Well, I'm tired and dizzy and stuff and haven't really written anything in ages... but I'll give it a shot. Maybe I'll come back later with something better, but for now...
---
It was a dark and stormy night -- or, at least, it should have been, but, for some inexplicable reason, fate had decided to make it a warm and vaguely muggy midafternoon (the kind that's not really much of anything... not really clear, not really stormy, not really ominous... just sort of uncomfortable in the blandest way possible) when Clark Kent (who is -- unbeknownst to most, but, due to the miracle of alternate universe chronicling or something like that, beknownst to us -- in fact, Superman, except that he's really Clark Kent because that's who he's always been and Superman is more of a cardboard cutout personality he created so that he can use his powers, which he has because he's an alien from Krypton, which has a red sun, living on Earth, which has a yellow sun, for Good without endangering, you know, like his family and friends and stuff) came home to discover that Lois Lane, beautiful intrepid award-winning reporter for the Daily Planet and wife of Clark Kent (who, as mentioned, is also Superman, but only some of the time, when he has to be to do good deeds and preform rescues and go to charity events and stuff like that), had eaten all the chocolate in the house and, in a fit of desperate withdrawl, had opened up the secret case of chocolate-coated Kryptonite they'd kept hidden in a lead box in a secret drawer in the back of the fridge, camoflaged by a screen of old mayonaise jars, mustard bottles, and Chinese take-out boxes, thus endangering and potentially dooming her husband (who is sometimes a superhero, but not always) by exposing him to the deadly substance from his home planet which was the only thing which could possibly hurt or kill him (the substance, not the planet) for no better reason than that she was out of chocolate, which, really, come to think, wasn't that bad a reason.
---
Paul, who doesn't think he has a chance of beating out Mere's pet shop story, but what the hey. It's all in not-so-good fun.
