Jennifer Truberry was getting married. Again. Lois would believe it when the priest made the pronunciation; she had known the woman since fifth grade, and Jennifer's fickleness in men made Lucy look downright mature. At least Lucy's mistakes had never involved wedding registries or massive down payments on venues. Still, her old friend was happy for the time being, and a bachelorette party was as good an excuse as any to catch up.
Right now, the blushing bride and three other mutual friends were practically spilling their drinks as they whooped and hollered at the “cowboy” dancing on the stage. Lois had to admit, the man had a decent physique, though his charms didn't really hold much appeal for her. No, Lois had more sophisticated tastes. When it came to men, she was much more select.
“Alright Ladies, if you'll look up on the stage: It's not a bird or a plane…”
Lois nearly dropped her drink when a very familiar figure stepped out into the strobe lights.
**********
“I'm sorry, you saw Superman *where*?” Clark was staring at Lois as though she'd lost her mind, and frankly, she couldn't blame him.
“Dancing. On a pole. At a strip club.”
His eyebrows raised. “Dancing?”
“At first, yes.” Lois’ face grew warm at the memory.
“Lois, I'm sure it wasn't actually Superman,” Clark replied in a patronizing tone. “They probably just found someone who's well built and put him in a copy of the suit.”
“He looked exactly like him, Clark!” Lois protested.
Clark shrugged and leaned back in his chair. “Okay, so he *looks* like Superman.”
Lois sat on the corner of his desk and leaned forward. “But that's not all! I think he recognized me! He looked straight at me, and he smiled like he knew me, and that was even before I started stuffing—” she broke off.
Clark's eyebrows flew into his hair.
“Look, I had to get closer to be sure it was him,” Lois defended, “and the easiest way to do that—well, nevermind! Anyway, it's definitely him.”
“Definitely?” Clark echoed.
Lois folded her arms. “It's not a very concealing outfit, Clark!”
Her partner’s face reddened. “Still—” His voice came out as a squeak, and he cleared his throat. “Still, it probably wasn't him. Did he use any powers?”
“Well, no,” Lois admitted. “But, think about it, Clark: Superman isn't constantly flying around, saving people twenty-four seven! What does he do when he's not on a rescue?”
“Pole-dance?” Clark guessed.
Lois rolled her eyes. “I mean, he's got to have a home somewhere, right? And homes cost money, which means he needs a source of income.”
Clark stared at her.
“It makes sense!” Lois insisted.
Cat Grant happened to be passing by at that moment. “What makes sense?”
“Lois thinks she spotted Superman at a bachelorette party.”
Cat grinned. “Oh! Barry!”
“Barry?!” they both echoed.
“Haven't seen him in a while,” Cat continued, staring wistfully off into the distance. “He's one of the better Superman impersonators, but I think he got his start as Batman. Great guy.” She turned to wink at them. “And I do mean a *great* guy.” She swished away, leaving Lois staring after her.
“Barry,” Lois said flatly. After a few seconds, she stood up from Clark's desk. “Well, that's forty bucks down the drain! Barry?!”
Clark returned his focus to his computer. “Well, at least now we know that Superman isn't dancing on a stage somewhere.”
“Yeah.” Lois paused halfway back to her own desk. “I guess I'd better cancel that private session.”
END
