Lois & Clark Forums Forums Fan Fiction Lois & Clark Fanfic FDK: Foundations (1/?)

Goody, I get to start the feedback

Yep, I "enjoyed" the story!! and I'm holding you to your promise. I want to hear more soon.

This was just gut-twisting. Thank goodness you made this section short or I would have needed lots of Kleenex. Just the thought of Clark thinking of himself as some sort of wild beast instead of the wonderful person he is was pure torture.

At first I thought he was going to tell her right then and there. . .

Youv'e done such a great job of conveying Clark's feelings here. I can almost feel the elation radiating off of the written page and into me.

to say the least.

Please don't leave us here to long. I am extreamly currious as to how that press confrence is going to go. Is he going to be able to pull it off without sounding like a Brat(I'm taking my toys and going home) or without having the entire population of Metropolis turn into a lynch mob with the blood of (was it Calvin who brought the law suit) in thier eyes?

More soon PLEASE

Some how I don't think Lois is going to be too thrilled with that idea. It's a good start though.

Wow, Caroline. That was an awesome start. This is quite a different take on WWW.

Now get ready to post part II so we can really see what direction you're taking. I have to say...after promising Lois that he would never hurt her again, Clark really should have come clean and told her about Superman.

~Sheila

Retire?

Superman's going to retire?

That's ridiculous! And that's what Lois would say (much more forcefully, I'm sure) if she had any inkling of Clark's idiotic plans! That's all she needs, the guilt of knowing that Superman quit so he wouldn't ever leave her eating a chocolate donut by herself! Yeah, that would make her life complete!

Please come back with the next chapter so Lois can whap some sense into him! He's being a complete doo-doo head!

A new Caroline fic, YAY! Seriously, if you really understood how much I love your writing, you'd run and hide.

eating rats, I presume?

Painful thought, but a beautiful line.

And this is simply lovely. I've often felt this way myself, but what I love is your attention to detail. Sunlight on a hardwood floor is enchanting.

An unexpected ending! I can hardly wait to see where this goes.

Well I know Lois and now she can smack some sense into him. Laura

Ooh, Superman's going to retire?

Looking forward to this!
JD

Nice part, interesting.

Retire. Hmm, I think he will get away with it for a second or two.

Clark just can't NOT help. It isn't in him. In the AltVerse Lana was on him to not help. It didn't stop him.

Lois will again become so obsessed with Superman that her relationship with Clark will be forgotten.

Clark will decide that it is for the best, that he can't give Lois what she really deserves.

Shades of Superman II! Clark making decisions for Lois without consulting Lois.

If Clark would have left Lois's memory alone in a few days they would have been talking.

OK Lois would have been ranting and Clark listening.

"What you're dumping me because you think we can't have sex? Because it might not be safe for me? That mister is an excuse not a reason! Tell me Kent, just how great do you think the sex is for the wife of a quadriplegic? And where do you get off making decisions for me?" And on and on for quite some time.

Oooh! Yay something to read! (I'm trying to not go to bed because I'd have to get up in about an hour *lol* I need to be at the airport at 4:30AM - that's like so insane!)

Thank goodness for that! *lol*



Oh, shoot! He's got amnesia again... (*giggles*)

No, you lunkhead, that's not going to work! Don't you remember that you had to move around from place to place every single time you used your powers, for fear that someone would get suspicious? Imagine now that people have seen Superman in action - they're going to put two and two together pretty damn fast if they see Clark Kent fly around or use heat vision. Duh. How's that going to help you have a life with Lois? You think she's going to want to move around all the time like that? Have you lost your mind??? Silly Kryptonian...

Dude... that is so not going to work out. Lois would be floored if Superman retired and either way, how can you possibly even think of not telling her that *you* are (or were) Superman. She's going to freak out when she finds out, for one and secondly it won't take her long to understand you retired the superhero because of her and she's going to have a fit so HUGE it could put Doomsday to shame. (Doomsday, btw, is the mean and nasty Kryptonian being who gave Superman such a beating that the supposedly invulnerable Man of Steel *died* - Lois won't even need to throw a punch to achieve the same, trust me.)

Oh Clark... You really need to get your head examined if you think that plan of yours could ever really work. *sigh*

Great part, Caroline! I'm sorry if all my comments are really directed at Clark... *giggles* He's being a lunkhead is all. But a really well written lunkhead!

Looking forward to the next part!!

That's not true!!! Come on Clark can't you see that Metropolis needs Superman!!
well, it made me laugh. If you look at it that way, superman life isn't all that great.
Besides the fact that he has superpowers of course wait.. what did I just say?? of course Supermans life is great!!!
somehow I have the feeling that this happily ever after isn't possible if Superman gonna retire!! and I'm sure Lois isn't gonna be all that happy either when she finds out, right??
aaawww, so sweet!!
Can't wait for the next part!!!!

First off: Your writing is wonderful! You drew me in, captured me and didn't let go till the end of the part. *nods*

The story you tell, the points of view you give... it all fits. The reader (me) understands exactly where Clark is coming from, while at the same time yelling at Clark mutely in my head: "Nooo! You stupid! Not gonna work! Gah!"

I am really curious where you will take this. Very curious about Lois' reaction to Superman's retirement, to finding about Clark's secret (cause I'm convinced that she will figure it out sooner than later...), and so on.

Don't keep us waiting too long.

Sira.

LOL!!!

OMG! Sorry, but Terry, that completely cracked me up! Doo-doo head. LOL!!!

Okay, sorry about that Caroline. I TOTALLY plan to read this story and keep up with it as you post... that's my good intention, anyway. <g>

That being said... I haven't actually read the first part yet. As soon as I do, I'll be back! I'm so excited about a new Caroline story.

-- DJ

Wow! Thanks everyone for the responses!

I'm afraid so. I'd thought about posting a warning to that effect - "Caution: Lunkheadedness Ahead" or something like that, but then I figured it would be self-evident .



Now don't be shy, Terry. Tell us how you really feel!

From you? NEVER! In fact, you'd find it hard to get rid of me! Thanks so much for your comments, friend

Patrick, I enjoyed your theories! We'll see how many of them come to pass.

Lara, your comments cracked me up. I particularly loved this:

So what you're saying is, you think Lois might be a little upset with him over all of this?

Oddly enough, that does seem to be the general consensus so far...

Thanks so much to all who have taken the time to reply. I love reading your comments

Best,

Caroline

I don't know how I missed the posting of this story. It's fantastic! The whole paragraph in the beginning where Clark was musing over "lairs" and whatnot was so well written. And the rest of it was wonderful too. But yeah. I'm thinking Lois might have a thing or two to say about this whole "retiring" Superman thing. Kind of reminds me of Spider-Man 2. I wonder if Clark saw it. It didn't work then either! Hopefully Lois either beats Clark with a stick until he realizes he NEEDS to be Superman (Fig. 1 below)

( Clark --> <-- Lois )

Or Clark heads out to the nearest Blockbuster and rents Spider-man 2! Can't wait for the next part!

--Laura

Trying to post a mini-comment here...

Caroline, that was absolutely amazing. What you showed us here, I think, was how Clark's love for Lois had grown into an obsession with being accepted and *loved* by her for his own humanity. And if Lois can't love him for his human side, then, purely and simply and starkly, he will have to retire that aspect of himself. He will have to regard it as something he tried his hand at, like a sport, but when he found that he wasn't any good at it, or when he became seriously injured (because he had his heart broken, say) he had to give up his efforts in that sport. Clark Kent, who excelled at being a human, stumbled on the path of love, broke his heart, and was never heard from again.

But just as Clark was about to pack up his human identity and store it away for good, Lois came to him and declared her love for his humanity. For Clark Kent, the human. And Clark was so *saved*, so redeemed, that he decided that he would be the best human ever. Before, he had been a good human - well, really good under the circumstances. But now he decided that he would do away with the circumstances and just be damn good, great, excellent. Because now he would retire his alienness, his spandex and his cape and his insufferable need to fly off at a moment's notice and tell Lois lies until he was blue in the face. No more. Because from now on, Superman would be no more.

Caroline, that was so beautiful, so heartfelt, so wonderfully logical and right from a narrative point of view, and so harrowingly wrong on Clark's part! Because Lois can't love Clark unless she loves the truth about him. And the truth and the essence is that Clark is a Kryptonian who needs to be Clark Kent, who needs to don his colorful spandex and fly off to help people. That is who he is. And that is the person that Lois must love, if she is ever to love him at all.

Wonderful! Caroline, your premise is great, and your writing is superb. I'm not quoting, but I remember how the afternoon light slanting in through the window took on a special quality to Clark as Lois told him that she loved him: it turned into Fate writing a portentous message on the wall: humanity shall be your destiny. But Clark, you misread the writing on the wall. You have to be true to yourself, and if you don't give Lois the chance to love that truth about you, you are fooling her into loving a mirage. And then, she will never be able to love *you*.

Wonderful! Come back soon with more!

Ann

Thanks so much, Laura and Ann, for your comments! Sorry I didn't respond sooner - I was out of town and then recovering from being out of town.

Laura, would you believe I've never seen Spiderman 2? Now I'm wondering if I should go rent it! And I loved your clueless Clark and Lois as the pointy stick guy!

Ann, you read this part exactly as I hoped it would be read, and a writer can't ask for much more than that. Thank you for your not-so-mini-comment! I always enjoy your insights

I'll be back soon with part 2! Thanks to all who are reading .

Caroline

<sigh>

Okay...

So I'm finally back...

Like 2 months after I posted originally <ducks head>

But, I just read part 1 and I am so hooked. <g> I loved Clark's whole inner conversation about the "vest thingy" - had me cracking up.

I like how you've set this story up - it is believable - rather lunkheaded of him to think he can retire Superman... yet, still believable. He DID help people before he became Superman and he DOES deserve to have a life and get the girl...

I'll be interested to see how this unfolds. <g> Off to read part 2.

-- DJ <who hopes she'll be able to get caught up before Caroline posts the final part>

DJ!! I'm excited you're reading . I hope you enjoy the story!

Caroline