This was a great story! Well written despite the small problems with verb tenses and the possessives (gender).
As the others have said, the story was well thought out and your (Lois's) arguments for and against CK + S = couple were quite believable. First, she talked herself out of it, with supporting reasons. Then, she talked herself into it, with equally supporting reasons. A very funny story!
Writing in first person is hard, I've heard, but you did a good job on it.
And as far as "fixing" it for the archives - why not take up Archbish on his offer to help edit it? Sometimes BRs will edit for grammar if that's what you want, and those of us who GE for the archive also edit for grammar and spelling. Almost exclusively, as a matter of fact - BRs often provide support and story idea feedback, etc. while GEs do the "red ink" thing, fixing verb tenses and spelling.
If you were to fix the language errors with Archbish's help, you could then submit your story to the archive in a very
short time - this is
good.
Very good. We like to see stories make the archives.
Don't wait and fix it later, especially if you're also writing other stories. This story should be on the archive!
~Toc
