Chapter 1
Ever since the near marriage to Lex Luthor, she’d been slowly waking up to the realisation that her feelings for her partner were much more than simple platonic friendship. She was also starting to realise the depth of those feelings. It was more than whatever she’d thought she’d felt for Superman. After all, Clark Kent was her best friend. He was the one person she trusted more than anyone in this world. And though she knew Superman to be the very embodiment of nobility, honour and integrity, he didn’t make her laugh the way Clark did.
This is just such a ... delightfully simple (in a good way) *chef's kiss* description.
And if she were honest with herself, she likely wouldn’t have volunteered the two of them had it not been for the thought of spending time in a place as romantic as Belfast with her partner.
Honestly, this is a 10/10 Lois Lane plan. Things seem to go distractingly wrong in Metropolis...
Gently, she nudged Clark awake and he sat up, almost knocking his glasses off his face once more. She suddenly wondered what he looked like without them and at the same time, something inside her told her she already knew, though for the life of her she couldn’t remember ever seeing him without them. Surely she must have. After all, they’d known each other for almost two full years.
I love the vibe you're setting up here (and earlier) that she already knows. ...she just doesn't know she knows.
Chapter 2 (thank you for the chapter headers)
“I apologise for my…partner,” he said, wondering why he hesitated on that word. Was it because they were on the verge of becoming more than partners? Or was it because by saying it that way, it already sounded as if they were?
Ope!
I love your Lois, holy cow.
She sagged into him ever so slightly and he felt his body go warm at the accidental touch.
Awwwww.
Chapter 3
She was more than used to her partner getting this reaction from women, but the closer they got, the less she liked it.
Clark gave her a nervous glance and she realised that he was waiting to see what her reaction would be to this bit of news. Was it because it would mean the two of them would be sleeping in the same room? A strange thrill went through her at the thought, despite the travel.
This is adorable. He thinks she's about to blow up and she's thinking about getting down. He's totally misreading her in such a fun way.
“It’s alright,” she reassured him with a yawn. “I won’t bite. I’m too tired to.”
He sometimes felt like a parent keeping the secret of Santa for far longer than was strictly necessary.
OMG, what an impossibly perfect analogy!
“Well, we’ll just have to find one here,” Clark said, trying to find the bright side.
I would never have thought of this. But it sure makes sense. Corruption in Glasgow! I'm sure if it's there, Lois will sniff it out. Or stumble into it!
“Because you’re that irresistible?” She teased. Her eyes danced mischievously and he felt some of the tension lift.
YES!
Chapter 5
Still, she realised that her engagement with Lex had been rather chaste and she’d been happy to keep it that way. She hadn’t thought much of it at the time, but with Clark in such close proximity to her and the fact that they were sharing a bed, the contrast was startling.
That's a great point about Lex. I know we all know what was going on there, but it's an interesting detail for her to turn over in her own mind.
I can't pick a single line here, but Stewart and Gemma are SO utterly charming! Their gentle but direct advice is solid and seems to come from a place of such deep-rooted care!
Something about the low timbre of his voice told Lois she couldn’t say no even if she wanted to.
Dang, girl, get it.
Chapter 6
...walking through a winter-whitened Glasgow city centre..
This phrase is both evocative and just stunning from a wordsmith perspective. I loved the consonance so much that it distracted me and I had to go back and actually re-read the sentence for meaning. (Which is a compliment, not a negative.)
“Did you find it?” She asked. “Home, I mean?”
“If you’re asking if I plan on leaving Metropolis, the answer is no,” he assured her. She sat up and gently brushed a stray curl of hair away from his forehead in a way that made his heart clench with love.
“I was asking if Metropolis felt like home.”
“No,” he said with a gentle shake of his head. He reached out and cupped her face in his hands, marveling at her beauty even in the darkness. “You do.”
I was going to comment on on the second sentence here but awwwwww it got so much better as I kept reading - and that's a great way to describe this whole story overall. It just gets better as you go along. It's deeply warm and fuzzy! And yes, hot, too, but I feel like that sweet, easy, affectionate banter vibe is so much harder to capture.
Chapter 7
...Bit of the Glaswegian sense of humour.”
I love this story, but it's brilliant to include it here - it makes us feel like we know the city as well as you do.
Chapter 8
And now that he had his answer, the lies felt like acid on his tongue. Yet somehow, he couldn’t bring himself to stop. Not when he had everything he wanted.
Not that he really had her. How could he, when she didn't truly know him?
Thaaaaat is so hard to wrestle with. And this, set up by the nausea, is really clear and portentous.
When they finally pulled apart, he fought the urge to tell her he loved her.
Oh, Clark.
Like, if I read the names on the stone for that brief second those people live again, if only in my curiosity.
I looove love love this detail. With her penchant for searching for immortality, this completely fits in.
Chapter 9
Lois felt her heart twist a little at the realisation that he was proud of her.
Another brilliant example of all the wonderful little internal 'firsts' you're capturing in an early relationship.
Chapter 10
It was as if he’d discovered the most addictive drug in the world and his body and brain were now completely separate from one another.
Such an apt description! And his has to feel crazier for Clark, who's never even had the effects of a small stimulant like coffee!
“I don’t know what to say,” he finally said. “I don’t want to lie to you.”
Oh, yikes is that the wrong thing to say!
Also, I knew the suit was in there - I knew he wasn't wearing it, that she was heading into his suitcase. And I did NOT see this coming! Well done.
His hands shook slightly as he sat down on the bed, feeling the rumble of the Glasgow subway underneath.
This is a genius little add-in, to have the ground shake as the foundation of their relationship is similarly shaken, as their emotions are quaking.
I need you to know that today was the single most perfect day of my life. And if you never speak to me again, that won’t change.”
“I forgave you the moment you touched my hand,” she admitted. He felt his heart unclench. “I forgave you the moment you looked at me.”
“I love you,” he said. He hadn’t meant to say it. He certainly hadn’t planned on saying it and yet, he couldn’t stop the words from coming out of his mouth. “I have loved you since the moment I first saw you. And I know I shouldn’t tell you just yet. I know we only had one date, but I need you to know that.”
“I do know that,”
Omg, this is another section where you just up the ante in
Every Sentence. And it's just so sweet.
“Somehow it’s more impressive without the suit,” she told him.
I've never seen this articulated but I've totally felt this in every instance I've ever seen, comics, shows, movies.
Epilogue
“I think that this is the best damn piece of writing I’ve seen from you two in a while.” Perry finished.
Yay! I had not idea how much I was rooting for the Mars Bar story until this line hit!
Lois shot Clark a meaningful look and he returned it with a smile that made her heart skip a beat. He’d flown to Glasgow that morning and come back with one.
Ahhhh! That's TOO GOOD!
“I’ll meet you there,” she assured him as he tugged at his tie.
This was SO GOOD! It was such an incredible love story. We know these characters, but it really felt like getting to know them and falling in love with them all over again!
