s reaction was touching.
Like so many others, I hope you write a sequel. I would love to know what happens next. Clark was gone for a long time. He has a lot of reconnecting and rebuilding to do. You could always write the sequel from Clark’s POV.
Thanks for sharing this touching take!
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Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28
Features Writer
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Features Writer
Joined: Oct 2022
Posts: 904 Likes: 28 |
Thanks for a wonderful, beautiful story, SuperBek! I love it! Clark and Jon touched my heart. I’m very happy that Jon wasn’t imagining talking with his dad. Clark’s arrival and Jon’s reaction was touching. Oh boy, I might have been kicked out of the fandom if I'd done that to poor Jon!  Making him wait a few days was HARD ENOUGH! Like so many others, I hope you write a sequel. I would love to know what happens next. Clark was gone for a long time. He has a lot of reconnecting and rebuilding to do. You could always write the sequel from Clark’s POV.
Thanks for sharing this touching take! I think I'd like the challenge of writing it from Jon's perspective, but that does limit what we'd get to see from L&C and from Clark in particular...so maybe it would be better from Clark's POV... Ahh, I'll have to think on it! We'll see what my muse wants to do! Thank you for reading! -Bek
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