TOCChapter 7:Present “Lois, if you have any faith in me left, then please come find me where I sent you on that wild goose chase for a Godzilla doll I had dressed up as Superman. I’m in desperate need of your help."
The plea in his pained gaze cut her right to the core. It penetrated all the layers of anger and righteous indignation Lois had wrapped around herself ever since Clark had started to kiss her, since she'd jerked her knee right into his groin and he’d collapsed in front of her.
She wanted to clap her hands onto her ears and hum a melody, so she wouldn’t hear him. He wouldn’t get to her, she wouldn’t let him feed her any more lies. She didn’t want to listen to him, not when he told her that he wasn't himself. Still, he couldn’t be honest with her. Instead, he was claiming that someone else - Luthor - had taken over. How gullible did he think she was?
It was easy to put all the blame on the dead guy. He couldn't complain anyway.
Lois was furious about Clark's lack of respect for her that showed not only in his actions but also in his refusal to take responsibility. She was mad at herself for letting him get close enough to hurt her.
Jekyll and Hyde? His most recent excuse was so outrageous, she would have laughed. But there really wasn't anything funny about it.
The man she'd fancied herself in love with wasn't at all who she'd thought he was. And he couldn't even be honest about it.
That realization cut her so deeply, it took her breath away. He was the first man in a long time she’d really let within arm’s reach. She’d trusted him more than anyone else in her entire life, with maybe the exception of Superman. And he’d betrayed that trust the first chance he’d gotten, worse than anyone else.
Clark let out a low moan, still lying on the floor before her. His eyes turned glassy and his face was scrunched in pain, as if he was fighting a bad case of migraine. The headphones, it seemed, were actually affecting him.
And despite herself, Lois felt her heart go out to him.
*No,* she chastised herself. *You’re not going to pity the jerk.*
Lois didn’t even know why she’d done any of the things he’d asked of her. Binding his hands with his tie? Well, tying his hands behind his back had at least given her some sort of perverse pleasure. But why had she complied with the headphones? Lois didn’t fully understand herself. It seemed that on some strange, primal level, Clark still had some influence on her.
But there was no way she was going to follow his last order. He wouldn’t chase her out of her own apartment! Lois set her jaw tightly and clenched her hands into tight fists.
She shouldn’t just be standing here.
She should have called the police right after she’d tied him up.
Her gaze drifted over his still form. His forehead was resting against the floor, his eyes tightly shut. Clark’s arms were still bound behind his back, at an angle that couldn’t possibly be comfortable. But he wasn’t fighting against his restraints, wasn’t even trying to adjust the angle.
And once more, Lois’ stomach clenched in sympathy, quite against her will. She felt a flutter of uneasiness in her belly, telling her that something about this wasn’t right. That Clark might be telling the truth. But Lois firmly pushed that feeling to the back of her mind.
She gritted her teeth. There it was again, the sympathy he simply didn't deserve. No, she wouldn’t fall for whatever trap he’d come up with now.
But that wasn’t so easy. She'd tried her best to steel herself as she'd watched her best friend writhing on the floor in obvious pain, which she had inflicted on him. It still affected her, even though she'd told herself that he'd deserved it, that she'd asked him to stop more than once.
Lois stared at him, frozen in place, as another anguished cry escaped his lips. It was followed by a low growl that sent a shiver down her spine. The sound made her stumble back a few steps. She felt the doorknob press into her back and her hand reached for it.
Now Clark stared at her, his eyes narrow with rage. “You b***ch! How dare you-”
He cried out like a hurt animal and a string of curses left Clark’s mouth that Lois had never heard from him before.
That got her into motion. Her heart leapt and started to race inside her chest. Her breath caught as she spotted her purse still slung across the love seat. She darted toward it, grabbed the strap, and then hastily retreated. She turned the doorknob and left her apartment as fast as she could.
Nearly tumbling down the stairs, Lois hurried to make it out of the building. The street was dark and deserted. As she hastened toward her car, she twisted her heel and almost lost her footing. She managed to catch herself before she would have taken a nosedive. With one hand she fumbled for her key, but her hands grabbed the same useless items over and over again. A lipstick, tissues, a small mirror, her purse… For agonizing moments, Lois thought that she’d left it in her apartment.
When her fingers finally closed around the keyring, Lois felt like fainting with relief. She opened the door and slipped behind the wheel. Quickly fastening her seatbelt, Lois slipped the key into the ignition and turned. The motor roared to life and Lois checked her rearview mirror. When she found neither oncoming cars nor an outraged Clark, she filed out of the parking lot and pressed the accelerator down. Her car shot forward in awkward spurts, testament to her frayed nerves.
She threw another glance into the rear-view mirror, half expecting to now see Clark barreling onto the street like a 400-pound gorilla. But there was no sign he was following her. As Lois turned her gaze back onto the street, she became aware of her pulse pounding in her throat. Her fingers were sweaty as she tightened her grip around the steering wheel to keep them from trembling.
Her thoughts were a jumble. She had no idea what had just happened, what could possibly have gotten into Clark!
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde indeed.
She had trouble reconciling the man who had attacked her with the man who’d apologized profusely. How could the man who hadn’t even so much as complained about her kick to his groin be the same person who had just cursed her with words she wasn’t sure she’d ever heard before?
But could Clark have been telling her the truth?
“No!” Lois had wanted to shout, but the word dying on her lips in a choked sob.
She wasn’t going to believe him, wasn’t going to make that mistake ever again. Enough was enough. In fact, she couldn't believe she had even run out of her own apartment instead of calling the police and getting him shipped off into a holding cell. She should really find the next phone and call Henderson’s colleagues.
But her foot wouldn’t listen, stubbornly pressing down the accelerator. Her hands held the steering wheel in a firm grip, not letting her pull the car to the side. All she really wanted was to get away from it all, away from all the hurt and confusion.
A tiny voice in the back of her mind spoke up to remind Lois that she’d been scared witless by the guy shouting curses at her. But hadn’t she just stood there and watched the same man, torn between her rage and the more tender feelings she had for him?
Lois gripped the steering wheel tighter, and following an impulse, turned the next corner on screeching tires. Her heart missed a beat and, startled, she shifted her foot to the brake, slowing down just enough to take the corner at a more reasonable speed.
“Damn you, Clark Kent,” she cried, shocked by her own recklessness.
Angrily, she slapped her hand against the steering wheel, gripping it even harder as if she wanted to punish it for Clark’s behavior. How could he do this to her, how could he break her heart like that?
Lois slowed the car, almost relieved that red lights were coming up in front of her. She took the time to look where she was exactly, since she hadn't paid much attention to where she was heading. With an angry growl, she realized that she was close to Clark’s apartment. Another curse escaped her lips before she pressed them into a tight line. Apparently, her subconscious was still pulling her toward Clark.
*Way to go, Lois,* she thought grimly.
It seemed like her subconscious hadn’t gotten the message. But while Clark’s place surely wasn’t anywhere she should be at, it definitely raised the question of what she was going to do now.
<
Lois, if you have any faith in me left, then please come find me where I sent you on that wild goose chase for a Godzilla doll I had dressed up as Superman. I’m in desperate need of your help.>
Lois shook her head at the unwanted memory. No, she certainly wasn’t going to help the creep. She’d just escaped him. And there was no way she was going to walk back into that mosquito-infested sewage reclamation facility. Why did he want to meet her there, anyway?
So, where else should she go? To the police? That would certainly be the wise choice. But to be honest, it would be her word against Clark's. After her violent intervention, not much had happened between them that would allow her to press charges. It wouldn’t surprise her if he'd try to return the favor if she did. As hard as she had kicked him, he might even be sporting a bruise to prove his point. And what did she have to substantiate her accusations?
The lights turned green and Lois still had no idea where to go. She pressed the accelerator and sped past the turn that would have taken her to Clark's place. Lois heaved a sigh. She needed a place to think. And since she couldn't go home or to Clark, the only refuge that came to mind was the Daily Planet.
She needed to get out of this dress that only served as a reminder of Clark's betrayal. Fortunately, she always had a change of clothing in the trunk of her car.
Lois took a U-turn and steered her car toward the Planet building. It wasn't that far and at this time the streets were already getting quieter after the rush hour peak. Roughly ten minutes later, Lois pulled her car into a parking lot next to the Planet. She let out a breath and leaned her forehead against the steering wheel.
All the nervous energy seemed to leave her at once. A violent sob shook her body and she was unable to stop the tears from flowing down her cheeks. She felt no longer able to muster up enough anger to keep the tears at bay. Despair washed over her in a powerful wave that made her body tremble with more sobs.
It was all so unfair. She'd gotten her hopes high and now the next guy had trampled on her heart. Why did he have to do that? Why Clark? She’d never expected him to be capable of such betrayal. It wasn’t like she hadn’t known that there was something he was keeping from her. But she’d never taken him for a predator. And worse, even, put the blame for his abominable behavior on Lex.
This hurt worse than finding out that Lex Luthor was a criminal mastermind, worse than waking up in an empty bed and finding Claude’s byline under her story a few hours later. It was much worse than seeing Paul kissing Linda, or Superman telling her that there was no future for them.
Lois wanted to scream and throw some plates against a wall. It had only been a date, one that hadn’t even happened. She’d been so worked up about it all day, but the reality of it made all her nightmares look like a joke.
Lois straightened in her seat. She wouldn’t have it. Her lower lip trembled with renewed anger at herself that she was even crying a single tear over a man. No guy on this whole planet deserved her tears. Still, it took a while before she could catch her breath and stifle the hiccupping sobs that were wrenching her body.
Jekyll and Hyde! Lex! She’d thought that Cheese of the Month had been an awful excuse.
Why hadn't she recognized the signs for what they were. Well, at least Clark had shown his true face before they'd even become a couple. At least she hadn't let it get as far as a marriage proposal this time. So perhaps, her track record was getting better.
She snorted bitterly. It was little consolation.
Lois took a glance in the rear-view mirror and saw smudges of mascara all over her face. She pursed her lips, took out a hand-kerchief and dabbed at her eyes, trying to rescue her appearance. When Lois was done, her eyes were still red and puffy from crying, but at least she no longer looked like a watercolor painting that had been left in the rain for too long.
With a huff, Lois got out of her car and closed the door behind her with a bang. Her emotions were too much of a mess to try and keep them in. She went around the car, opened the trunk, and fetched her bag before she closed the lid and headed inside.
The entrance hall lay quiet with the small booth closed. At this time, Lois didn’t even have to wait for an elevator. The door opened right before her as she pressed a button. A short ride later, she was back in the newsroom.
Again, it was empty. Whoever was working the nightshift was obviously out chasing a story. No smell of coffee greeted her that might have helped her to shake off the very real nightmare she’d lived through. She avoided looking at Clark’s desk as she walked past her own and over to Perry’s office, relieved that her boss was no longer here.
His office was the only place in the newsroom with a couch. Since she’d nowhere else to go, with maybe the exception of a hotel room, it was suddenly appealing to just spend the night at the one place where she felt reasonably safe. Of course, there was the possibility that Clark might come looking for her here. But she didn’t assume that he was keen on trying something again tonight.
*And if he does, I’m going to show him what my other knee is capable of,* she thought grimly.
Throwing a glance over her shoulder, Lois checked to make sure no one would see her before she entered Perry’s office. The last thing she needed was feeding the rumor mill. Though she might not be able to avoid it if she asked Perry to fire Clark. She didn’t exactly look forward to having to tell her boss what had transpired between them, though part of her also wished that she had someone to talk to right now. Someone who’d make her a cup of hot Oolong tea and sit down with her to listen.
Like Clark would - if the world was still a normal place.
<Now get out of here. Or on second thought, another kick wouldn’t hurt, I guess.>
<Are you being serious?>
<Get out of here. Get as far away from me as you possibly can. I love you.>Those last words had been spoken so tenderly, despite his obvious distress.
Once again, Lois tried to push the memory out of her mind. She needed to be angry at the man, not second-guess her decision to stay the hell away from him.
Clark had proven to be the ultimate liar. Worse than Lex. At least he’d never pretended to be someone else.
<Because I hope that you know me better than this, Lois. You should know I’d never do anything to harm you. I’d rather die than see you hurt.>Lois sank down on Perry’s tartan couch and squeezed her eyes shut. "Liar!" she sobbed.
Perry’s office seemed to have a calming effect on her - as if its usual resident was sitting in his chair, a picture of Elvis Presley above his head, demanding that she ask all the whos and whys before going out there to write a story.
Lois felt her breath becoming more even and the anger slowly fading, replaced by a more analytical consideration of tonight’s events.
Clark hadn’t lied when he’d said that he’d rather die than see her hurt. He'd taken a bullet to save her. He'd faced Superman's clone when he'd overstepped the line and kissed her without permission. That could have gone horribly wrong! Clark had proven his worth countless times.
What had happened tonight to change that?
Lois could only heave a sigh. She didn’t have the slightest idea, other than that Clark truly was the worst kind of jerk she’d ever encountered. But - and her analytical mind started turning its wheels again - it hadn't just been tonight, had it?
Clark had acted decidedly weird ever since he'd stepped into the Daily Planet this morning. As if he hadn't been quite himself. He’d seemed genuinely surprised as she’d told him about their date. Had he suddenly changed their dating plans because he hadn’t known about the concert and thus didn’t have the tickets? He’d just trudged along with her during their investigation, something he hadn’t even done during his first days at the Planet, when he’d still been inexperienced. And he’d seemed startled by how much she’d gotten out of Henderson.
Clark would know her better than that. Clark would bring in more than a simple account of a Superman rescue that had needed more editing than she was used to from him. She’d thought that he’d been distracted and upset about something. But maybe that wasn’t true at all.
Could he have in fact been Lex, as Clark had claimed?
But that was ridiculous!
*As ridiculous as an invisible man?* a tiny voice in the back of her mind whispered *Or a man who can fly and lift spacecrafts into orbit? Cyborgs? Clones?*.
She'd seen a lot of weird things she hadn't thought could be possible.
There was the undeniable fact that Clark had kissed her, undressed her without her permission. He’d gone and ruined what could have been a perfect date. And she hated him for it, hated him for making her dream of him in the nights and moon over him in her waking hours when she thought that no one was watching. He’d gotten her to fall for him, really fall for him, worse than she’d ever fallen for anyone else, including Paul and Claude and Patrick.
It didn’t add up, it didn’t make any sense whatsoever.
Why had he waited to show her his ugly side until she’d agreed to date him? He could have done so in the honeymoon suit or while she’d been under the influence of the pheromone. She wouldn’t even have complained. He’d been the perfect gentleman when she’d stayed at his place during the debacle with the Prankster.
Why now?
Why should he let her restrain him after he’d just attacked her and hadn’t stopped until she’d kneed him in the groin?
It was another thing that simply didn’t add up.
Lois just couldn’t understand how his recent attack on her fit with the person she’d gotten to know over the past year. If she hadn’t seen his face and heard his voice, she could have sworn that he'd never do such a thing to her. But would Luthor? In her presence, he’d never been anything but the perfect gentleman either. Or had that all been part of his mask?
But she was sure of one thing at least. For a few moments she'd been talking to Clark - her Clark - the man she was desperately in love with. Who else would know where she’d finally found the Godzilla doll? She didn’t believe Clark had ever told that story to anyone. Particularly not to Lex.
But how could it even be Lex? He was dead! She’d seen him fall.
Clark had promised to tell her everything if she came to the sewage reclamation facility. Why on earth would he want to meet her there? And - did she want to risk seeing him again? What if he had lured her out to…
She didn’t want to think about it.
But surely, if he wanted to rape her, there were better places for that than the sewers, weren't there?
So was she going to give him the benefit of the doubt?
