"That you're Mrs Claus? Or that you're Mrs Clark? Ooohh---Mmmmmmph!!!" he spluttered. Lois had thrown him over her shoulder, using a Tae-Kwondo move, and now Mrs Claus held him face down, pressing him down into the snow.

"Don't you laugh, boy," she said menacingly. "I'm on Lois's side. If we Mrs Clauses don't stick up for each other, who will? And by the way, I'm the preacher.