Wait a moment, it's not Friday. So why am I posting a MagiKal fic? We're moving and thus are without internet for the next three weeks. MagiKal won't make an appearance this Friday, so I decided to post this early. I plan on posting the next part on Monday perhaps and then I'll slip back into the routine of posting on Fridays. Behind The Trapdoor Houdini's agitated barks made Lois pick up her pace on her way upstairs. She was breathless by the time she reached the right floor. The Irish Setter stood on his hind legs, one paw scratching at her door, while he tried to push it open. Of course it wouldn't budge.
*Please be all right, please be all right,* Lois prayed.
Until she'd seen Houdini's reaction, Lois had hoped she wouldn't find Clark at her apartment. But obviously he wasn't just having a giant hiccup somewhere on the other side of the world.
From her pocket she pulled the lock picking equipment she kept in her car. Her hands were shaking as she knelt before her door, hoping she'd manage to pry it open. She couldn't afford to drive back to the Daily Planet and get her spare keys.
Moments dragged on for what seemed like hours as she tried to get the lock to cooperate. Houdini nudged her with his snout, urging her to hurry. He didn't make her task any easier. Lois muttered curses and gently pushed him aside. Tears filled her eyes. Why, oh, why had she brought the crystals back to Metropolis? Why hadn't she told Clark about them?
Well, she'd never expected him to go into her apartment, least of all on his own. But it seemed like he always did the most unexpected and sometimes stupid things when he was being kind. Which was all the time.
Finally, the lock clicked and she was able to turn it. As she opened the door, Houdini rushed past her. He slipped on the ground as he rounded the corner and hastened toward her kitchen. Lois ran after him.
"Clark, Clark!" she shouted.
"Over here," came the muffled reply.
He scrambled to his feet and sat down on the edge of her bed. His steps seemed a bit wobbly, but that could also be Houdini's fault. The dog was giving his master a thorough examination, sniffing at every spot of his body.
"I'm fine, Houdini." Clark soothed him. "You're smelling the croissants. I'm afraid I crunched them when I fell."
He ruffled Houdini's fur and buried his face in it. A strong surge of relief washed over Lois as she realized that he was indeed okay - not writhing in pain like she'd initially believed. But that he'd managed to get into her bedroom meant that he must have fought his way through the living room before. She remembered very well what these crystals had done to him the last time.
It was her fault that he'd had to endure it again. She didn't know how to face him. Not only had she gone behind his back, he'd been hurt because he'd wanted to get her clothes after she'd been out of her mind. As if her performance last night hadn't been hard enough on him already.
"Clark." The lump in her throat was suffocating.
As his gaze met hers, her gut clenched with guilt. Not because he frowned at her, which he would have had every right to do. His sheepish smile was her undoing. The tears that she'd managed to keep at bay until now spilled freely.
"You could have warned me," he said softly.
"I didn't think you'd ever be coming here." She cringed at her words. Was a simple apology so hard?
He chuckled and ran his hand through his hair. "Me neither. Guess, I should have asked before entering your apartment."
Lois flopped down beside him and he laid his hand on her shoulder, giving her a gentle squeeze. It felt good, but it also made the situation more awkward.
“I don’t know what to say,” she whispered.
A sob escaped her and she buried her face in her hands.
He rubbed her back. “Why did you take the crystals with you?”
She leaned into his soothing touch, finding strength in his presence, enough to meet his eyes. There was no anger in his gaze.
Lois took a steadying breath. “I was hoping that I’d find someone who could examine them, who might be able to tell me what they’re doing to you.” She bit her lip. “I should have told you about it and asked your permission, but I was afraid that you’d say no after what happened in Smallville. ”
Clark’s expression turned rueful. “You’re right, I would have.”
“I’m sorry.” She swallowed hard. “I’m so incredibly sorry you were hurt again.”
“Don’t be.” He leaned his forehead against hers. “I won’t deny that I’d rather not have to face that green stuff again, but for what it’s worth, I learned something from the experience.”
“That it’s dangerous to be around me?”
He laughed. “That too. No, what I meant is that the red crystal seems to affect me differently every time I encounter it. Looking back, I believe the first time I was apathetic to the point of not even realizing how painful the green crystal was. I wasn’t trying to escape and just let myself drift to unconsciousness. The second time I… “ He blushed furiously. “Well, you know what I was like the second time.”
Lois sat straight. She’d expected a lot, but not his calm and collected reaction. The knot in her gut loosened and suddenly, she felt a strange rush of excitement.
She reached for Clark’s hand. “And today?”
He looked down at his hands, studying them for a moment as if he was uncomfortable with what he was going to say next. Then he dropped them into his lap and looked at her.
“Today I fell into a deep hole of despair, deeper than anything I’ve ever experienced before.” He chewed on his bottom lip. “And let me tell you, I was pretty down when I realized that the hiccups were going to stay and that I would have to live my life outside society. But today, I was ready to let the green crystal end my life.”
His words seemed to reverberate through the room. The silence that followed was deafening. Clark looked at her, his mouth opening and closing as if he was searching for the right words to soften the blow. And as he stared at her, utterly forlorn and helpless, she understood beyond any shadow of a doubt that he’d meant what he'd said. He’d really been ready to die.
She drew a sharp breath and clapped her hand to her mouth. Her heart pounded in her chest that suddenly was so tight she didn’t know how to take another breath.
“Oh, Clark, no, please, no!”
“Hey.” He reached out and brushed a strand of hair back behind her ear. His touch was once again unrestrained and tender. “I’m still here. Because of you. Knowing that you love me helped me push those dark thoughts aside. Whatever this red crystal does to me, I can fight it.”
He seemed giddy all of a sudden, an infectious smile spreading across his lips. It was the last thing she’d expected to see after finding him on the floor of her apartment after another exposure to the horrible crystals. Though she didn’t quite know why, Lois couldn’t help but smile too.
Clark pulled her into an embrace. “Don’t you understand? Whatever happened to me in that hole, what if it’s also a result of the red crystal? That means I can fight that too. And I believe I already started fighting it. Remember the hiccup at the trailer that sort of stopped before it really started? Perhaps accepting my hiccups as a part of my life is the key! They've been less intense recently whenever you were near, because I actually tried to give this a chance. Maybe I… maybe I can make this work.”
Lois sank against him and relaxed into his hug. She felt Houdini lick her hands and stroked the dog. Something strange had happened here today, and perhaps it was even for the best. If Clark believed he could integrate the hiccups into his life, surely that was fine.
But a nagging voice in the back of her mind insisted that there had to be another solution, one that would truly set him free.
